I took myself out for coffee to do a coaching session with myself because doing this at home… I’d be more likely to just walk away. I am having a lot of resistance. 

When I specifically go somewhere with my journal, to work on a specific thing - I am so much more likely to actually DO IT. So this is one way I work through my resistance.

Today, I wanted to coach myself about how I feel like I am flailing about a lot and don’t really have my shit together.

I sat down. Looked through my journals and my project management app to get this overview of what I’ve been wanting to do and what I have been doing.

And this is the thing: I am doing just fine.

I FEEL LIKE I am just flailing about sometimes and I FEEL LIKE I need to get my shit together.

And I let that feeling take over.

And I listened to what it has to say as though it is true.

When what is true is that I FEEL this way, which means this feeling needs to be TENDED TO and not OBEYED.

Like, this feeling has me believing that there is a way to organize myself where I always feel like I know exactly what I am doing and I always “have it together”.

Well.

That leaves no space for creativity, growth or healing.

Which are inherent parts of my work. And any creative work. And any soul work.

My coach self is like “There’s nothing to coach here, we just need to accept that we feel how we feel and make some space for that”

My self with all the feelings is like “No, we need to come up with more structure so that I never have to feel this way”

A hand on heart for all the inner selves who want to change the outer world so they never have to have their feelings.

So where can we find the balance between:

Having space for healing, creativity and growth. Having space to BE IN and FOLLOW my own process…

AND…

Having structure that helps me know/remember what I am doing?

Ok just writing that out I can see that this is kind of a nonsense question. I mean maybe that would be a fruitful thing to explore but it feels like I am searching for something that can't exist and perhaps wasting the time I do have for creativity...

A more interesting question would be: What do I really WANT when I say I want to feel like I have my shit together? What does this mean, exactly? How would it feel? What would my life look like? .... Are there some unreasonable expectations buried here?

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

It’s just above zero and I took a 20 minute bike ride to meet a friend for coffee. I’m wearing all things I made: a hoodie dress, puffer vest and trench coat. I am cozy, warm and colourful (once I take off my coat).

Sewing has been such an important form of creative self expression and creative self care for me for the last two years. 

One of the first things I did when my husband left me was sew this trench coat. I already had the pattern and fabric sitting there, and I remember deciding to really dive in. Working through all of the details of it were a really nice distraction from the stress. And watching it come together was so satisfying.

Then, I was feeling like with so much changing in my life… I wanted new clothes. I was becoming a new version of myself and this version didn’t want to only wear my old self’s clothing, it wanted some new things.

My pace slowly picked up that year, and for this last year I have been on what can only be described as a sewing BINGE. I’ve averaged almost one new thing every week.

And this includes BIG projects: a winter coat, two raincoats, a nightgown with sewn-in ultra comfy bralette, two hooded robes and three elaborate ruffled dresses, jeans, cargo pants - and also lots of small projects like t-shirts, sweatpants, hoodies and simple dresses.

And now, putting on clothes I made just feels… healing. I created these things with careful thought to my comfort and needs and self-expression.

Yes, my life fell apart. Yes, a marriage is a dream and sometimes dreams fall apart. I didn’t choose to be in the process of creating a whole new life while also struggling with perimenopause while the world descends into fascism all around me, but here I am.

I was lucky enough to grow up with a mom who sewed a lot of my clothes. I have had a dream of sewing all of my clothes since I as 16 years old and made myself a very simple dress that I LOVED. Two years later I decided to choose to go to university for fashion design, but that actually leaves very little space to sew your own clothes. 

But I was in my late 30s before I was consistently sewing clothes for myself that I loved. It took that long before I had the combination of time, space, equipment and money to throw at this. 

And since then, I have only gotten better at it. Each new project helps me better understand what works for me, so these days, and for the last eight years at least, I don’t make a lot of duds. Before that - it wasn’t that uncommon to spend the time and money on a fabric and pattern and have the garment be kind of (or a lot!) disappointing.

Creativity is generative. When we can find the smallest ways in, being in the process will grow us and change everything.

Fashion is an arena where it’s hard to find really SMALL ways in, and In hindsight of course I could have looked for ways to start smaller which probably would have made it easier to get to the bigger project of consistently sewing garments that turn out like I’d hoped much sooner.  

I am happy with my journey as it was AND looking to learn from it.

For the things I want to do next: where can I find smaller ways in, so I can get into the generative healing qualities of being in the creative process sooner?

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

My blog is where I share my on Creative Dream Alchemy practice. All of the tools I use are in the Creative Dream Incubator membership and I link to them often in my blog posts. Only membership members will be able to access the tools. If you're not a member yet - join us here!

On Fridays I do these "Dream Status Report" prompts to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path.

There are journaling sheets for doing this! These are available for everyone, not just membership members. Download them here.

I've been mentioning them every week, but I still want to start with a little plug for: Habits Upgrade + Structure, Habits Routines in the membership. I am ridiculously grateful to make some habit changes that are helping me in so many ways.

This week I gave myself more SPACE.

I have a few things I am working on - the Goodbye 2025, Hello 2026 journal is getting an update over last year. I am still figuring out a live call to go with it and how that fits with starting Dream Book 2026 on January 1.

When I meditate with the souls of the things it all feels good, like they feed each other, but then out of the meditation, here in the "real world" I am not quite sure what to do. I don't see how the logistics quite fit.

 

THIS MEANS I NEED MORE TIME FOR DREAM WORK. This does not mean I am doing anything wrong or need to pressure myself to figure it out.

When you know what you want to do, and you're NOT feeling afraid/doubt/tangled up in some way... but you still haven't quite do the thing... this means you need more Dream Work before you can get into the Outer Work. This is Creative Dream Alchemy.

(When you ARE feeling tangled, of course Inner Work is what you need to focus on)

 

How do I feel about this/What am I learning: Last week I wrote: I feel like I am making space to go DEEPER into the Creative Dream Incubator.  And that's what I did this week which is... awkward. I'm not in charge of the process! I am listening. What I am mostly learning here is that I need to keep slowing down to do this next part. Remember Slow the Fuck Down! BE as Powerful, Creative + Magnetic as you ARE call?  That magic is still sinking in for me.

What do I need now: Writing this out, suddenly I'd like to sketch out a timeline of how I see these two programs interacting over the months of December and January. I feel like "I can't believe I haven't done that yet" and "this is so obvious" but the obvious answers don't always make themselves known right away.

What does my dream need now (using the Dream Lab alchemy process): My dream showed up as a four leaf clover, and the Field of Creative Dream Alchemy was a rainbow that curled around me. It felt like a BLESSING from my dream and I am just holding onto that good energy.

Taking all of this into account my focus for next week is: Sketch out what I'd like December and January to look like in terms of Goodbye 2025 Hello 2026 and Dream Book 2026. Use this to get a plan in place for what needs to happen in November to have that ready.

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

 

 

This is from the alchemy meditations in Late Stage Capitalism Update to the Creative With Money program.

This is brave and powerful work. You may not feel brave or powerful.

I say this in each of the meditations in the Late Stage Capitalism Update.

This program is so healing and so needed. The way money functions in the world has changed so dramatically, we need to update our inner relationship with the soul of money, clear out what needs to be cleared out, make space for the healing that is needed, and set new intentions for our money lives.

So I say this in the meditation:s: This is brave and powerful work. You may not FEEL brave or powerful for a few reasons:

1. This IS brave and powerful work and often we don’t recognize that.

We can feel like our relationship with money is a mess and so we need help and fail to recognize what a POWERFUL MOVE it is to do this work.

Like - we really don’t give ourselves enough credit for how consistently we show up for healing and growth. So I want to give you credit.

2. And also to remind you that engaging with your healing and your relationship with money is POWERFUL.

Small acts can yield big shifts.

3. This is sacred work and should be acknowledged as such.

And then I also want to say… it’s ok to feel how you feel!

You can FEEL afraid and powerless, that doesn’t change that you are BEING brave and powerful.

You can feel exactly how you feel and in fact, validating and allowing your actual feelings will help you work through them.

All the forms of healing that ask you to “focus on the positive” do such a huge disservice in that way, leaving all of your uncomfortable feelings trapped inside you.

It’s ok to have a lot of feelings about where you’re at with money. It makes sense.

You deserve to have some support with that.

If you haven’t yet, I want to encourage you to explore the Late Stage Capitalism Update to Creative With Money. 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

On a recent group call we had THREE people share the same kind of story.

It was about how they had tried to do a thing, it didn’t work, it was kind of a mess, and they stayed in the mess of it, they kept showing up for calls with me, THE MESS GOT BIGGER, they kept using the creative dream incubator tools, THE MESS REMAINED, they kept engaging with their creativity and intuition and healing and… finally the mess turned into the way through.

This is how it happens. This is the alchemy.

So often, outside of the membership, I see people get really excited about something, build up their confidence, make a plan, do the thing… have it go badly and turn into a mess… and then they step back.

It’s like they think it will get easier if they stop for a bit?

Stopping is the only wrong move to make when it comes to your dreams.

You can make mistakes, move in the wrong direction, turn one little mess into a huge flaming dumpster fire of messes… that’s fine as long as you keep showing up, keep moving.

(Which isn’t to say REST and NOURISHMENT and finding the pace that is not overwhelming to you are not a part of the process, they are! But STOPPING and RESTING are totally different vibes)

Creative Dreaming is not a linear path. It’s an alchemical journey. Your participation, fuels the journey.

Keep showing up.

I am SO PROUD of the culture we have inside the membership where we keep showing up, mess and all. And we don't judge each other's messes. It's a safe space to be in the mess.

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

I'm writing this because I have been TAP DANCING around my next steps lately instead of taking them 😉 

When you don’t feel ready, it means:

You are wrong about what your next step is (you’re not ready for the step you are looking at, but you are ready for the step that is actually the right next step)

AND/OR

You need to sit with your fears and doubts some more to get all parts of you on board.

It’s simple.

When it feels complicated, that means you’re listening to the wrong (inner or outer) voices.

What to do, exactly:

If you’re feeling ready to do the thing: Do the Dream Lab OR the Dream Self meditation - whichever feels right for you.

In the meditation, show your Dream, or your Dream Self your plan. Ask if this is the right step for you to take. Notice what happens. Something in how they respond or how you feel or the general vibe of the meditation WILL give you a clue. It may take more than one time doing this to get a full sense of what is next.

Remember that Creative Dreaming is not linear, it’s an alchemical process. The next right step may be really surprising - listen to your dream, not your logical mind.

If you’re feeling afraid, uncomfortable or just don't know WHY you are not doing the thing: Use the Un-Sticking Station. This is DEEP healing, transformation and miracle work. Give it time. It will ALCHEMIZE your feelings into the thing you need for your next step.

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

On Fridays I do these "Dream Status Report" prompts to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path.

There are journaling sheets for doing this! These are available for everyone, not just membership members. Download them here.

I've been mentioning them every week, but I still want to start with a little plug for: Habits Upgrade + Structure, Habits Routines in the membership.

Every week I am a little more settled into new habits that really work for where I am now (which are so different from the habits I started this year with!) and I continue to be so grateful.

This week surprised me.

On Monday I was planning and doing some Year of Hope journaling and... I got the idea to ask hope how it wanted me to plan my week.

Hope was immediately SO CLEAR AND SURE.

Hope wanted me to focus on one particular thing instead of the two main things I wanted to focus on.

"Get it done!" Hope said.

I thought that wasn't really possible to get it DONE, even if I put the other project aside for a week.

But I thought I'd give it a try and... I got it done!

Somehow hope could see what I couldn't: that working on the two projects at once was making things harder for me.

This is NOT always true.

And sometimes even when it is true, we don't have a project we can just put on hold.

But this week, I could put the other one on hold and it did work and WHOA. I am so happy with the work I did and that I have so much space this week for the other project.

I keep learning how to work within my current capacity, which is smaller than it's ever been.

Or... it FEELS smaller than it's ever been. I think it's just CHANGING.

So much is changing in my relationship with productivity.

I am still taking this course with Dra. Rosales Meza and doing a lot of re-thinking around decolonizing how I do things. While I have been intentionally working on decolonizing my work since 2016, there are still so many layers to it, especially in how I treat myself, my creativity and my productivity.

I am VERY excited to be exploring all of this.

How do I feel about this/What am I learning: I feel like I am making space to go DEEPER into the Creative Dream Incubator.  Dream Book 2026 is going to be such a sturdy container for holding space for the ALCHEMY of dreaming, that I am going to surprise myself with what I dream of next.

What do I need now: To remember that STAYING INSIDE MY CAPACITY is actually a magical thing, not a punishment for arriving at middle age, which is how it has felt at times. There are new things becoming possible here and I am just starting to see them.

What does my dream need now (using the Dream Lab alchemy process): It asks me told on tight, it's taking me on an adventure.

Taking all of this into account my focus for next week is: Hold on to the dream, let go of my ideas about what it even is. Give it space to grow.

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

This is from the DREAMING with the Soul of Money meditation from Module 2 of the new Late Stage Capitalism Update to the Creative With Money program. DO NOT do this one until you've worked with the meditation + journaling kit in module 1 for at least a month. Give the seeds some time to incubate.

I went into this meditation with an expectation of what it would be like to DREAM about money.

My experience was nothing like my expectation. Which felt intense!

The soul of money, still showing up as a kite, unfurled this super long ladder and I climbed up and sat on it.

The soul of money wanted me to dream from it's perspective.

I lay down, looked up at the clouds, and sat with the questions in the meditation...

And even though I was floating in the meditation, I had this physical sensation of sinking. Like sinking into a new realization.

I don't want to dream of MORE. Or DIFFERENT even.

I want to dream of ENOUGH. A deeply felt sensation of enoughness.

Which is not about having so much that I am satisfied! That felt very clear.

It was about feeling like what I have is enough.

This is not possible when you don't have enough, but our culture very powerfully obfuscates the line between "enough" and "not enough" to train us to always want MORE. Capitalism depends on it. At the same time, there are such harsh penalties for not having enough money that of course we always tend to want MORE.

So this sensation of ENOUGH felt like a healing that I can't put into words.

Then, on my second time in there, it's like I went in from the perspective that my deepest, biggest and wildest dream about money is to sink into the sensation of having enough and not wasting any of my time or energy on seeking more...

And this time the dreaming was about EVERYONE having enough.

I live in Winnipeg, Canada but I have been told this is happening in all Canadian cities and likely in lots of other countries as well. People are losing their homes in rapidly increasing numbers. They are on the street, all of the parks near me, except the one that is monitored by security guards, have encampments in them. This is late stage capitalism.

To continue to adhere to capitalism's values is to focus on the individual. Which means recognizing that an increased population of people living on the street puts me in danger, so where can I build walls to protect me?

One reason why the Late Stage Capitalism Update to the Creative With Money program is so SLOW is to give us space to sink into our own values.

I would rather feel safe in my community because everyone has enough, than feel safe because I have some fantastic security system on my home, we've built a wall around the whole condo development, and there are police out everywhere.

While, again, you do need to have enough to meet your needs, after that... abundance is about so much more than how much money you have in the bank.

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

This came up on a recent coaching call.

It was about a business problem.

And this person, when really listening to herself about how she wanted to do things, knew that she wanted to LUXURIATE in the question instead of trying to find the “best” or fastest answer.

HOW we do things matters.

For some reason when it comes to business, the sacred work of offering our gifts to the world, we can feel like we HAVE TO do things… business style. Like we put on a suit and tie and want to follow all of the rules of business world.

There was a whole wave of online business coaches who came along to say… no you can do it different! And then proceeded to just put window dressing on the same old tired business practices. You can call a sales funnel a sacred journey of transformation - but if the nuts and bolts are still the same then you haven’t done anything different.

It’s so engrained in us to follow the rules that even when we are deliberately trying to break free we end up falling in line in so many ways.

We also think that there is A WAY that will get us the results we want, so we go looking outside of us for that way.

When the only way YOU can do it is YOUR way and that answer will only come from inside you.

So LUXURIATING in the questions is often the smartest thing you can do, business wise.

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

I used to use the word mentor instead of witch. Before that it was coach.

Technically, in terms of my training, I am a fashion designer (I know we can think of fashion as being very superficial but it can be our most potent and consistent form of self expression) and a spiritual teacher and counsellor or spiritual practitioner.

I could use the term spiritual practitioner but then I should talk about where I received that accreditation and that’s complicated because I have been distancing myself from it since I started decolonizing my work in 2016.

The training I received was intensely colonial as all new age/new thought/alternative or holistic wellness teachings are, you can't just say "It's not new thought it's ancient wisdom" and that's that. I’ve spent years unlearning the colonial perspective that is so deeply engrained in all of these teachings and all I was left with were disjoined bits of Indigenous teachings, taken fully out of context, placed into a toxic “prosperity gospel” culture that remains wilfully and destructively ignorant of the systems of privilege and oppression we live in which impact us every day.

So I had to re-build a lot of my work and today it is not recognizable as being a part of that lineage.

Using the term spiritual practitioner, for me, plugs into all of these things I have worked to move away from.

Using the term witch, for me, plugs me into my authentic self and ancestral medicine which I am slowly learning more about as I am working with Dra. Rosales Meza. 

Being a witch, professionally, is completely uncertified. Anyone can claim it. 

BUT/AND it is deeply karmic. A witch is accountable for their actions. To put yourself out there as a witch without integrity and honesty will do you more harm than you do to the people you try to swindle.

That feels like where I’m at now. Intentional, powerful and accountable.

Plus I get called a witch all the time anyway.

And when I think “Oh I’m not a witch” what I am thinking is that EVERYONE is magic and if I am a witch so is everyone else…

Which is actually a part of my gifts. I see your magic. I understand how to nurture it and harness it for your dreams.

Not everyone can do that. 

We all have unique ways of using our magic. 

Mine just happens to be to help you get better at using yours, by holding space for the alchemical process that is pursing your dreams… AKA answering your soul’s callings.

And after making this decision I noticed… I have been calling some of my healing circles “community spells” for some time because that most accurately describes the work we do.

I’ve been on my way to this all along.

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

On Fridays I do these "Dream Status Report" prompts to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path.

There are journaling sheets for doing this! These are available for everyone, not just membership members. Download them here.

I am still marvelling in the magic of HAVING more of the habits I WANT!

(Membership resources: Habits Upgrade + Structure, Habits Routines)

Each week I learn a little something new about what supports these habits and implement it... just one tiny baby step at a time.

For example, on weekends I go through my sewing projects and look at what I need to make it easy to pick up and do a few seams throughout the week. On week days I DO NOT have the capacity to take everything out (like it takes A LOT of space to lay out fabric and cut out a pattern) and start a project. But I DO have the capacity to pick up an organized, in-process project and do the next few seams.

This is so small and yet I sewed a whole hoodie dress in a week just a few seams here and there... though this is a hoodie pattern I've sewn many times so it's an easier process. New/challenging patterns are more of a weekend thing but...

Setting up a creative project to make it simple to pick up and do when I don't have a ton of time or energy means I can do more creative projects! Which isn't just about accomplishing things but about making space to do the things that fill the well. A few minutes of sewing just hits different than a few minutes of scrolling.

Also, I have been doing a TON of sewing for the last year. I counted 35 items I made, including some complicated things like a winter coat and nightgown with a super-comfy bralette sewn in.

There are so many other creative project I want to be doing but sewing keeps being the thing I have energy for.

So I am trusting that. The other things are coming AND this sewing is creating the path. I am showing up and doing the thing that is right there and easiest to do.

How do I feel about this/What am I learning: I keep learning how to set things up in my life to make things easier for me. SO grateful for this.

What do I need now: Same as last week: It's so nice to ask this question and feel like my needs are mostly handled. I got this!

What does my dream need now: My dream reminded me that I am taking this course with Dra. Rosales Meza and this is feeding me and my dream in so many ways.

Taking all of this into account my focus for next week is: Keep going, you're doing great.

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!

 

 

This is from the Soul of Money meditation from Module 1 of the new Late Stage Capitalism Update to the Creative With Money program.

Being in the energy field of creative with money felt amazing. I felt deeply supported and ready for something profound…

But when the soul of money showed up as… I didn’t know what. Suddenly it was dark and I couldn't see that well. There was a bit of fabric and… it looked like straw maybe? I just couldn’t tell.

I thought I was doing it wrong. Even though I say in the meditation you can’t do this wrong, which I say because of how easily we FEEL LIKE we are doing it wrong in the moment.

Then I said - no you’re not doing it wrong. This is your experience. Be in it!

That’s when I realized that I was looking at a deflated hot air balloon. Previously when I’d done this meditation, the soul of money was a hot air balloon.

I have actually been in a hot air balloon! So I know what to do with a deflated balloon and basket on the ground. I climbed in (it’s very awkward).

Then I laid down inside the basket.

Then I got it.

The hot air balloon (money) doesn’t do anything on its own. It needs action - someone to light and maintain the fire. And here I am, just laying in the basket.

But it felt very forgiving - like I’ve been laying in the basket for a while and for good reason. I’ve needed to just rest. And if I want this balloon to get back into the air I need to light this fire.

AND

This dovetails with explorations I have been doing about my capacity and HOW I do things.

So I don’t want to light the fire in the ways I have in the past. I don’t want to say to myself that it’s worth any effort to get this thing into the air because once I’m floating I’m floating and I can rest then.

So I just stay laying in the basket and breathing deep and somehow the balloon starts to inflate.

And I just sit with that, and let it sink in...

 

Creative Dream Incubator Coaching Membership members:

Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you're not a member - find out more + join us here!