Let’s talk about shame

You cannot wholeheartedly pursue your dreams if you are avoiding your feelings. Any feelings.

You also cannot be wholeheartedly pursuing your dreams and not end up in situations that CAUSE the kinds of feelings we’d all rather avoid.

(There are three different videos “for when you’re disappointed” in the library of tools you get with​ Dream Book​ - because disappointment is a place we land in so often on this path)

With everything that’s been happening in my life, I’ve been making more time than usual for processing my feelings.

And I’ve been practicing “extra-good” physical self care to help my body process all of these feelings.

Lately some of my feelings have felt way bigger than me, like they are too big and too heavy to process. Like all I can do is try to avoid them or let them crush me.

It’s so easy in those moments to forget that there’s another option. And it’s so easy to believe the story about how the feeling is too much for me, which is my resistance talking.

Late last week I noticed I was REALLY in my head.

I was caught in this story about my divorce that kept going in circles and making me feel more and more agitated.

Finally I said - “Hey wait a minute… where is feeling in my body?”

Which brought me out of my head and into my feelings. Then I was like “Oh. THIS is why I’ve been stuck in my head. This feeling is too much.”

But I stayed with it and in a few minutes, I knew this feeling was shame.

It was heavy and sticky.

And it feels so gross to feel it.

And it feels kind of slippery and like a snake, like it can slither beneath the surface and become easy to not notice anymore. (Which is resistance)

And it’s so tempting to let it do that!

But what it does beneath the surface is so damaging.

And as hard as it is to feel it, that’s the way to process it, that’s the way to move through it, that’s the way to truly be free of it.

Unfelt shame will keep healing just out of reach. It will make dreams very vague and uncertain.

It will make any kind of positive change seem impossible. It will keep you in your head and it will see you reacting to what’s happening around you instead of creating the things you are here to create.

Feeling shame is nothing to be ashamed of.

We all feel it. Just like every other feeling.

And, living in this world where we are taught and encouraged to pretend we are robots with no feelings, it’s really common to have rivers of unfelt shame flowing in our inner worlds. Just like we have self doubt, fear, and all sorts of other uncomfortable feelings.

Learning to avoid these feelings is often rewarded in our culture, but you can’t get at your MAGIC with that approach.

Nov 15: Centered, Grounded Present

This is a 90 minute zoom class where we’ll do an alchemy meditation together to practice BEING centered, grounded and present. And then talk about the things that make this hard, the things that make this easier, and make plans for finishing the year feeling the ways we want to feel.

Not by AVOIDING the ways we actually feel.

Making space to feel your actual feelings is a practice that supports the practice of calling in the feelings you want to feel.

BEING centered, grounded and present is a thing you can practice. Just like you can practice joy, calm and inspiration.

It’s a part of the larger work of PRACTICING our creative dreams.

PRACTICING becoming who we really are.

I hope you’ll join me on Nov 15 for the live Zoom, or the replay (you can leave comments while you watch and if you have questions I’m there to answer).

Get the call details here (Dream Book members only)

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Dream Book members:

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Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Upcoming calls: Centered Grounded Present. Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024

Note: This is a post about my daily practice with my Creative Dreams - in these posts I often link to the tools, courses and processes I use which are only available to Dream Book members. If you're not a member, find out more + join us here.