Get over yourself
Just get over yourself already.
This is the message I keep getting from my dream.
Not in a mean way, but in a lighting-the-path-ahead-of-me way. That it's just time to stop being so precious.
I am, and always have been, a million different kinds of tangled up about selling my work.
I have worked with these fears, limiting beliefs, self doubts and inner critics EXTENSIVELY - enough to allow me to support myself for the last 8.5 years by selling my work.
But that doesn't mean I am healed or transformed. I don't know that those are destinations that we reach anyway, it's more about being willing to be in the process.
Because there are ALWAYS more ways to grow towards our truth.
I've been putting the brakes on my own growth.
For good reason! I don't believe fast = best. I like slow.
And for the last several months my dream has been really clear. TAKE YOUR DAMN FOOT OFF THE BRAKE. It's time to let my dreams be the size and speed that they actually are.
For the last SEVERAL MONTHS my dream has been pushing for this, but it's taken me time to work through all of my feelings about it, of course.
When we rush ahead with new projects and ideas BEFORE taking time to process all of our feelings (and shadow feelings) about the thing - we just end up tangled up by our own creativity.
And when we spend FOREVER processing our feelings about a thing and waiting to feel ready before we act - we'll ever act.
With practice, you can learn to feel the difference in your body between holding back unnecessarily and rushing forward unwisely and allowing your wisest self to set the right pace.
Moving forward with your WHOLE self, connected to your inner truth and inner power just feels so completely different than any other way of moving through the world.
(This is why I always encourage my students to do DAILY PRACTICE when at all possible. There is so much richness, power and magic that is available to us when we can practice being present with it)
My dream wants me to take my foot off the brakes. Maybe even break the brakes.
This isn't a "leap and the net will appear" ungrounded kind of thing. It's a "you've spent over 10 years building the foundation and you can trust it" kind of thing.
I see, with absolutely clarity, the places where I hold back.
I see, with absolutely clarity, how to stop holding back. I just don't know how to get to that place where I can actually DO IT, you know?
I'm standing on the precipice.
You know what's funny? In over 10 years of coaching people to make their dreams real, almost every time I ask someone to visualize where they are and where their dream is and what's in between - they have this cliff scenario. They're standing on the precipice. They are ridiculously high up, jumping means certain death. The dream is close enough that they can just start to see it but there is no way to bridge the precipice.
There is no path.
That's how it feels. For all of us.
With all the bridges I have built in my life, I do feel a bit tired at the thought of facing another precipice. On the other hand, with all the bridges I have built in my life, I do have the skills and experience to build this one.
So here I am, on the precipice.
There is no path that leads from where I am to where I want to be.
That's because your path is yours to build.
The path to your dream isn't supposed to exist! Because you build the path by walking (which is one of the principles of Creative Dream Alchemy).
For the last week I've been camped out here at the precipice. Acclimating to it. Exploring the terrain. Looking for possibilities and supplies to build this bridge.
I'm ready to start.
I don't FEEL ready.
But I know I AM ready because my intuition and my dreams are clearly telling me to begin.