Update 34: The Magic of Jealousy

jealousyLast week’s Treasure Mapping class has left it’s mark on me.

The way I teach dreaming, every move you make with your dream is an act of healing.? Working with your dream brings you deeper into who you really are.

False identities and limiting beliefs dissolve as you allow more of who you really are to shine through.? This is the path to the dream – becoming the you who lives the dream, from the inside out.

I’m in the middle of a big step with that, and a lot of things are changing for me.? Writing these weekly updates is one of the things that’s changing.

As you start to grow into the you who lives your dream, your perspective on things changes – these updates were grounding and helpful for me before and now they feel superfluous.

Thing 1: this doesn’t feel like “the BIG dream” anymore because I see it in reach.? Regardless of how long it takes to get there, I feel like I’m in the boat and the current is bringing me in.? And I can paddle, or turn on the motor, or just go with the flow – whatever I want.? Right now I’m lying in the boat, staring up at the clouds because I love clouds.

I’m enjoying the journey and excited about the destination.

Thing 2: in the last six months I’ve grown a lot.? I’ve done a lot of work to shift my perspective around growing my business, I’ve explored all sorts of new things.? I’ve met new fears and tangoed with old ones.? I’m not the same person who made the decision to start writing these updates.

Thing 3: a new dream is emerging which is all about how I’m relating to my dreams right now.

So I want to share in a different way.

At first, I was writing these updates to help me sort out my steps, and to share the process publicly because I think too few people do that – share the honest actual story as it’s happening.? When you look back and share – that changes the story.

Now it’s become less of a broadcast (me telling my story) and more of a circle (using my updates to open up the weekly sharing circle inside the Creative Dream Circle) and the big magic comes from everyone sharing their stories together.

And next I want the way that I’m approaching the updates to change.? But my idea of how I want to do this differently is so new I’m not ready to share it.

The magic of JEALOUSY

Instead, I’ll share that I have been incredibly jealous of someone lately.

Also inspired by them and happy for them but also very much jealous.? And I forgot that jealousy is an important tool in your creative dreamer toolkit.

(If jealousy is something you struggle with click that link!)

When I finally listened to my jealousy of course it was saying – hey dude, why don’t YOU do the thing that you are jealous that they are going to do?

When I talked to the friend I was jealous of, it turns out that he wasn’t sure he wanted to do the thing anyway.? It was me, wanting him to do the thing.? And he thought it was an ok idea but he was inspired by other things.

It was mine all along.

(Original stained glass art mosaic by my mom – one of many in her garden)

This makes me happy, and also afraid, because the thing I want to do is new, and would stretch me in new ways, and that’s always scary (at least in the beginning).

I spent the day at the beach by myself yesterday.

That is my favourite place to work on acclimating to my dream.? I went there because I felt like I had a lot of acclimating to do, and then it turned out that I didn’t.

I just needed to recognize how much I’ve grown into this dream already.? And notice how I ready I am to keep going.? And how capable I am of figuring out ways to do this that nurture and support both me and my dreams.

This feels really good.