I woke up this morning surprised that it’s February.

I had meant to do my February reflection + visioning journaling page (from the Year of Dreams 2018 journaling kit) before Feb 1.

I wanted to step into February already knowing what I want and what I’m going to do about it.

Instead I just found myself here, by surprise, and feel flustered and annoyed.

So I printed out the February journaling prompts + calendar, sat down and cut and pasted. Cutting and pasting into my journal always calms me, like I am creating these little containers to process and plan and so everything feels a little less messy and confusing.

I flipped back in my journal to January’s page.

At first that was depressing because January did not go as I had wanted it to. As much as I want to stress that creative dreaming is about the process of living with your dreams, and not about guaranteeing end results – sometimes it sucks when those results don’t come in.

But then I looked closer and saw how some of my goals actually cancelled other goals out. And that I got a lot of the intangible things, like feeling aligned with myself and making space for new creative projects.

And also: making space for new creative projects was not a simple task like I had hoped it would be. It was more of a journey to the underworld kind of thing of clearing our fears, doubts and limiting beliefs so I could start with a fresh slate.

So the more I looked back on my wishes for January the more peaceful and grounded I felt.

Like yeah sometimes things won’t go the way I want them to. Sometimes I may work my ass off and not get the reward I wanted. Sometimes my dreams send me to the underworld for the better part of a month and that makes it hard for me to meet my goals.

But that’s never the end of the story. It’s just one month.

And I can reflect on that month, take the lessons and gifts and use them to map out the next month. Again and again and again and again.

The monthly pages are helping me feel more grounded and sturdy in my dreams.

I’ve been doing a weekly reflection + visioning process for years which I know helps me better understand the path I am on and how to navigate it. I feel like adding the monthly reflection and visioning makes it all more grounded and sturdy.

Even though I won’t get my February page finished on February 1, I love this.