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When sadness makes it hard to move forward

December 19, 2018

There is all this stuff I want to do today, but I feel too sad to do any of it.

The sadness is taking over and making it hard to focus on other things. But I sill keep trying to do the other things which pushes back against the sadness and I stay stuck in this weird tug-of-war.

OK, sadness, I’m sorry. I know I should give you space, I just… well I wish you weren’t here.

Sadness just stares at me blankly.

I mean, not that I don’t love you, the part of me who is sad. Oh shit. Yeah I guess I am not acting very loving towards you, am I?

Sadness starts crying.

I give it a hug.

“I’m so sorry. When you get sad I do try to disengage and that leaves you alone and stuck in the sadness. That’s not fair. When I can stay present with you, there is space and energy for you to feel through your sadness.”

But I keep jumping back, disconnecting with it because I am afraid of what feeling this sadness could lead to.

A Wiser Me steps in, puts her hand on my back and says “You can do this. You are more than strong enough.”

I hold my sadness in my arms and lay down.

With my heart open and willing to be present to what I am feeling, the feeling has changed. Sadness isn’t telling me these horrible heart-breaking stories anymore, or projecting into a scary version of the future.

There’s just this energy flow.

Sadness becomes vulnerability. Vulnerability becomes healing. I feel soothed.

Really? It’s that easy? Because a few minutes ago I was caught in this horrifying sadness…

I wonder if I can trust this sense soothing I’m feeling now.

My Wiser Me explains: You were reacting to the stories you were making up about your sadness, and then getting stuck in your reaction. When you snuggled up with sadness with an open heart and a wiliness to be present with what is actually happening, you pulled yourself out of that reaction. You came back to yourself.

Hmmmm.

And now? Now I feel like I can get to work on my creative projects.

Sadness, who isn’t sad anymore, is cheering me on.

In this way, I carry my sadness with me as I move forward with my dreams.

Sometimes we think we need to get rid of our sadness or our fear or our self-doubt before we can move forward.

Not true. You need to take all of you on the journey.

PS: There is still time to do the You Got This Vision * Alchemy * Magic for the New Year class! It’s FREE (until Jan 11) and you get instant access. This class is AMAZING!

You Got This Vision * Alchemy * Magic for the New Year

Space + Support for mapping out your next steps. And Alchemy + Magic for making amazing things happen.

This free class is open to all dreamers, everywhere – from the greenest newbies to the most seasoned dreamers.

We all benefit from time spent in supportive creative community, visioning, connecting with our magic and making space for the dreams that are ready to emerge next.

I would be delighted if you would be a part of it. We are stronger together.

Details + registration are here.

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Hello 2019! Journal Prompts for the New Year.

December 17, 2018

These journal prompts are for playing and creating with.

Use them as little diving boards to dive off into other things to explore – the most important part of journaling is following your creative impulse, not answering all of the prompts perfectly!

If you feel inspired to – play around with different coloured pens, markers and pencil crayons. Or use collage or make your own art to illustrate your answers.

When you engage your creativity in your journaling that makes it easier to access your creative genius, the part of you that knows how to bring your dreams to life – plus it’s more fun that way! But there are lots of ways to engage your creativity and of course you can also just use pen and paper if that’s what floats your boat.

The journaling prompts are divided into 2 sections: looking back and looking forward.

Goodbye 2018. Looking back:

What was amazing in 2018?

What did you do in 2018 that you’re proud of?

What did you learn/discover that you want to bring into 2019?

What do you want to leave behind in 2018?

What are you most grateful for about 2018?

How did your dreams grow in 2018?

What did you do to help your dreams grow in 2018?  What worked?  What didn’t work?

How did YOU grow in 2018? What gifts and strengths do you have now that you didn’t have in 2017?

Is there anything you need to do to complete your year? Any unfinished business that you’d like to finish, and leave behind as you move into 2019?

Hello 2019! Looking forward:

Try to list 5-10 things (impossibly big or microscopically small or anything in between) you’d like to have happen in 2019, in each of these different parts of your life:

health
relationships
creativity
purpose/career
money
self-love/self-care
spirituality
happiness
adventure/play

I know that seems like a lot, but the act of listing TONS of things can really open up your sense of possibility. So spend some time with this – I find it’s best to leave this list out somewhere for a week or so, so I keep adding new things as I think of them.

When you’re done go back through your list and imagine how each of these things will make you happier in 2019. If there is anything on your list that won’t truly make you feel happier – consider crossing it out.

What is your Big Dream for 2019?

Why do you want this?

How will you feel when you have it?

Do you already know how to make this dream real, or is this something you need to learn more about first?

What’s your plan for giving this dream what it needs to thrive in 2019?  Brainstorm at least 10 things you can try.

What do you want to STOP doing in 2019?  And what are some things you can you do to make that as easy as possible? How will not having these things in your life make you happier?

Then imagine yourself at the end of 2019 (You might want to draw/collage/doodle an image of you from one year from now).   How are you different?  How did you grow?  What new strengths and skills do you have?  Does you-from-one-year-from-today have any messages or advice for you?

Here’s to a sparkletastic New Year, for all of us.

I’m starting 2019 off right, with the Year of Dreams 2019 Journaling Kit, Alchemy Kit + Creative Dream Support System. 

Come join me – you can try the first week for free!

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Finding my vision for 2019.

December 14, 2018

I’m doing a lot of journaling and contemplating this morning, as I prepare for today’s You Got This Vision * Achemy * Magic for the New Year class.

I’ve been working with this dream of growing my business and ever since I got back from my creative retreat and this week I’ve been going deep in exploring how out of alignment I am with this dream.

I mean I want to be creatively FREE and having a functioning and healthy business is what supports that in being my reality. But I have all of this resistance to a lot of the business stuff.

And I feel so annoyed to write that here because I know I’ve written about this a lot over the years and I feel like why haven’t I figured this out yet and omg this is so boring just stop.

But then I remember that those are gremlin voices, and they only bother to speak when I am actually onto something, because they only show up when they are trying to keep me from something.

This is where it gets interesting.

As I kept exploring my feelings and reactions to all of this I noticed that I “growing my business” is not actually my dream. This is surprising because this is the dream I’ve been working with in my daily Creative Dream Alchemy practice for the last few months.

What I discovered this morning, buried under a pile of stuff inside me, is that the core of this dream the desire for the Creative Dream Incubator to live up to it’s true potential in the world.

My FEAR that the Incubator is not living up to it’s true potential pushed me into “grow the business” mode. As though bigger numbers would actually mean something. My fear pushed me out of alignment.

But that doesn’t mean I was wrong to be working with the dream of growing my business!

Because growing my business was the part I could see – it was the tip of the iceberg. Exploring this dream led me to understand what the real dream is.

Dreams are like onions! There can be infinite layers to them and dreams *should* change as you work with them.

So now when I think about supporting the Creative Dream Incubator in living up to it’s true potential in the world – well that feels amazing in ways that “growing my business” never did. And the ideas that come to me for how to do this feel nourishing, inspiring and fun.

It also helps me acknowledge all the ways that the Creative Dream Incubator IS being it’s potential. I think of the lives changed and the dreams birthed and the community of dreamers who are showing up for their dreams every day. 

I am making a difference.

And there is more work to do.

After 8 years of being self employed I want to stop thinking about the numbers.

I don’t want to grow my business! I want to DEEPEN it in ways that can’t be measured.

Now this is a dream I can sink my teeth into!

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[Free Class This Friday] You Got This Vision * Alchemy * Magic for the New Year

December 11, 2018

Space + Support for mapping out your next steps. And Alchemy + Magic for making amazing things happen.

This free class is open to all dreamers, everywhere – from the greenest newbies to the most seasoned dreamers.

We all benefit from time spent in supportive creative community, visioning, connecting with our magic and making space for the dreams that are ready to emerge next.

I would be delighted if you would be a part of it. We are stronger together.

Details + Registration are here.

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New experiment: Mini Alchemy Meditations in the Weekly Videos

December 7, 2018

This week I’m talking about my retreat and allowing the process of transformation to unfold.

Also: experimenting with sharing little alchemy meditations in the weekly videos. I am excited about this! In this week I did one about shining love on your dream.

 

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