Life is happening FOR me, not TO me

This is the mantra I got in this week’s Dream Book journaling + alchemy kit: Life is happening FOR me, not TO me

This is one of these mantras that comes with a GIANT CAVEAT. If it doesn’t feel hopeful, don’t use it.

It’s very easy for this to turn into a way of blaming YOU for the ways the world has failed you. It can erase the impacts of systems of oppression. It can make you feel like the most horrific things that happened to you were your fault.

AND, only when it feels right, it can help re-frame difficult things and put you into a more empowered place.

I have been thinking along these lines about my divorce, which I did not choose, or see coming, but now, with 8 months hindsight, I am starting to say - yes, this happened FOR me.

There are parts of me who are still “FUCK THAT, no this didn’t happen FOR me” and that’s valid.

The part I am exploring is the part of me that feels curious about this, and curious to explore the ways this divorce benefits me.

When it feels right, it’s SO helpful.

It’s alse SO helpful to look at our dreams-that-just-stay-stuck-no-matter-how-hard-we-work through this lense.

Not to deny the hard parts or invalidate your feelings about the hard parts. Just to make some space for the part of you who can find the gifts in it.

Life is so multi-faceted. And dreams are WILDLY multi-faceted.

There ARE ways that it absolutely sucks that you don’t already have the thing you want and maybe there are also ways that it’s good that it’s happening exactly how it’s happening?

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Life is happening FOR me, not TO me

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