Me Who Rests vs Me Who Leaps Ahead

Every Monday morning I take my business out for coffee with this Creative Genius Planning Session tool that I made.

This tool has served me well.? Very well.

It means for the rest of the week I can just dive into what feels most inspiring in the moment.

Everything keeps flowing towards more of what I want and love because I have this Genius Plan.

But this Monday Morning was different.

This morning I was really short on energy.? I had one post-yoga bubble of sunshiny energy and then it just kind of faded away.? And by the time I got to the coffee shop for my Monday Morning Creative Genius Planning Session I needed a Very Large Latte just to get started.

monday morning creative genius planning session
Monday Morning Creative Genius Planning Session + Giant Latte

And here’s the thing.

This morning I’m in a low energy kind of space.? And it feels like I need some quiet time.

And the intuitive messages I am getting from my business are that it needs some space.? To just be.

But I have this thing I’m working on.

This thing I am totally excited about and inspired about.

This Thing I Want To Share With You, Like, Right Now.

I’m not good at holding things in.? Or waiting.? When I’m inspired – I leap.

So here I am at my Monday Morning Creative Genius Planning Session:

Inspired and wanting to leap

Also tired and wanting to rest.

This is a pretty common thing for me.

There is a part of me that is pretty much always excited about something and wanting to move forward with it.

There is a part of me that pays attention to and honours the natural cycle of life and wants to rest when it’s time to rest, play when it’s time to play and work when it’s time to work.

So here is what happened when these two parts collided this morning:

(MWR = me who rests.? MWLA = me who leaps ahead)

MWLA: I’m going to put this sparkly new exciting thing out there next week, so this week we have to do all of these things to get it ready.? Plus, of course, we want to re-write all of week four for the Creative Journal Magic e-Course.

MWR: Agreed on week four for the Creative Journal Magic e-Course.? Not a re-write but edit and make a lot of changes.? That’s really the only focus for this week.? That other thing – that has to wait.? Working on that now is not in keeping with the energy of where we’re all at this week.

MWLA: But I want to do it!

MWR: We all want to do it!? How about we do it one week later though?

MWLA: A WHOLE WEEK?? YOU WANT ME TO WAIT A WHOLE WEEK?? ARRRRRGGGGHHH? NOOOOO!

MWR: What is really so bad about waiting?

MWLA: I hate waiting.? I hate resting.? I want to DO.? I made this amazing thing!? I want to share it!? OMG LET ME SHARE IT!!!!!

MWR: Yes but what about sharing it one week later?? What would actually happen if you waited one week?

MWLA: I’d have to rest this week.

MWR: And?

MWLA: Oh.? I guess I want to leap ahead because it’s more comfortable than slowing down and being present with what is.? Mmmmmmmmm.? Something here scares me.? And if I slow down it’s bound to catch up with me.

MWR: What do you think that could be?

MWLA: The usual stuff.? What if everything falls apart.? What if people don’t like me.? Blah blah blah.? I’m kind of tired of all that bullshit and I’d like to just carry on.

MWR: See, I think carrying on kind of magnifies everything.? Ignoring fears does not transform them.? It leaves them there, beneath the surface, where they can grow and wreak havoc.

MWLA: I know you’re right but I wish you weren’t.

MWR: Remember what happened earlier this month?

MWLA: Deliberately stopping and being with all of that annoying bullshit actually propelled us forward, closer into what we want.? I thought that was a one time thing, I didn’t agree to doing that all the time.

MWR: Not all the time. Only when it’s needed.

MWLA:? Arrrgh!? Do you know how annoying you are?? Only when it’s needed?? Who decides?

MWR: I think you can feel it too, that it is needed.? If it wasn’t you’d have the energy you need to go ahead and do what you want to do.? Also what about trusting in divine timing?? When has anything good ever come out of pushing ahead and doing things on your own terms instead of being in the flow?

MWLA: It could happen one of these times!? If I stop pushing.? OMG.? If I stop pushing and leaping ahead WE WILL STAGNATE.

MWR: So resting = stagnation?

MWLA: I guess not always.? But too much resting is definite stagnation.

MWR: Do you really think we are anywhere near stagnation?

MWLA: It’s just that I have all of these dreams and things I want and how will I ever get them all by resting?

MWR: How will you ever enjoy them all by not resting?

MWLA: You are so annoying!

MWR: I understand how important your creative dreams are to you.? They’re important for me too.

MWLA: We’re on the same page?? We want the same thing??? I always forget that part.? I always think you are like the grown up trying to keep me doing “The Right Thing” and keep me from having fun.

MWR: No. I don’t want to keep you from having fun.? And I don’t want to make you do stuff you don’t want to do.? But I do want to slow down and challenge your assumptions about constantly leaping ahead.? I want to be more rooted in purpose in a broader sense than you sometimes see.? We simply cannot always leap ahead just like we cannot always rest.? I have no interest in staying in the same place.? I have on interest in not making all of our dreams real.

MWLA: It’s like I’m the motor and you’re the steering wheel.

MWR: Yes!? I appreciate how your energy and enthusiasm propels us forward when that’s the right thing to do.

MWLA: And I appreciate how you’re looking out for the bigger picture and guiding us along.? We are doing amazing.? I’m sorry I make it so hard for you.? I’m just SO EXCITED, you know?

MWR: I do know.? And I’m excited too.

So it looks like I’m going to move slower than I want to this week.

It’s 11am.? Usually Monday mornings are full of action here in the Creative Magic Art Room.? But this Monday morning – all I can think about is taking a nap.

Your Next Steps: A journaling + meditation class to help you be more CLEAR and SURE of your next steps