making a big dream real

Update 32: The Reality Of Bringing A Big Dream To Life

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I’m not interested in the numbers.What I am excited about is having that feeling of DOING MY BEST, to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life inside the Circle, to DO MY BEST to work on the places where I hide and hold back, to DO MY BEST so share my gifts. ? And I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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Last week’s update was uncomfortable for me to share (later that day I added another post about how being in the process of change is hard) ?Last week I wasn’t sure what my dream was anymore, which, as a professional dreamer, is embarrassing to admit.? But it is a part of the process.

A faraway dream is pristine.? It’s perfect and beautiful and you just know that once you get it your whole life will change and you will be deliciously happy every day always for the end of time.

Dreams you’re working on are messy.? It’s like that dreamboat you see from across a crowded room looks much better in that moment than they do when they’re leaving their dirty socks on the floor as though the clothes hamper isn’t right there.

That pristine dream is a fantasy.? To bring that dream from fantasy into reality you have to… bring it into reality, which is messy and awkward and hard sometimes and doesn’t look like how you thought it would but OMG it feels amazing it have it for real.

Messy, awkward and hard are just a part of the process and do NOT mean there is anything wrong.? That’s why I make sure to share the awkward hard parts, without them you don’t get to the dream come TRUE.

Giving up just because it’s hard is lame.? And holding onto that fantasy instead of having the reality is lame.

So, last week was hard.? I was doing a lot of work shifting my perceptions and moving my comfort zones around, which is really, really awkward to do.? (For Creative Dream Circle members, Module 4 of the Creative Dream Incubator helps with this)

Working through all of that hard made this week FUCKING AMAZING.? I got more clarity on what I really really want and feel more sure about myself, which is what happens when you work through the hard parts.

Creative Dream Update Questions Part 1:

(I don’t do Part 1 every week, but since things are shifting so much now I am re-doing this part)

My dream is:? To do my best.? To know and feel deep down in my bones that I am doing my best in creating the Circle and holding the Circle and growing the Circle.? To do my best to work on the places where I hold back and hide and play small – not to hit a certain number, but so that I can do my best to share my gifts.? And to keep growing what “my best” is.? With this as my focus for the rest of the year, I can see it opening up new possibilities for other projects for next year.

I want it because: This feels like how I grow into more of who I am.? It lights me up.

When I have it I will feel: At peace, connected, aligned, deeply joyful, in the flow.? Free-er.

Then my regular Creative Dream Update Questions:

What happened in the last week?

Last weekend I had the big breakthrough, which looked like this:

That’s where, after feeling so fuzzy and unclear – everything about my dream became clear.? That’s where I re-wrote what my dream is.

And I kept playing in my mandala journal to get more insights.

(I am doing a Mandala Journal class this fall in the Creative Dream Circle.? This week I posted about it in the Circle to get people’s thoughts, questions and ideas for what they want me to cover in this class.)

I started a whole new Treasure-Mapping Journal.

And I did make a video about it where I talk more about how I went from fog to clear skies.

I did a lot of coaching this week, including a day-long in-person coaching session, which is my first time doing that and it totally rocked.? Here I am getting ready to go that morning:

I had such a great time with that I would like to explore if I want to offer day-long virtual coaching retreats.? Kind of blows me away to think of what we can accomplish in just one (super-focused, super-magic) day.

I’m also in love with my small group coaching for world-changing coaches/healers/teachers and am thinking about doing more of that kind of work.? The small group is MAGIC.

How do I feel about this?

I feel so, so so so good.? I love my new direction/clarity.

When I set my dream of welcoming 800 people into the Creative Dream Circle this year, I didn’t pick that number out of a hat.? I was using all the things I teach, to? listen to my intuition and to my dream itself about what my next steps are.

I know that reaching towards 800 is what is helping me get clear on what I really want.? It was an important part of the process.

Last week I went on hiatus from making videos for the rest of the summer. Last week I needed to feel the feeling of having the whole rest of the summer off from doing videos.? I needed that space.

That feeling mattered, the actual break may not matter at all.

Then this week I did a new video.? This week I felt differently and really wanted to share this story in a video.? All we can ever know for sure is what we need right now.? I feel happy and free about giving myself the space to sort out what I need and how I want to keep moving forward.

I’m also feeling really super grateful about where I am right now.? To be able to pay for my happy life without needing a job and while doing the things that light me up is really special.? While life is always evolving and I am always evolving and there are always more adventures to go on and more ways to grow, even if I stayed right here for the rest of my life that would be pretty awesome.

What do I need now?

Lots of Treasure-Mapping!? I love how that process shifted how I was feeling and I want to dive deeper into it before teaching it next week. (Click here for Treasure-Mapping class details)

What does my dream need now?

My dream is so happy that I’m feeling the love and am deeply and happily committed to it.? What it needs is for me to be more deliberately connected to it in the moment, to remember that it’s already here as I keep stepping into it.

Taking all of this into account, my next mission is:

DO MY BEST for next week’s Treasure-Mapping class.

Keep making my own maps and drawing mandalas and having lots of good quality quiet creative time.


A peek inside my process: How I discovered clarity, power + joy in the middle of confusion + self-doubt.

Being engaged in a daily creative/spiritual practice always brings me back to my magic and helps me to receive whatever it is I need in the moment. This is why I teach so many different creative/spiritual processes, so that I always have something I can reach for that is engaging and fun enough that I’ll do it even when I’m SUPERcraky.

Treasure Mapping is one of those processes.? When I was feeling so confused and unsure last week, I knew that Treasure Mapping could help, and the thought of spending the next few weeks making maps every day made me so happy, I ran out and got myself a new journal to FILL with maps, and decorated it:

treasure map art journal

 

What happened when I started Treasure Mapping was so magical, I HAD TO make a video to share it, even though last week I went on a summer-long hiatus from making videos.

Having lunch while treasure-mapping.

July 10 (next week!) I?m teaching a live-on-the-phone treasure-mapping class.

(It will be recorded and you absolutely won’t miss out on anything if you can’t be there live – you’ll still get to share your questions and stories and photos in our private forum)

You’ll learn a fun and creative way to GET the clarity you?ve always wanted about what to do next with your dream, without waiting for the answer to somehow magically come to you.? You?ll learn how to access deep and true intuitive wisdom right when you need it.

The cost of the Circle is going up to $147 this summer.? I’m still working out the details to share more specifically when the price increase will come into play, but this will be the last class you can join in for the $100/year rate.

 

 

Update 31: Searching For Clarity

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I’m not interested in the numbers. I’ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life. And now I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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Creative Dream Update Questions Part 1:
My dream is:
I want it because:
When I have it I will feel:

Part 2 is 4 questions to ask yourself every week, plus a mission statement?
What happened in the last week?
How do I feel about this?
What do I need now?
What does my dream need now? Taking all of this into account, my next mission is:

31

When I started this year- long update series, I wanted to share the real, ongoing story of holding a big dream steadily over time.

Part of that real ongoing story includes the parts where I don’t want to hold the big dream anymore, I want to pick up something smaller.? I also wanted to share the truth of how some days I’m not sure what I want.

Inner critics are always trying to erode our dreams, so there’s that. But there’s also the fact that the more you work with a dream, the more it changes. The better you get to know it the more you learn about what you really want.

All this to share the truth that if you feel lost with your dreams: that’s ok.? Doesn’t mean you won’t get there.? The only way you can fail is if you give up.

My dream is: right now what I really want in relation to this dream is to feel better about how I’m putting this out there, to put it out there clearly and in a ridiculously inspiring way.

I want it because: my current lack of clarity is a TANGLE and tangles are uncomfortable. Untangling tangles makes more space inside for joy and creativity and delight.

When I have it I will feel: more aligned with my inner truth, more powerful in my life, more clear about my mission.

What happened in the last week?

A lot!? A lot is changing right now.

I did decide to increase the price of the Creative Dream Circle, though I am still working out the details of when and by how much.? I wrote recently about how honesty and integrity need to be the foundation of your work and it no longer feels in integrity to offer such a low price for so many classes.

It was a GREAT idea to do this earlier this year, to create an opportunity for people to join at a lower cost, but that this is not the right way to move forward with this.? And I can’t be doing things that feel wrong and expect that to lead me to things that feel good!

And it stopped feeling right to do the weekly free videos – though these were never a part of the Creative Dream Circle they were a part of my work schedule.

Right now I’m giving lots and lots of space in my schedule for integrating new ideas of how I want to present my work.

Marketing is how you shine your light and your message out into the world.? While I’ve gotten a million times better with this than I used to be, I still have a long way to go.? I know I don’t define clearly enough how I can help.

And this means people who like my work and have the exact problems that I can help them with are only getting tiny snippets of help from my freebies instead of joining the Circle and getting deep-down full-on transformation of their problem.

I’ve struggled with this mainly because I help people do things that they think are impossible.? So when I say I can help you ___ and you don’t believe that’s possible so you don’t really hear me.? And I get frustrated and don’t know what to do to communicate more clearly.? It’s like I’m holding up a ball of magic and offering it, and explaining what it’s like on the side that is facing me.? But over on your side, the ball of magic it looks entirely different, so there’s this disconnect.

That struggle is changing like all struggles do when you approach them with presence, love and creativity.

And right now I’m giving most of my time to exploring and integration new ways of presenting my work and my ideas.? Ways that make it clearer so that the people who are looking for help can find it more easily.? In other words, I’m clarifying my marketing message.

Anywhere where things are not crystal clear is a place that you can hide in.

Being in the murky parts and cleaning them up is deeply uncomfortable.? But it also fuels your soul in this really delicious way because the truth is you don’t need places to hide, it’s safe to be seen and shine bright.

(That is one of the theme that came up in this week’s Group Coaching Call For Healers/Teachers/Coaches/Helper-People.? How we all seem to be terrified of visibility and yet there is no evidence that it’s going to harm us.)

Another thing I’m noticing this week is about my private coaching.? As I created the Circle I started to see new possibilities for my business, to shift out of one-on-one work and shift into creating this community and offering deeply transformative classes and freeing up my schedule by not working with so many people one-on-one.

It’s true that I really really love having time freedom and not having a whole bunch of things scheduled.

But in noticing how much I value time freedom I kind of forgot how much I value doing this deeper work with people individually.? This week I’m noticing how happy I am when a new client signs up for a session, or when an old one comes back.? I’m noticing how I feel light and inspired and happy when I hang up the phone from a session.? I’m really happy to be doing this work with people.

How do I feel about this? I feel like I am definitely on the right track and I like how quickly I’m moving forward.

What do I need now? As always, self-care and daily creative-spiritual practice for time to explore and integrate how these shifts in perspective impact my inner and outer worlds.? The path to your dream us inside of you much more than it’s outside of you.? I’m learning a lot about marketing right now but if I don’t take time to really integrate and implement (in my own unique way, which can only happen after integration) what I’m learning it’s not going to help me with my dream.? So it means taking lots and lots and lots of time to think about this stuff.

What does my dream need now? I get this image that my dream is at a dance. It’s having a great time dancing and it understands that right now I need to be curled up on the floor with my journals.? This speaks to how my dream can grow larger than me. How I really can stay home, curled up with my journals, while the Circle holds space for transformation and magic for the members.

Taking all of this into account, my next mission is to: keep doing exactly what I’ve been doing. I am getting some really great help with my marketing, I’m making great progress on clarifying my story and my message and will be making my way through re-writing most of my website.

This also means is lots of bike rides and journaling as I give myself space to settle into new ways of seeing things.



I don’t know where to put this part, so I am putting it here:

I wrote this update, and then was kind of cranky about it.? I was going to get it ready to put in the Creative Dream Circle and didn’t do it because I felt cranky, so instead I made some art.

And then it dawned on me: this isn’t my “big dream” anymore.

It’s something I want, it feels like a business goal that I will meet – maybe not this year but as long as I keep working/playing at it I’ll get there.? It feels like I have all the pieces now.

I feel happy about this, it just doesn’t feel like a dream (a dream being something that I desire desire desire and feel all lit up about and how when I have it I’ll be more ME).? Mostly – I’m not super excited to keep talking about it.

I LOVE AND ADORE everything that happens INSIDE the Circle.? That is an absolute dream come true and I feel so grateful for it and so happy to do the work of supporting it.? I guess I’m feeling like I don’t want to be focused on growing the numbers.

The dream shifting and now that I’ve added this to the update, I don’t feel cranky about it anymore.? I am interested to find out where this goes next.


Update 30: Halfway up the mountain

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I’m not interested in the numbers. I’ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life. And now I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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30

Last week I just did a quick update because so much was happening.? The more you’ve got going on the more important it becomes to take time to reflect on what’s going on.? Otherwise you end up moving in the direction that outside forces want to lead you in, and not in the direction of your choosing.

These weekly updates are grounding and orienting me on/in the path as I continue to move towards this dream.

What has really changed for me recently is my perspective.?? And it’s changed somewhere deep down inside and it hasn’t quite bubbled up to the surface yet as a clear understanding of what it is, exactly, that has changed.? All I know is that I see everything differently now.? And I like it.

It’s the end of June.? I’m six months into working on this dream, holding it with deep commitment and steady progress. I just wanted to point that out because sometimes I hear people try something once and nothing happens so they give up.? The only way to win is to stay in the game.? And if your dream doesn’t matter enough for you to stay in the game then you’re working on the wrong dream.? When your dream leads you into deeper alignment with your own heart and soul there is never a reason to give up on it.

I am so in love with my dream, with the Creative Dream Circle, and with how it’s changing lives.

Sometimes people join and they’re unsure…

  • they don’t quite believe in themselves
  • there’s this thing that has been stuck and they haven’t known how to un-stick it
  • they’re not sure they know what their dream is
  • they want their dream so bad but they think it could be impossible

And they start using the Circle and everything starts to brighten up.

Or else they join and they’re all lit up and inspired and ready to work on that HUGE and so amazing they can hardly speak its name dream and the Circle works its magic and, miracle of miracles, they get what they wanted.? They get what they really, really wanted!? Do you know how rare that is in our world?

Healing. Transformation. Miracles. I don’t use any of those words lightly.? And I see them happen all the time.? What I have to offer here is really amazing, it’s not like anything else out there and it’s making the world a better place.? I feel protective and nurture-y about the Circle.

I’m feeling more clear about doing what I need to do to take care of this: stronger and clearer boundaries all around. So a few things are going to change.

One thing is that the cost of the Circle is going to increase.

I’m still working out the details of when and how much but this is happening.? When you sign up at the current $100 price, you can stay in the Circle for $100/year for as long as you choose to remain a member.? Even when the price increases your price will stay the same until you cancel your subscription.

The other thing is that my free weekly videos are on hiatus for now.?

There are just other things that need my attention right now.? One thought I have is that those videos may come back in the Circle only.? All I know for sure is that I need permission (from myself!) to not do these right now.

The big change is on the inside.

Over the last few weeks, the experience of connecting with the heart and soul of my dream has totally changed.? Now it shows up as a wheel inside me.? It’s like the dream and I have merged and I am more quickly growing into the me-who-can-hold-this-in-her-energy-field.? This is the best feeling ever.

And onto the Creative Dream Update questions:

What happened in the last week?

The qualities that were helping me on my journey this week were: courage, movement and expansion:

The pic from my Creative Genius Planning Session on Monday, which I wrote about here.? I love my Creative Genius Planning Sessions Kit because it helps me consistently move forward in ways that are healing and nurturing for ALL parts of me (no bulldozing or forcing myself to do shit I don’t want to do) even when I feel doubtful and afraid and can’t see my next steps.

So I’m not just making external progress, I’m growing into who I want to be on the inside (while also making external progress towards creating the life I want to be living).

And I’m still doing tons of mandala drawing:

And I am just really happy: still soaking up the afterglow of the Love Your Life Creative Journal Class (people keep emailing me to ask if they can still get this class if they join the Circle now – the answer is YES. And also – do it!? Loving your life is the BEST) and doing lots of things I love: drawing, journaling, bike rides, park visits, getting lots of sleep and reiki, etc, etc, etc.

The small coaching group for healers/teachers/coaches started and I am 100% in LOVE with everyone in the group.? So amazing gather a group of creative world-changers together and I love how inspiring our first call was.? Plus – the group sold out with hardly any promoting, I am really happy about that.

As a student, I started a new class on marketing, and finished the business class I had been in for the last 3 months.? I am almost always taking a class – I love working with lots of different teachers and mentors.? Feeling inspired and supported.

And I gave the Give Your Dream Wings e-course (my free introductory course) a makeover.? As I was doing that I was re-listening to the videos and holy crap that’s an amazing class.? Simple and effective.? Thinking I may want to do a bit more to promote it.

How do I feel about this?

I’m excited about some new shifts I see happening in my business.? I’m noticing places where I used to hold back, and am not willing to keep holding back.? I’m also seeing places where I’m not doing things as efficiently as I could and feel inspired to CHANGE those things.? Progress!

I’m also feeling this really deep down happiness mixed with trust and light.? It’s like I’ve climbed halfway up the mountain.? I’m feeling amazing from the exercise and fresh air, and already the view is fucking amazing and has transformed my perspective on everything.? And there’s still more mountain to climb so who even knows how much better this is going to get!

What do I need now?

To look at some shifts in my work schedule.? I want more time dedicated to this new class I’m taking – to be implementing everything immediately into my business.? Plus some new ideas are coming to me for things to do inside the Circle, I want some time to explore them.

And I think I need MORE journaling time.

What does my dream need now?

This week my dream is a wheel and it needs me to turn with it.

I think I understand what this means, and that making these shifts in my work schedule are how I start to turn with it.? It’s also a mindset shift though, so my dream needs for me to have more quiet time to myself to be with that and let it sink in.

Taking all this into account, my next mission is:

More journaling. Schedule shifts. Making space for new ways of doing this, letting go of old ways.


Update 29: Manure Makes The Flowers Grow (and dreams too!)

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I’m not interested in the numbers. I’ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life from a place of delight and gratitude and plenty.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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manure

This week started HARD, capital H, capital A, capital R, capital D. HARD.

I did have to laugh at myself a bit – I know that doing a class specifically on happiness has a tendency to bring the things that block happiness to light.

The story was always there, rooted in fear and shame and lack.? But it was all tightly rolled up, like a stone.? A stone that was blocking possibility, but it had been there so long I didn’t notice it anymore.

Unraveling the story in preparation for Love Your Life, of course, makes it impossible to not notice.? It’s like the rock exploded and instead of keeping this story so neatly contained it was now… well it was everywhere.? Impossible to avoid.

The teacher and healer in me knows that this is good.

This is how those stories get broken down back to their essence and healed and transformed.

This is how the fear and shame and lack get released.? This is how new stories get written.

But every other part of me was not so welcoming of the situation.?

It’s painful and scary and hard.? I felt particularly freaked out to be getting ready to teach this class where we’d be working with joy, delight and love when I was feeling so much the opposite.? And I blogged about that earlier this week.

But I have the tools to work through it effectively and quickly.

And on the other side of that, things look really different.

I am more connected to the WHY of why I do this work and why I am moving towards this particular dream of growing the Circle.

I am more in love with my work, my life and my self than ever.

There is more room inside of me for trust and courage.? I feel indescribably amazing.

This kind of energy healing really is the best drug ever.

That’s why the Creative Dream Circle includes the Un-Sticking Station which is ALWAYS there to lead you through that process.? Because the shitty parts are a part of the journey.? And when you’re in the shitty parts it’s hard to remember how to get out of them.

But when you bring creativity and love and wisdom and power to how you handle the shitty parts – you grow your superpowers and make more space inside of you for more of whatever you want: abundance, joy, calm, delight, creativity, etc, etc, etc.

So as I write this on Thursday morning I am still in the afterglow of deep healing, and in the pre-glow-magic of the Love Your Life Creative Journal Class – we’re doing our live playdate this afternoon.

There is more that I would like to share, about shifting perspectives, but need to save my energy for our class today.? (I usually write these on Thursday afternoons, and this week that time is devoted to the Love Your Life Creative Journal Class.)

So I’m not going to answer the Creative Dream Update Questions (posting them here for Circle members so you can use them in our weekly update circle: What happened in the last week? How do I feel about this? What do I need now? What does my dream need now? Taking all of this into account, my next mission is:)

I am so in love with all of this, and so grateful for all the amazing beings I get to share this work with, inside the Creative Dream Circle.? If you’ve been on the fence about joining, I’ve got to say: DO IT.? If you like my work enough to be reading these update posts, you’ll totally love what I have to offer inside the Circle.


Update 28: Healing the Inner Critic

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling ? but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I?m not interested in the numbers. I?ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity to serve more creatives in bringing their dreams to life. And I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I?ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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healing the inner critic

Update TWENTY EIGHT.? I’ve been writing an update every week for twenty-eight weeks.? That’s kind of amazing.

This week I am struck by what is happening inside the Creative Dream Circle.? Huge shifts, deep healing, new openings: the kind of stuff that is really hard to talk about.? But I am so happy to have created this space where this stuff can happen.

Almost everyone has an idea in mind of what it would mean, to be fully engaged with their dream.? And it almost never turns out the way they thought it would.

Instead, they find something softer, richer, more beautiful.

I love that I have created this space for these miracles to happen.? And I love how CONSISTENTLY the miracles happen, as long as people show up for them.

I really believe in what I’m doing and I’m really appreciating how good it feels to have that congruence between my soul, my purpose and my work.

Onto the creative dream update questions:

What happened in the last week?

I’ve been writing a LOT.? I’ve been working on the Love your Life Creative Journal Class. Here I am working on the colouring book/guided journal part, in a cafe on across the street from my favourite park.

PLUS! I made a video for the Love your Life Creative Journal Class. which I am totally in love with, but how can you not be in love with something that is all about loving your wonderful life?

I’ve been drawing a LOT. (Note purple-stained thumb, you’ll see why in the next photo) I started a new journal of mandalas and am filling it up like crazy.

I dyed my hair purple.

(This is me against a purple pillow which matches my hair perfectly)

I’m still growing out my grey, but got tired of the faded-brown-dyed hair, which is just going to keep fading since I’m not colouring it anymore.? So I am having some fun with it while it grows out.? I didn’t colour my roots at all.? Brown/grey roots with purple hair is kind of cool!

This is from am older page in my journal that I flipped through and landed on this week.? Remembering how I felt then, and how I feel now was such a relief.? The work I’ve been doing for the Love your Life Creative Journal Class is really exactly what I need right now.

How do I feel about this?

I’m super happy, but something feels a little off.? Like I wish there was more to report in my update.

Sitting with that, I get: I want to be more structured.? Like I probably don’t need to be doing anything differently from how I’m doing it, but I’d like to be approaching my work in a more structured way.

Looking back to my Monday Morning Creative Genius Planning Session for this week, I see I had FREEDOM, EXPRESSION and DELIGHT working on my team.

creative planning

I definitely had that.? And now when I look back on my week, a tiny inner critic is agitated about not working enough and not being organised enough and blah blah blah.

So, I take the little guy into the Un-Sticking Station and unravel everything until I get to the truth.

Healing the Inner Critic:

EVERY inner critic or fear or doubt holds a part of your truth, so if you just ignore it or fight with it you never get access to that piece of your soul.

That’s why I’m always using the Un-Sticking Station in the Creative Dream Circle.? It dissolves the parts that are not true and heals the wound so you can access the truth.? It’s all about healing the inner critic, fears and doubts that we all have so that we are more free to do what we want to do (this things are holding you back more than you think).

In this case, putting my inner critic into the Un-Sticking Stationg transformed it into a kitten who likes to nap in the sun.

The kitten needs to be cared for.? It does need structure and routine.? Not in a harsh “you have to do this exactly like THIS or else you fail” way, but in a supportive “let me take the best possible care of you because you are the sweetest thing ever and I loooooooooove you” way.

OK, I see what this needs.? A structure adjustment!

What do I need now?

To keep working with healing the inner critic.? And a structure adjustment!? But before I explore this more I want to find out what my dream needs…

What does my dream need now?

When I checked in with it, my dream reminded me that it needed to bounce and zoom this week.? Purple hair! Lots of bike rides! Drawing mandalas! Colouring! BRING IT!

It seems that my tiny inner critic is not that happy BUT my dream got what it needed.

My dream says that bouncing and zooming broke some STUFF loose.

My dream is sorry, but yes I have to deal with that STUFF – noticing old stories and ways of being that need to be healed and transformed.

Taking all this into account, my next mission is:

Deal with the STUFF that got knocked loose.? Work with these old stories and create some new ones.? Healing the inner critic.

Plus a structure adjustment.

OK, kind of in love with how this is working.

I actually AM working within a structure I just kind of forgot!? I made a schedule of classes for 2014.? These classes are what I wanted to bring to the Circle in 2014.

These specific classes hold the qualities of what I need on the path with this dream.? So I can trust this schedule as my structure.? Now, suddenly, all the playing and zooming and bouncing actually does fit in with the structure.? This is how I am working with the energies of the Love your Life Creative Journal Class? and how I’m getting set for the next classes I am creating, the SUPERHERO class and the MANDALA class and the MAGIC JOURNAL class.

This is how I am doing the ongoing work of healing the inner critic and the fear and the doubt that keep me from my dreams.? This is how I’m activating my superpowers and growing the Circle.

It’s all coming together so perfectly and sometimes I forget to trust that.

Writing this update felt like a huge healing.

PS: There is still ONE spot left in my small group coaching for teachers/healers/coaches/helper-people who want to help more people. Is it yours?? Get it here.

Update 27: Zoom and Bounce! My dream is ready to party.

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I’m not interested in the numbers. I’ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life. And now I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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This week has been amazing.? It feels like summer is in full bloom, I’ve been having so much fun riding my bike and spending lots of time outside.? I was also ridiculously productive!? Yay week!

What happened in the last week?

Last week I shared:

I?d like to have a stream of MIRACULOUS PRODUCTIVITY happen so I can get my stuff done quick and make some time to explore a new idea that came to me this week, about doing some small group coaching program, working only with teachers/coaches/healers/helper-peoples to strengthen their superpowers and help them help more people.

And it happened! I put it out there!

I’m so thrilled with the response to this.? I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to go ahead with it, given how complicated it seems to get a group of international people together at the same time but I’ve (already!) got a fantastic small group of people coming together.? Plus we may be able to create a second group at a different time – most likely in the evening.

(So if you want to play but the times I listed don’t work – do get in touch with me!)

And this is more related to my goal with the Circle than I realised.

The more I get to know the essence (heart and soul) of the Circle and how it’s here to support people the more I learn about how the Circle wants to grow.? This is something it wants – having a small group doing more of a deep dive with weekly coaching benefits the whole – this creates a more solid foundation for the magic.

It’s like putting down deeper roots so the branches can sprout out taller.

Plus I’m getting the Love your Life Creative Journal Class ready.? I’m filling the playbook with mandalas to colour and juicy journaling prompts and healing energy processes.? I’m having so much fun with this!? (It starts June 12 in the Circle)

And I re-wrote the page for the Creative Dream Circle.? (I shared the process of writing the sales page here.)

I’m really thrilled with it.? It can be so awkward to know what I want to say to introduce people to the Circle, this version of the page feels the way I want it to feel, which I love.

Also: the weekly updates inside the Circle.

I am so in love with this!? Now that we’ve been doing this for a few weeks and people are starting to settle into the routine of it, the conversations and insights that are coming out of this are amazing.? It makes my heart so happy to see how the Circle members support and encourage each other.

Also, Circle members keep telling me how helpful it is to get these reminders to check in with their dream every week.? I am so glad that I started doing this.

And I often go back in to update my update which I find super helpful and super grounding as the process of learning more about what my dreams need is so non-linear it can be easy to get lost in it, or feel like I’m making less progress than I am.

How do I feel about this?

Really amazing.? My dream feels sturdy and strong.? All the work I’ve been doing recently on expanding capacity is really paying off.? Everything feels so much sturdier and capable of supporting more action.

A few weeks back I shared how my dream was a stream and there was this boulder which then turned into a smaller stone that I’ve been exploring for the past few weeks.? I learned some really cool things in exploring it (I’ve been sharing that mostly in the weekly updates that I post inside the circle, where I do go into more detail on the things I don’t want to share publicly) and then when I finished re-writing the sales page, the stone was gone.? Now the stream sparkles and flows.

What do I need now?

Self-care to stay strong to keep the flow flowing.

Daily bike rides.? Time in nature.? Quiet time for journaling.? Getting lots of sleep.? Being really present in the process of growing into who I am becoming as I grow my dream.? TRUSTING MYSELF TO HAVE THIS.

Space to settle into my newly stretched capacity inside my newly defined boundaries, of being able to hold space for more dreams to come to life.

What does my dream need now?

Right now, my dream is a bouncy ball!? It sparkles with delight.? It wants to ZOOM and BOUNCE.

Watching this sparkle ball ZOOM and BOUNCE in my imagination makes me very happy.? I have so much love for this dream.

I’ll keep exploring what this means, but what it feels like is that ZOOMING and BOUNCING are about being seen in new ways.? Moving into new spaces.? Attracting more attention.? It feels like promotion.? Not promoting the Circle, just promoting the Creative Dream Incubator website and letting people find their way to the magic.

What comes to mind is maybe advertising and some more work with SEO.? I have this one post that get 2,500 NEW people every month coming to it from Google. I’d like to have a few more posts like that.

Taking all this into account, my next mission is:

Keep preparing for the Love your Life Creative Journal Class.? Creating the most amazing classes for the Circle feeds the Circle.

Get the new small group coaching for teachers/healers/coaches/helper-people ready to go.

Explore the bouncing sparkle ball and find out how I can help it ZOOM and BOUNCE.


Update 26: Where Letting Go Of The Goal Brings The Goal Closer To Me

In December 2013 I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.

At this point though, the Circle is steadily growing and I’m not interested in the numbers. I’ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life. And I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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Letting go
Yesterday I wrote about how JOY is a SUPERPOWER.

This is really the sweet spot for me – using what I teach to stretch and grow in new ways.? I am committed to my Circle member’s growth and so I need to be even more committed to my own growth.? If I’m not walking my talk my energy containers don’t work and the magic dries up.? That’s not an option for me.

So in last week’s update I was delighted to find that I already have what I really want, which is 1-2 new members in the Circle most days.? I do want to just marinate in the magic of that, but at the same time the universe is always expanding and we are a part of the universe so if we attempt to stop expanding it gets uncomfortable.? So I want to be fully present in the delight of being where I am while looking forward at what I am growing into next.

I’m going to use the Creative Dream Check-In Journal Prompts from last week for my update.

What happened in the last week?

I’ve been exceptionally happy thanks to my Love Your Life Project, as I prepare for the Love Your Life Creative Journal class.

And I remembered how quickly I grow into things and become comfortable with them.

Two weeks ago I got my bike (!) and everything was new.? I didn’t really know how to lock it.? I didn’t know where to find the best bike paths.? I wasn’t sure about riding in traffic.? I didn’t know how far I can ride – what if I get too tired to make it back home?? I didn’t know that if I rode in the rain while wearing my brand new jacket I just made, that I’d get home with a stripe of rain and gravel up my back.? I didn’t know how to install fenders or a basket.? I didn’t know what to do when I got my first flat.

And now: I know all of those things.? Holy crap!? I’m surprised at how quickly I’ve acclimated to being a cyclist but really – this is what happens when you do something every day and ask questions about the parts you don’t know about.

So I’m thinking about that, and about welcoming 1-2 new members into the Circle every day.? I’m going to acclimate to this and want to increase the flow.

2-3 sounds ok.? 3-4 sounds ok.? 4-5 makes me take a deep breath.? I’m probably not ready for 4-5? new members every single day.

Some quick math shows that 5 per day gets me to well over 1,000 by the end of this year, which is more than what I want.? So no wonder that feels uncomfortable.

It’s not that 4-5 people in a day is too much, when I’m running a class I can get 10 or more in a day.? And I like that!? It’s that 4-5 new people every single day, day after day, feels like too much, energy wise.? It’s too much continual shifting for me to be able to hold the container sturdy and steady.

More math shows that 3 new people a day, from now until the end of the year, would get me to 800.? And 3 is only 1 more than 2 so that’s really not much of a stretch and it feels perfectly comfortable.

Isn’t that funny?? Letting go of the goal brought me closer to the goal.

Last week’s update was all about surrender.? I was feeling so happy about where I am, and letting go of reaching for 800 felt like a relief.?? Now it feels like the 800 are flowing to me with ease and delight!

STICKING WITH IT IS THE BEST.? So much magic happens if you just don’t give up!? Last week I felt like I wanted to let go of my goal but I didn’t stop being in the process – that’s the important part, staying in the process.

Next question: How do I feel about this?

Pretty fucking great!

Except… except something feels kind of off about what I just wrote, the part about how “It’s too much continual shifting for me to be able to hold the container sturdy and steady.”

I do believe I am lying to myself!

Telling the whole truth about how you feel feels different than telling yourself stories that come from your limiting beliefs and fears and doubts and inner critics.

But those stories are so familiar it is SO EASY to go along with them.? Oh yes – I am easily overwhelmed and must hold back on my dreams in order to be safe.

Yes, that’s a lie.? I do know that safety is not created by holding back or playing small.? That kind of safety is an illusion your inner critic tries to fool you into.

So, it’s not true that 4-5 new people in the Circle every day is too much for me.? What does that mean?

When I feel into this story, I can see that its roots are being nourished by my inner critic – desperately trying to hold me back so I can have what it thinks is safe.

So I take this whole scenario and put it into a bubble of love.

And my inner critic puts down her gardening tools and lies down to take a nap.? The gardening tools sparkle and disappear.? The roots shrink up, the story breaks down.? This story can’t live in a bubble of love because it’s not true or loving.

All that remains is the kernel of truth: my inner critic is a worry-wart and she would worry less if I was playing small so she’s always going to encourage me to be smaller because she doesn’t like worrying, even though she is basically an Olympic gold winner at worrying.

And I am left with the truth: Right now I’d prefer 1-3 new members each day.? I don’t need to make up a story about why this is better than 4-5 new members, I can simply love my preference.

This is what I want and I get to have it! I don’t have to have a reason!

Next question: What do I need now?

As I said, I am ridiculously happy thanks to my Love Your Life Project, as I prepare for the Love Your Life Creative Journal class.? It feels like things are flowing.? I need continued permission to relax and enjoy the process.

What does my dream need now?

Well this is interesting.? Last week I shared this:

My dream is a sparkling stream running through a forest.? It?s happy and bubbling.? But it?s got this one boulder it would like to be removed.? Hmmm. What is the boulder?? (that part I?m just going to share in my update inside the Circle)

I’m still exploring that boulder.? What I’ve learned so far is that I don’t need to remove it from the stream.? I just need to move it to somewhere where it would be more useful.? I’m not sure if this means putting it into deeper water, or using it as a stepping stone.? Trusting the complete answer to come in time, but some really helpful ideas have come to me as I’ve been exploring so far.

Taking all of this into account, my next mission is:

Keep doing what I’ve been doing!

And keep exploring this stream/boulder thing to learn more about what this emerging story wants to tell me.

I’d like to have a stream of MIRACULOUS PRODUCTIVITY happen so I can get my stuff done quick and make some time to explore a new idea that came to me this week, about doing some small group coaching program, working only with teachers/coaches/healers/helper-peoples to strengthen their superpowers and help them help more people.

We’ll see what happens there.


Creative Journal Prompts For Staying On Track With Your Dreams

Creative Journal Prompts For Staying On Track With Your Dreams

I know taking the time to do these creative dream updates EVERY WEEK is deeply, deeply helpful.

And now that we’re doing these updates inside the Circle so everyone has a chance to participate, I’ve been thinking about the format of the updates and how to set it up so it’s easy enough to stay in the habit of doing it and also so that we’re doing it in the most helpful way.

The purposes of the updates:

  • so you don’t drop the many (many!) ideas and insights you find along the path
  • so you’re clear on WHICH ideas to act on RIGHT NOW
  • marking the path so you notice sooner if you’re just going in circles (more common than you’d think, on the Creative Dream Path)
  • acknowledging the many (many!) steps you’ve taken, which makes it much easier to contemplate how many steps are still in front of you
  • holding yourself accountable to your dream
  • reflecting on what’s happened as a way of learning from it and as a way of noticing things you didn’t notice while it was happening
  • documenting the process of bringing one dream to life show you all sorts of clues about how to work with other dreams
  • sweet sweet sweet delicious clarity about where you are and where you want to be and how you want to get there (this changes a lot more often than you’d think, holding onto clarity is difficult but important)

I’ve come up with these Creative Journal Prompts For Staying On Track With Your Dreams

It’s in two parts.

Part 1 is for when you’re setting out, so it’s your first update.?

But it’s also good to revisit it every week to see if it’s changing, because if it doesn’t fill you with delight to say what you want and why you want it – something has changed and you need to adjust.

Checking in with these three statements every week and making any necessary adjustments so that you remain filled with delight about this will keep your dream process calibrated in the right direction.

My dream is:

I want it because:

When I have it I will feel:

Part 2 is 4 questions to ask yourself every week, plus a mission statement.

What happened in the last week?

How do I feel about this?

What do I need now?

What does my dream need now?

Taking all of this into account, my next mission is:

Remember that moving forward is not always the answer.

In fact, there is no “forward” on the Creative Dream Path.? The path does not exist until you build it.? You build in the direction that feels right in the moment.

Most Creative Dream Paths go in spirals and if you’re not grounded and present in your process, you’ll think you’re going backwards.

So for my update this week I’m starting at the beginning.

My dream is: I can no longer say that my dream is to have 800 members in the Circle this year, because that doesn’t fill me with delight right now.? But it was the perfect starting point for this adventure in learning how to grow my capacity as a teacher.

What fills me with delight now: growing the Circle in a grounded and sustainable and DELIGHTFUL way.

To be more specific about what feels grounded and sustainable and delight to me right now: at least 30 new members each month, but not more than 50.? One or two per day is perfect.

I want it because: I’m so in love with everything I have learned about making dreams real and it really really makes me happy to share it.? I love the way people’s lives start to change once they join the Circle.? I love how it spreads HAPPINESS.? I am so happy I could burst at the thought that I am bringing this amazing thing to the world.

It feels like perfect alignment with purpose and heart and creativity and spirit.? It’s what I’m here to do.

Of course, the same could be said about my coaching practice.? But coaching takes a LOT of energy and running the Circle does not take as much.? So another thing I love about the Circle is that I can run the Circle without working full time.? This feels important not because I want to work part time (I love my work too much for that) but because I want the option to be able to do that if something happens and I need some time off.? I live alone and don’t have anyone to help with the bills (and am not interested in changing that), so building this kind of stability into my business feels important for the long term.

When I have it I will feel: This one is interesting, because right now I do have it.? 1-2 people join the Circle most days.? And right now I am super happy.? What I want is to sustain this over time and become more grounded in it.? Then I will feel more grounded and stable as the Guardian of Dreams.

And on to this week’s update:

What happened in the last week?

As I said in part 1, there are 1-2 new people joining the Circle most days and I really like this!? Before it was more larger clusters right before a new class started and I do much prefer have this small, steady stream.? It gives me a chance to get to know them a bit (if they choose to be chatty on the Circle website, lots of people prefer to stay quiet and that’s fine too!).

We started the Inspiration Cards class and it’s going even better than I’d hoped.? Members are having these delightfully healing experiences encountering the World of Inspiration and I am having so much fun hearing what they’re all up to.

I don’t think I can explain enough how much I love this group of people and their dreams.

The big thing that happened in the past week is my new customer service software.? I wrote here about boundaries and changes.? The past few months I’ve been increasingly overwhelmed with the amount of stuff coming at me.? Now I feel like I have room to breathe (and play! and create!) again.? It’s all sunshine and rainbows and setting things up in ways that support me in doing the work I am here to do.

How do I feel about this?

Everything feels on track and happy.? A part of me wants to hold onto the original dream I had for 800 members this year.? That part of me is small and young and thinks that it’s not ok to change her mind.

Wise me knew all along that I can set my intention and do my part but I do not control the timing.? Wise me knows that the work I did earlier this year of stretching into my goal was important inner work and will serve me well and that I am not giving up on anything, I’m moving in the direction my heart is sending me in.

Slow, steady growth is my style. I feel really comfortable and supported and happy.

What do I need now?

I’m feeling comfortable and supported and happy.? A lot of this is the new class I’m working on, the Love Your Life Creative Journal Class.? To create the container for the class, I start working with the energies of it ahead of time. Working directly with loving your life and being happy now is pretty amazing.

So all I need for next week is to keep doing what I’ve been doing.

What does my dream need now?

My dream is a sparkling stream running through a forest.? It’s happy and bubbling.? But it’s got this one boulder it would like to be removed.

Hmmm. What is the boulder?? (that part I’m just going to share in my update inside the Circle)

Removing the boulder won’t make the stream stream faster or anything it will just help it stream steadier.

Taking all of this into account, my next mission is:

Keep exploring the boulder and find out more about what it means and what I need to do to remove it.? Keep working/playing with the Love Your Life Creative Journal Class.

Wow, that feels light and do-able.


 

Update 24: How About We Just Be Happy Now?

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.? (you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I’m not interested in the numbers.? I’ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life.? And now I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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how about we just be happy now

I turned 40 last Sunday.? My mom posted a bunch of old photos of me on her Facebook, it was so amazing to see them again!

I kept looking at this one and remembering how much I loved gymnastics, especially cartwheels.? I want to draw this part of me out, into my regular life, more often.? And it feels like I’ve been doing that – I got a bike for my birthday!? And after not riding for 20 years, I am finding that riding a bike is a really special kind of delight.

I feel like I need 16 updates to talk about everything that happened this week.

I am really in love with this process, of writing an update every week.? At one point it was feeling weird, like who cares?? But once I started sharing these updates in the Creative Dream Circle and creating space for everyone else to share their updates too – it turned into pure magic.?

Writing out a weekly update, even if it’s just in your journal, if a very good dream habit to get into! ?And I did end write a whole separate update this week, all about boundaries and re-arranging things, which I’m going to post next week, not as an update post but as a regular post.

This week so many things happened. We started a new class in the Circle, which I am super happy about. It’s always amazing to see how people interact with the material.

The longer I do this work, the better I get at creating classes which are actually containers for people to get exactly what they need right then, to realise something important or have a healing or find a new dream or whatever. I’m really proud of that and grateful that there are so many amazing people to play with this stuff in the Circle.

I’m feeling a strange mix of more committed than ever to my goal, and feeling like I understand my goal and what it will take to get there clearer than ever, and also feeling a sense of letting go and also a sense of total fuzziness about it. It’s also feeling less and less important, the more I explore it.

Notice how I’m referring to it as a goal and not a dream.

Goals are different from dreams. Solid, clear and external. It’s very black I and white – you achieve your goal or you don’t. Goals are very helpful things to have.

A dream though, is purpose and delight and spirit and authenticity and moving towards who you really are and stepping into your superpowers and love and bliss and wonder and magic. Goals are head. Dreams are heart.

Eight hundred members in the Creative Dream Circle is a goal. And it’s a fine goal. But right now I want to explore the dream. Where’s the light and the magic? What does my heart want?

My heart wants to do what I love and to be making enough money to live comfortably. Oh. I have that.

My heart would like permission to ignore my goal.

My head says that’s stupid. My head reminds me heart how delicious what I’m doing in the circle actually is, how it’s changing peoples lives and how needed it is. My head wants my heart to know that all of this gets bigger as the circle gets bigger.

My heart says yes, it’s delicious. Now in the present. And what if we weren’t trying to make to grow? What if we just give it sunlight and water and love and I let it grow itself?

So that’s where I am with this. I don’t know that letting it grow itself would result in me doing anything differently than I have been doing, it seems like it’s just a different attitude.

I’m feeling a strong desire to get to know this dream in a new way.? Or maybe I’m just tired of holding this and need to it down for just a little bit.

In other explorations, I discovered a whole new understanding about my role as a Guardian of Dreamers. And I am learning about what I need to be the best Guardian of Dreamers that I can be: Delight! Happiness! To Be In Love With My Life!?

Things are shifting, that’s for sure. I always lose my sense of clarity when things are shifting. Experience shows that something amazing will come next, so I’m looking forward to that.


Your Next Steps: A journaling + meditation class to help you be more CLEAR and SURE of your next steps