Manifest your dream life

On being a dream magnet

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. I'll be posting an update here every day (M-F) for the month of August and I'm also doing short videos on Instagram to share things I am learning along the way.\

And check out the new Creative Dream Incubator RedBubble shop! THE MOST encouraging notebooks, zipper pouches, mugs, magnets, stickers + art prints.


What does it mean to be your most magnetic self?

You draw good things to you.

Magnetic implies: you draw in what you ARE. Which, in a world ruled by white supremacy and the patriarchy, goes off the rails pretty fast if it’s the only lens through which you look at the world.

The law of attraction is a spiritual law which operates uniformly, like the law of gravity - is what proponents of the law of attraction teach.

Let’s remember where our teaching about the law of attraction came from.

White settlers in North America, and colonialists in Europe, mostly men. Living in a world where the superiority of white men was taken as fact.

And, feeling superior to everyone, some of these men read the spiritual teachings from around the world and, from their wildly limited perspectives, took out the “gems” of each teaching and collaged them into their own philosophy: New Thought.

This was happening in a culture that didn’t see the difference between “cultural appreciation” and genocide. (And for the most part our culture STILL doesn’t see this)

It was the colonization of Indigenous spirituality. The cherry-picking of ideas, stripped of all context.

And it works for a lot of people. I found it helpful I became a teacher and counsellor in new thought movement.

But I was always looking to figure out: why doesn’t it work equally well for everyone?

This was 15 years ago. It was a time when I didn’t even see the lack of diversity in this community, which, had I see it then, would have given me some clues about why it didn’t work equality for everyone.

One thing that became apparent in my explorations at that time was - the people who avoid their feelings have difficulty manifesting what they really want. And then similarly - the people who get stuck in their feelings have difficulty too.

And so my work has always included emotional processing + intelligence as a big part of it. Over the years I have learned even more how important this is.

And today, with a much greater understanding trauma and external systems of oppression it’s super obvious why the law of attraction can’t work equally for everyone in this world.

And so, in my work with the Creative Dream Incubator, naming these things and the ways they dull our dreams has become an important part of my work. Because this is a part of the work of dismantling external systems of oppression and becoming trauma informed - with the goal that each generation has less trauma than the last, and so dreams become easier and easier for everyone.

Because I always believe that our dreams can save the world. They help show us who we are.

So how do we become more magnetic?

How do you BE a magnet for your dreams?

By engaging with them. By going deeper. By showing up consistently to show your dreams they can trust you. By making space for them to manifest in your life.

These are the things we do in Dream Book, with practices that make it easier to show up for all 3 aspect of this work: Dream Work, Inner Work, Outer Work.

Most of us are out of balance with at least one of these three paths, and so focusing on the one that you are weakest with can make a big difference. Also having practices that make it easier to engage with each of these paths makes a huge difference. You don’t have to re-invent the wheel each time.

How do you FEEL more magnetic?

Argh. Well. Bring this question into your body. What’s your honest reaction to it?

Whatever it is, explore it. That will help find your answer.

Unprocessed feelings are usually in the way of FEELING magnetic. And as long as we are alive, life just keeps giving us more feelings to process!

This is why I teach HAVING A PRACTICE for this work.

Having a consistent safe space for doing this work is a must.

Having INVITING tools is a must.

Having space to be where you are and feel how you feel and not make that wrong, is a must.

Giving yourself time and space and support to grow into your most creative and expansive self is a must.

(This is what we do in Dream Book, you are always welcome to join)

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Being powerful enough to face the fear

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. I'll be posting an update here every day (M-F) for the month of August and I'm also doing short videos on Instagram to share things I am learning along the way.\

And check out the new Creative Dream Incubator RedBubble shop! THE MOST encouraging notebooks, zipper pouches, mugs, magnets, stickers + art prints.

Today I'm back in the tangles. In a very good way.

This week I talked about how doing this work doesn’t necessarily change anything in your outer life - at first. And to be patient with that part, focus on showing up for the practice, and let any change come in it’s own time.

Today I set a totally new boundary with the most difficult person in my life.

I didn’t tell them, because they are hostile and erratic right now, and I know me speaking my truth would set them off. But I have MADE the boundary. I feel it. I am holding it - I am dis-engaging in a way I have never been willing to do before.

This is my most powerful self in action.

Protecting my most creative self, and holding space for her to have what she needs.

This also creates space for my most magnetic self to shine.

I have shied away from really exploring what/who my most magnetic self even means.

I have had a lot of other things to explore. AND I have been avoiding it a bit. And I was writing that part above I realized - ok now is time to look at it.

I didn’t pick the words: creative powerful magnetic.

My dream sent them to me, with this invitation to explore them deeper, and to invite you to explore with me.

I did a 4 year training program to be a spiritual teacher in an organization that teaches the law of attraction. Though at this point that feels like a lifetime ago.

I do understand the law of attraction teachings much better than the average “law of attraction coach”. AND I shy away from “magnetic”.

There are *so many* problematic issues with how the law of attraction is taught, and in the communities that are created around it.

Does that mean I don’t think we can be magnetic AF? No.

And I know that our creative work is especially magnetic. It has the power to draw it’s right people to it.

Still, a part of me feels annoyed with my dream for sending me this word. Another part of me feels sooooo excited to explore it. Another part of me want to be cautious, and figure out some ground rules.

I’m taking this “‘let’s be cautious” me into the Un-Sticking Station.

(This is one of the tools we use in Dream Book. for un-sticking the inner obstacles. I use this one all the time.)

So, hey. I don’t necessarily disagree with being cautious, but you have such a strong “whoa be careful” vibe going on there, I’d love to discuss this. What do you think?

I think we need to be careful.

Sure. What is it that we are being careful ABOUT?

Speaking about “drawing things to you” like a clueless ass. Giving the impression that oppressive systems don’t play a role in how our lives play out, it's all just our thoughts. Supporting the idea that you can spiritual by-pass your way into your dreams, and that if you haven’t done that yet, it’s all your fault because you think wrong. Being super trauma-un-informed and blind about privilege.

Oh yes, I don’t want to do any of those things.

But those things are happening amongst the people who are taking about “being more magnetic”. How will you be different?

By being me.

How is that enough?

It’s not, necessarily, enough. I get that. There are all of these… ways of seeing…. In that whole community and it’s hard to talk about being magnetic with plugging into those ways of seeing. I want to talk about it in a totally different way - which is actually what I DO, when help people plug in deeper to their own power, creativity and wisdom.

But you don’t use words like magnetic out in public. Using this word brings us into new territory.

Yes, but it wasn’t me who picked the world. Our dream picked the word. And we trust our dream, right?

Well. Fuck.

Yeah, I hear that. But can’t do Dream Work with conditions. Partnering with your dream means PARTNERING. Not cherry-picking what parts I want to hear. Not that I have to obey it either, but this doesn’t feel a like a case where I need to push back against my dream. It feels right to explore this. AND a part of it feels scary. So let’s explore WHAT is scary about it more deeply, so we know what to do about it.

It’s just scary to be misunderstood. To be lumped in with something that is against my values.

True. AND every time I write about myself online, I am misunderstood.

Well, yeah. But I think this will be more extreme. And that’s scary.

You’re right. Also I don’t want to write defensively and constantly saying “I’m not talking about ignoring the role privilege plays in manifesting, or victim blaming or spiritual bypassing”

Yeah that’s the other fear. That I can’t write coherently because of that.

OK sitting with this, a new feeling is stirring.

I feel excited to do this. Excited to try anyway, to find a way to talk about “feeling like a dream magnet” without plugging into unconscious privilege or spiritual bypass.

Because it IS easier for people with more intersections of privilege to draw their dreams to them. So we NEED more people with fewer intersects of privilege to become more magnetic for their dreams - because everyone’s dreams are needed and the world is SO lopsided right now.

And I actually now A LOT about this. The tangle is: talking about it IN PUBLIC. Inside Dream Book this is actually what I do every day.

WOW.

This feels completely different right now. I feel energized and inspired.

I bet you anything tomorrow I will write something helpful about FEELING MAGNETIC.

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What would the world look like if we were all BEING as creative, powerful, and magnetic as we ARE?

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. I'll be posting an update here every day (M-F) for the month of August and I'm also doing short videos on Instagram to share things I am learning along the way.\

And check out the new Creative Dream Incubator RedBubble shop! THE MOST encouraging notebooks, mugs, magnets, stickers + art prints.

I created this page in my journal with "Slow the fuck down!" on one side and "BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE" on the other.

Then I freestyle journaled about each one, just giving myself some space to consider everything I think/feel/know about each.

This gave me space to see my whole process from a bird's eye perspective.

I did this a few weeks ago, when I was still mostly exploring all of my layers of reactions to the "slow the fuck down!" part.

What would the world look like if we are all

BEING

as creative, powerful and magnetic as we

ARE?

It wouldn't look like the world does today.

But sometime (always?) when we think about being MORE creative, powerful, magnetic, or other qualities...

We're still thinking about this from within the same paradigm that has us trapped, in some ways.

There are ways that colonialism, capitalism, white supremacy and the patriarchy have infected our ways of seeing ourselves, the world, our possibilities, and what is possible for the world to become.

So, when I think of being MORE creative my brain will begin my looking towards things that would more accurately be described as more PRODUCTIVE.

But it FEELS like more creativity to me.

And it SEEMS like more creativity if I am looking at it using a scale from less art produced to more art produced.

But is that the right scale?

What would a better scale be?

How I FEEL about the art while I'm making it? (getting warmer!)

How I FEEL about the art when I look at it after? (getting colder)

How other people feel about it? (much colder)

How much money I can make from it? (cold)

We all know that there are lots of stupid ways to measure creativity. What's the BEST way?

My immediate answer is: how it feels in my heart. There is a feeling I get when I am making art, and it feels like "THIS is what I am here to DO"

I have never, not once, gotten that feeling from marketing my work. Though I have felt REALLY GOOD about creating sales pages, etc, because it feels good to share the art that I know I am here to make...

Still, it's not the same vibe.

And so of one way of defining MORE creative could mean MORE of that feeling...

Doing more of what generates that feeling...

But that must mean doing less of what doesn't generate that feeling, right?

And how do I do that? Where do I want to create a balance between taking care of the practicalities of my life and giving my time to the things that generate that feeling?

Sitting with all of the questions that this sparks.

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You’re not doing this wrong.

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. I'll be posting an update here every day (M-F) for the month of August and I'm also doing short videos on Instagram to share things I am learning along the way.

For this challenge, I designed mugs, notebooks, magnets and stickers with the "Slow the fuck down. BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE" on them - they are here.

Today my practice is really dull.

I am enjoying this delicious sensation of “having the time to remember what an all-round magical + creative being I am”.

When I meditate on the theme I just feel more YESSSSS.

And I have nothing to journal about other than - this feels so much easier than it did last week. Yay!

It’s boring. And that’s ok.

I just spent my minimum amount of time with this, and now I am going to go on to do what I feel instead and exited about - the Year of Dreams 2023. (As pictured)

The weekly and monthly planners and the planning cutouts (so people who have a planner they like can still use Creative Dream Incubator planning + journaling prompts in their planner) are done! Now I am working on the New Year journaling kit.

So I’m going to share something I wrote last month when I had first started exploring our theme:

You don't need to change yourself.

Spending time journaling and reflecting, especially on the same topic for 30 days (or longer) in a row, may lead you to see things in a new light which leads to changes in your behaviour or new ideas for things to try with your dreams. It does have the potential to change EVERYTHING.

But that "outer change" part is not the goal.

The only goal is to show up for your practice and BE WITH whatever is there for you that day - if that's new ideas or lots of fears and resistance or boredom or... literally whatever is there, that's what you be with.

I believe that at the end of the 30 days you'll know what, if anything, you want to DO with all of this.

Try not to even think about it before then.

Just keep going. Even if it's hard to do because it brings up a lot of uncomfortable questions (like it was for me last week). Even if it's boring (like it is for me right now). Even if it's ______ <-- fill in this blank with whatever reason your mind is giving you for why this is not worth doing.

Just keep going. And each day, journal about how it's going for you.

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Why are we so resistant to slowing down?

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. I'll be posting an update here every day (M-F) for the month of August and I'm also doing short videos on Instagram to share things I am learning along the way.

For this challenge, I designed mugs, notebooks, magnets and stickers with the "Slow the fuck down. BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE" on them - they are here.

(This is the Year of Dreams 2022 printable planner - the Year of Dreams 2023 will be out this month! It's much more flexible with planner cutouts you can use with my hand-drawn monthly or weekly planner - or with your own favourite planner or bullet journal.)

Why are we so resistant to slowing down and resting?

After all, rest is the most simple and obvious solution to burnout, overwhelm, exhaustion - a lot of the things we're all feeling right now.

And yet I keep seeing people (including myself) looking for a magic pill to not feel these things without taking the time to rest and slow down. Maybe if I eat better, or switch from coffee to mushroom drinks or find the right supplement or herbalist...

Is it not worth questioning the stories we tell about why we absolutely cannot slow down? Or exploring the guilt, shame or fear that come up when we try?

Is it not worth exploring the bigger picture of WHY so many of us are burned out? Like what is it, about the culture we live in, that is creating an epidemic of burnout? And how could we potentially CHANGE the culture to be healthier all around?

Because focusing on nutrition and exercise is the individualist approach, and I think it’s the individualist approach that got us into this mess.

We’re simply trying to do more than we can do because we have unreasonable expectations and insufficient support systems.

And this impacts us all in so many different ways.

So. Let’s keep showing up. Each day, each tiny thing we do to get more rest and/or explore how all of this is playing out in your life, counts.

On Mondays I do Creative Genius Planning, so I am going to keep doing that this month, while bringing our theme for the month into my weekly planning.

I have not been using the Creative Genius Planning videos lately - and that has felt right as I've been wanting to slow down and re-fill the well.

But last week I noticed I really do need more direction with my projects, and goals for how I want to move them forward each week.

So the plan this week is to plan, and to keep lots of space for rest + creativity, too.

Inside Dream Book there are seven different Creative Genius Planning videos for different situations. But I have shared the basic practice video on my blog, and that's the one I decided to use this week.

So you can do that with me here. (If you're in Dream Book get all 7 videos to chose the one that fits best for your week here)

Will stop writing here, go do that, and come back....

ARGH!!

Every time I listen to this video I ask myself: why do I ever skip it?

So often, I feel like it's not wroth the time, I can just ask myself "what do I need this week?" and especially lately as I have been deliberately living more space in my calendar for the summer - it's like why even bother with this?

Why bother because: I feel SO GOOD following this video. It shifts my energy. It helps me connect to myself and my dreams.

AND after I have more of a clear container for my week - any time I feel lost or stuck I have these notes to help me find my way.

Just writing out what I want to do while in that space of feeling connected to my creative genius and believing myself makes SUCH a difference.

And this is HUGE for BEING my most creative, powerful and magnetic self.

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Friday Check-In

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. I'll be posting an update here every day (M-F) for the month of August and I'm also doing short videos on Instagram to share things I am learning along the way.

For this challenge, I designed mugs, notebooks, magnets and stickers with the "Slow the fuck down. BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE" on them - they are here.

On Fridays I do a series of reflective journaling prompts.

I've been doing this for about 8 years - with the same prompts - and sharing it inside the Creative Dream Circle.

This weekly practice helps me figure out what I am learning and what I need anyhow to move forward for the next week.

Some of these prompts don't really make sense being shared outside of that container, so I decided to post a shortened version of it this month. While you are doing the 30 days of journaling and meditation, it's really helpful to look back each week and what you learned and what that might tell you about what to do next.

Last week’s focus was: 

Get the 30 days of journaling + meditation started and let it be DELICIOUS.

 

What happened in the last week?

A lot of it was delicious, but a lot of it was really hard, too. Resistance, self doubt, frustration, boredom - all the usual suspects came out to play.

I started the daily posts, and found it wasn't as complicated as it seemed to do this in a public way. I am adding extra update videos on Instagram some days, and then not doing it on the days I don't have anything else to say. Before I thought I needed a plan for things like that, and I am finding just being in my creative flow with it feels good.

For me, having solid/clear/thoughtful plans can feel like safety. So when doing something that is stretching my comfort zone, I want to bring that safety in.

AND

Having it all planned out in advance can keep me from really being present in the process.

I like where I am balancing those things right now.

 

What am I learning/How do I feel about this?

I still feel I am in a steep learning curve around creating this new "expanded art + writing practice" that I am dreaming of. I've been getting the outer stuff in place - working on my new studio space. But there is SO MUCH inner stuff to work through.

 

What do I need now?

Sitting with this question and feeling uncomfortable with it then something came to me - a fun creative project. I feel overwhelmed by most of my project ideas. What if there was something really simple and fun?

I have been meaning to macramé around this hanging lap cord I have - I bought macrame cord to match the lamp (an orange star) over a year ago! I could just sit down and start that. I could get that done in a few days, and the doing would give me space to think about what project I want to do next. I FEEL BEST WHEN I HAVE CREATIVE PROJECTS ON THE GO, in all caps to really remind myself of how important this is.

 

Taking all of this into account, my focus for the next week is:

Keep going with the daily meditation and journaling on: Slow the fuck down! BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE.

I've done so much to explore the slow down part already, I really want to focus on exploring the qualities of creativity, power and magnetism and what they mean to me now.

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Self doubt, fear and anxiety swoop in to mess everything up.

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. I'll be posting an update here every day (M-F) for the month of August and I'm also doing short videos on Instagram to share things I am learning along the way.

For this challenge, I designed mugs, notebooks, magnets and stickers with the "Slow the fuck down. BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE" on them - they are here.

After yesterday’s meditation I had a realization:

Last month I had decided to put away my business goals for this year. Working on them felt too daunting but also I felt like I didn’t actually want them anymore, and I wanted to figure out what I DO want.

The realization was: I very much DO want those goals. But I also very much DO NOT want to go about them in the ways I have been.

And thinking back over the last 12 years - I have been so happy about HOW I have created and grown this business - all of the ways I have figured out how to stay true to myself and my values AND make money.

But as happy and free as I have felt about HOW I do things these last 12 years, it no longer feels happy and free.

I am now super aware of all of the places where I feel….. I don’t quite have the right words yet. Oppressed and impacted by capitalism and this toxic culture is the closest I can come, though I am aware that is not a feeling. I mean, are we ever truly free of it, when we live in it? This idea that you can make enough money to be free of capitalism is complete nonsense. Capitalism isn’t just about money.

But back to my realization:

I do still want what I want, and I know I want to go about it in a whole new way and I know some of the QUALITIES of this new way (creative, free, playful, expansive, healing, aligned)...

but I have no clue what this actually looks like.

ARGH. So many times I have had clients some to me with this exact same problem. And I always say “Excellent. You have a vague sense of how you want it to be, that’s more than enough to start with.”

But being on the other side, just having a vague sense of it, actually feels painful.

To know what I want only vaguely, and not know how to get there! It’s a space that invites in self doubt very easily.

Yesterday I felt optimistic about being able to figure out a whole new way to do things, and I saw what my next steps are: to create a new set of Alchemy Wheels for my goals.

Alchemy Wheels are one of the best tools we use in Dream Book that help you map out the inner and outer paths to do what you want to do, by focusing on the practices that support you in doing the work AND staying completely non-linear and following your own feelings/inspiration/energy in any given moment.

This morning I was riding my bike to the park for coffee + journaling and thinking about the new alchemy wheels I would create and then….. it happened.

As I said, this space of wanting to do something new and not seeing the way yet, is very vulnerable to inner critic attacks.

My inner critic attacked.

All of the “Why bother? What is the point? You’ll never pull this off” voices started to go off. I started to feel defeated.

And then I started to feel angry. How do I STILL have this much self doubt and anxiety about my dreams?

So that’s where I am focusing today.

I am using the Un-Sticking Station (another favourite Dream Book tool) to meet with my feelings that I won’t be able to figure this out.

While using the meditation, I had something surprising happen - instead of my working with my “stuck self” I had three different selves show up:

  1. Anxiety, self doubt + fear (one self, all tangled up in this stuff)
  2. Anger + frustration about being stuck
  3. I just want to give up on all of this

These are a lot of feelings to hold at once. I mean - no wonder I can’t figure out my next steps with all of this happening.

Drawing them out helped me see that these are all valid responses. Of course I feel self doubt and fear and anxiety and then of course I feel frustrated and angry about that and then of course I just want to give up.

So, starting with the me who wants to give up:

Can you tell me what, exactly, you want to give up on here?

All of it actually. Isn’t there a simpler way to live? Everything feels so complicated.

We are living on a planet in a culture that is actively killing the planet. And that's just the tip of the iceberg! This IS complicated.

But it’s not! It shouldn’t be! Your life is a miracle. YOU are a miracle. Can’t you just feel that way all the time?

I sure would like to. So when you say you want to give up on everything - you mean all of the complicated parts of life? You still want to enjoy life?

I want to sew and make art and write and make guided journals. I want to wake up and appreciate the sun shine and the opportunity for a new day. I want to feel energized and enthusiastic about my life and what I am doing.

Yeah, I want all of that too.

Let me guess, you’re going say “but we live in reality”

Well we actually do live in reality.

[We just sit with this a minute]

I have to think about the hard things. You cannot do ANY of those things you mentioned if I am not paying the bills!

Oh shit. That’s right.

But I hear you, and I love you, and I don’t think your needs should be steamrolled by practicalities. What if we make this need to enthusiastically enjoy life be equal to the need to pay bills and take care of all of the practical stuff that we’d rather ignore?

[Then I realise - this has been a week of a LOT of dumb errands. I do feel like my energy gets sucked into these things I’d rather not do. This part of me being all sulky is such a valid response to this AND there just are times when I have a lot of dumb errands to do.]

OK back to my drawing. Seems like anger + frustration is the next one to talk to.

Hello, anger + frustration.

ARRRGGGRRROOOWWWWLLLL

Yeah, I feel that.

It is SO unfair that I/you/we STILL have all of this self doubt about doing new things! This is complete bullshit!

Yeah, not just that but we also have all new levels of anxiety thanks to peri-menopause.

[Anger + frustration is kind of bowled over by me just noticing and stating how this has been hard]

Hey, I am not here to admonish you or tell you to feel differently. That’s not the point of the Un-Sticking process. It’s just that you, and the others, are all feeling so much, so intensely, it leaves me no clear way forward. I want to work with you, not obliterate you.

I always forget that part. When I am SO angry I just end up being angry at everything.

That makes sense. So do you want to tell me more about what you’re really angry and frustrated about?

I’ve just been doing this for so long. So why do I STILL doubt myself? Why is it STILL scary to start something new?

I would also ask - where does the assumption come from, that it should get easier?

Oh! Shit.

Yeah.

[This reminds me, I have been wanting to write a thing about white supremacy, the holistic wellness movement and eugenics - about where our notion that “things should be easy” and also "things are easy for GOOD people and if you struggle that means you're doing something wrong" actually comes from]

But it’s totally valid to feel angry and frustrated that this feels hard. AND it’s totally valid that this IS hard. Both are true. How does this feel for you?

I think my anger wants to protect you/me/us from how hard it is sometimes. But - it actually can’t.

Well, what it does is get in the way of me FEELING all of that self doubt. So it is protective in that way. But that means I can’t process or work through it, so I just get stuck in it.

So I am not actually helping.

But isn’t that life though? We do our best, we try to help, but we can still unintentionally cause harm.

That is life. And of course I’ll get angry about it sometimes.

How does this feel now?

I feel settled. I’m proud that I tried to protect you, and I get that how I was doing it wasn’t helping.

OK then, on to self doubt, anxiety + fear.

How are you feeling?

I’ve been listening to these other conversations. I appreciate how much these other parts of me/you/us want what is best for me. I think I was in a very reactive and immature place - I go there VERY easily. But this space to validate and process feelings, this listening to you talk with the others, helped me come back to myself.

Self doubt is a reactionary pattern, it’s not the truth of who I am. The anxiety and fear get triggered by the self doubt. (And parts of the anxiety are triggered by other things and then it all gets confused)

Do you need anything from me?

I need you to not give up. One of the easiest ways to soothe self doubt is to look at the life I/you/we have created. How could I doubt that I can do this next thing, when I look at all we’ve already done?

Yeah, I feel that.

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How do I want to balance the BEing with the DOing?

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. I'll be posting an update here every day (M-F) for the month of August and I'm also doing short videos on Instagram to share things I am learning along the way.

For this challenge, I designed mugs, notebooks, magnets and stickers with the "Slow the fuck down. BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE" on them - they are here.

Today I woke up super early, and did the meditation.

This time the “BE as creative, powerful, and magnetic as you ARE” came up as the thing to explore.

I filled my body with that energy and then fell back asleep. I woke up feeling amazing.

There is so much I want to share about the magic of slowing down but it’s the other part of this that I am really feeling today.

I am creative, powerful, and magnetic.

AND I can lose sight of that when I am caught up in my to-do lists.

I can start to feel like it’s the DOING that gets me to where I want to be.

Though I know it’s not 100% the BEING that gets me there either.

How do I want to balance the BEing with the DOing?

This is one of the big questions for me right now.

It’s ALWAYS been a part of my work - both my own personal process and what I support my clients and groups with.

Sometimes we talk about this as a spectrum between BEing and DOing.

But it’s more dimensional than that.

I mean - doing or not doing is not actually related to being or not being.

So, what I REALLY want to explore is:

HOW do I want to BE? Which aspects of myself do I want to live most in alignment with? What’s changing about how I want to be in my personal and professional lives?

HOW do I want to DO? What drives the doing? Which part of me is in charge of how the doing gets done? There is a LOT of auto-pilot stuff here - some helpful and some not. How do I shift through that? What are the overarching QUALITIES I want to bring to my approach to doing?

This starts to feel all vague and ethereal and like I am just going to come up with more questions than I could ever answer.

This is good!

This is a good way to explore. Questions are expansive. Most answers are not.

Try to stay open to ALL of the questions that come up for you.

And as more questions come up - sit with those questions too, and journal about that. Be with the feelings that come up. Follow the rabbit holes of new ideas that are sparked.

Don't rush to find the fastest answer, give yourself space to really be with the questions and all the things they bring up for you. That's what a reflective meditation and journaling practice is all about.

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It’s hard to get started

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We are doing the 30 day journaling + meditation invitation for the month of August. An explanation of this project is here. For this challenge, I some mugs, notebooks, magnets and stickers with the "Slow the fuck down. BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE" written on them - they are here.

I have written and re-written this post so many times I have lost count.

Each post was a actually really good.

AND felt inadequate to express what I actually want to do with this project and I how I feel as I begin.

I don't remember being this challenged by a project in a very long time.

And so I am going to take the projects' advice: SLOW THE FUCK DOWN.

Don't try to share everything today.

Just share A thing.

A thing that's happening: I am feeling A LOT of resistance to doing this.

Sometimes resistance can hide in reasonable-sounding reasons why "this just isn't the right time".

And sometimes it shows up as inner critic self doubt attacks. Or just - getting so stressed and crabby that you throw the whole thing away.

This resistance is a natural part of all dreams, all creative pursuits, and all healing processes.

Right now, the resistance is manifesting as EXTREMELY stiff shoulders (my therapist once told me that is often a sign of struggling with oppressive systems that are pushing us down. And yes that's how it feels, I am pushing up against a lot of very powerful invisible things here) and an EXTREMELY crabby mind.

Trying to calm my mind enough to write clearly is very effort-FULL which is really the opposite of the whole vibe I am going for here.

A lot of feelings are going to come up in this process.

Dream Book members - remember our principles!!! If you feel stuck or like you're doing this wrong, re-read them.

Accepting that your process IS unfolding in the right way for you while honouring all of the feelings that come up are important parts of this work.

Without them, you just skate around your blind spots.

So - today I am honouring my feeling about not wanting to do this.

AND honouring my feelings about how I WANTED to start this, and my feelings about how that just isn't happening.

And, deeper down inside, listening to that part of me that knows this is exactly the perfect way to start.

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30 Day Journaling + Meditation

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30 day meditation and journaling challenge

As we go through these 30 days, I will be sharing my own journaling and process.

But today we're starting by figuring out how YOU are going to do this.

What's actually doable for you?

What makes this feel like an INVITATION and not a CHALLENGE?

How do you WANT to do this?

Step 1: pick your practice

This is a "30 day journaling + meditation invitation" and so I recommend you do BOTH journaling and meditation for this.

There is a reason why I always use them together.

But this is your thing, so do it your way.

Step 2: define your minimum practice.

Some days you may want to do more, but all you are committing to are these minimum practices.

For example, for meditation you could pick:

  • Sit down, close your eyes, and breathe for 30 seconds (change this to however long feels right for you).
  • Sit stare at the wall or out a window for 30 seconds (change this to however long feels right for you).
  • Go for a meditative walk for 5 minutes (change this to however long feels right for you).

Either way, your meditation time is spent contemplating the theme:

Slow the fuck down!

BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE.

And just follow your thoughts wherever they go. Follow all of the rabbit holes.

No, this is not traditional meditation where you empty your mind. This is a meditation as a tool for making space to explore.

Right after the meditation, you journal.

This way you can take notes about what you learned in your meditation, to not lose the threads.

Here is your minimum practice for journaling:

Open your journal, having a pen handy, and sit there with it for 2 minutes (change this to however long feels right for you) (no you don't have to actually write).

The assignment for today: set your intentions

Write out how you're going to do this:

  • What you hope to receive from this practice by the end of the month
  • What time of day will you do this
  • How long will you meditate for
  • How long will you sit with your journal for

Write these all out in your journal, don't just do this in your head.

Dream Book members - if you want a private space to share your comments as you do this with me - use the daily mastermind posts.

See you back here tomorrow.

PS: I made mugs, notebooks + stickers for this challenge. Check them out here!

I'm also working on a whole line of Creative Dream Incubator mugs, notebooks, zipper pouches + stickers.

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30 Day Journaling + Meditation Invitation (we don’t need more challenges right now)

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Two messages that my dream has sent me lately:

Slow the fuck down!

BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE

Meditation and journaling make it easy to receive messages, flashes of insight and new perspectives that can change everything.

What's less easy is knowing what to DO with those messages. How to work with them so they actually CAN change everything.

The secret is: daily practice.

Your daily practice is a container for your process of receiving information from your inner knowing and figuring out how to act on that information.

Without a consistent practice of healing and growth how do you expect to heal and grow?

You know how good it feels to do yoga, but you don't expect to stay feeling calm and stretched out if you only do it once a month, right?

The secret to daily practice is: make it small enough that it fits in your daily life AND enjoyable enough that you actually want to do it.

When I say daily I mean that's the goal. OF COURSE you will miss some days, that's fine.

But what if you had a thing you did each day that you enjoyed doing, that FELT GOOD TO DO and then also helped move your life towards where you want it to be?

This is the magic of having a daily practice with your dreams.

This is what I teach in-depth in Dream Book.

But for August I want to share a really simple daily practice out here, (on my blog and social media) and invite you to join me.

Find out what kind of magic is possible for you right now.

We start on Monday, August 1.

You don't have to have any ideas at all about HOW to do this - that first post I share on Monday will be about setting up your practice to be DO-ABLE and enjoyable for you.

I'll give you a simple practice to start with and you can make whatever changes you like to make it suit you.

And then throughout the month we'll find out what kind of magic is possible, when you show up for it every day.

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Being in the goo

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I had this transformation all planned out.

A summer of slowing down. Burnout recovery. Creating a whole new relationship with my creativity and productivity. Naps, journaling, making art, eating amazing salads while also moving my workspace upstairs and creating space for my new E X P A N D E D art and writing practice.

Nothing is going according to plan. Except naps and salad, I have that part down.

I mean I have taught this long enough to know - if your "transformation" is going according to plan, you are not actually transforming anything.

So I am taking that as a good sign.

There's a lot I want to say.

I think there's a lot we all really should be talking about, in terms of sharing how this time is impacting us, the ways we choose to respond to that, and the healing that we are each being called to do.

But I don't have the capacity for any of that right now.

So I'll say: I am making some amazing summer salads. I am feeling SO nourished.

During the winter I was freezing lemons - I would put 1/2 or 1/3 of a lemon into a smoothie and then freeze the rest. Now I am using those frozen lemons and homemade lavender syrup to make lemonade in the blender and OMG.

I've moved 75% of my work stuff upstairs. I gave away my old bed frame and made arrangements for the mattress to be picked up this week.

I moved into the new bed downstairs. I have slept upstairs in the loft for the last 11 years. The longest I've been in any bedroom. This is a HUGE transition for me. The first morning I woke up and actually wanted to cry I missed my upstairs bed so much.

I know I still want to move ahead with this re-configuring of the space.

AND it's a little like being ripped out a beloved space.

It even feels like not having a home, even though I am still very much in my home.

This is what it's like, being in the goo of transformation.

I'm going with it. Staying nourished and doing what I can each day which is so much less than I wish it was. Following my intuition about what to do next which feels grounded and clear but also disorienting and new.

I am thinking about how a seed changes states to become a plant. How sudden and wild it is.

I am feeling that but in super slow motion.

I trust what I am growing into.

Even though it all looks like a mess right now.

I wrote this last week, but then I was so much "in the mess of being in the process" that I forgot to post it. This week I am in a completely different place - for one, I LOVE my new bed downstairs and have put a whole jungle of plants around it and I don't miss sleeping upstairs at all now and I wake up feeling so grateful for my home, again. When you're in the process of change it's good to remember that things will continue to change.

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Dream = Book. Christa published her Water Yoga book!

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I am thrilled to share that we have another book baby! Christa Fairbrother has published Water Yoga, A Teacher's Guide To Improving Movement, Health and Wellbeing.

Here is her story, in her words:

Dream = Book

I remember when I was a kid, I said I would be a writer when I grew up.  Like most kids, there were some other ideas too.  And like most adults, I grew up to do different things than my childhood dreams.  But unlike most adults, I didn’t let go of those early dreams, and this month I’m seeing them fulfilled with the publication of my first book, Water Yoga.

Nice to meet you.  I’m Christa Fairbrother, water yoga coach and trainer. 

I live in Florida with my husband and two teenage sons.  I drink tons of tea.  I love reading.  And yes, my passion and vocation is water yoga.  

What is water yoga?  Simple, it’s taking yoga postures, breathing techniques, and yoga philosophy and doing it in the pool.  Except it is a bit harder than that as the water’s properties affect your balance, muscular effort, and nervous system responses.  As someone who lives with multiple kinds of arthritis, I specialize in working with people who live with chronic pain.  Someone who lives with arthritis really appreciates the water offloading sore joints, maintaining joint health through strong muscles, and dampening their pain responses.  They get all that without having to get on and off the ground or bear weight in their hands.  That’s just one example of how yoga in the water benefits people in differently than on land.

Helping people with arthritis through yoga became my passion after my diagnosis and what led me to water yoga. 

Teaching any subject, including water yoga, requires you to communicate well.  While I had earned a graduate degree and did some writing for my previous careers, I hadn’t focused as much on outreach.

While water yoga is not new, it can feel like yoga’s best-kept secret.  By publishing on social media, writing articles, and appearing on podcasts, I help people learn that water yoga doesn’t just exist; it’s valuable for them to learn. Except I hadn’t done any of those things before.  In trying to educate people about the topic, I also needed to put myself out there in bigger, bolder ways than I had before.

I got good feedback, and my students were happy and learning.  And people kept saying you should write a book.  Which brought me full circle to my childhood dreams buried underneath my adult self-doubts and excuses.  I thought about it and thought “in the future,” meaning some undetermined time as a pipedream. 

And then COVID came.

Everything shut down.  I still had a backyard pool to practice in, but I couldn’t teach my students so I had a lot of newfound time on my hands.  I decided to step up and write the book.  Three years previously, we’d had a hurricane that forced us to evacuate and lose power for a week.  I wrote and self-published a water yoga philosophy book over two-weeks.  The stress caused my health problems to flare up, and I couldn’t sleep for weeks so I wrote a book instead.  That experience taught me disasters are the perfect time to write.

I wrote a book proposal.  It was accepted right away, and so I had a book to write. 

That meant daily word counts, writer’s block, imposter syndrome, and a whole bunch of other stuff that sounds like my health diagnoses.  And I was lucky enough to find Creative Dream Incubator and Andrea.

Because while writing a book is a solitary experience, you’re never alone.  You’re just in your own head a lot.  Which isn’t always helpful creatively or emotionally.  Using Dream Book while writing the book gave me an outlet to deal with all the stuff that was coming up in the moment instead of letting it fester.  I could get my doubts, worries, and to-do lists written down and then move on to the book.  I actually have two art degrees, so I have a lot more confidence in creating within the visual arts.  Sitting down daily for a few minutes of visual creativity while working through my thought processes got the words flowing and kept me confident and supported.  It felt a little more familiar than all text, all the time.

I know Andrea calls her program Dream Book.  My expression of the program is Dream = Book (Water Yoga).

I hope you don’t give up on your dreams.  Write that book or paint the painting you have inside of you.  If you need help or support it exists.  You will find it.  You and your dreams are worth it.  

My bio - Christa Fairbrother, MA, ERYT 200/500, ATRIC, AFP, AFAP is an internationally recognized water yoga coach and trainer.  She lives in Florida with her husband and two sons.  When she’s not in the pool, there’s nothing she loves better than a good book and a huge cup of tea.  You can find more information about her book, Water Yoga, on her website.

Christa also sent me some photos of her Dream Book, with permission to share!

Now - go check out the book!

 

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Remember Your New Year’s Intentions?

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Every month in the Year of Dreams 2022 planner there’s a reminder to check in with your vision for your year, and space to journal about how that felt and what adjustments you might want to make.

I didn’t want to do that this month. I mean most months I don’t want to but this month it REALLY felt uncomfortable.

But here I am doing that. And sharing my experience as a way of offering a light on your path, in case it's uncomfortable for you too, right now.

As I sit down to answer these questions and I feel like a total failure.

This feels so heavy I want to just stop, and make up a story for why it just makes sense that I not do this reflection work this month.

And I say “Andrea, you don’t HAVE TO do this, but… this is your job. And YOU are the one who gave yourself this job, you worked hard for it, and now you don’t want to do it? What’s up with that?”

Oh. I do want to do it. I know that this is important. I know all of the things I teach are true and that being in the process is messy and that nothing is wrong, I just need to be brave enough to keep showing up. Can I just complain and throw a bit of a tantrum first?

“Sure sweetie you do that”

Permission to tantrum led me to just sit down and flip through my Year of Dreams journal.

I remember how excited I was back then but I realize…

Actually it was a desperate kind of positivity. Like “holy fuck this year has got to be better” vibes.

What I feel now are “Holy wow I am really getting into my own flow. Feeling myself. Feeling my future. I may be moving slow as fuck but this is deep and rich.”

It turns out I love where I am.

It’s just when I am judging myself based on goals I’d set six months ago that I feel shitty.

But I am not six-months-ago me anymore. Me-from-today is totally different. I mean, I have bangs now. I have these new outfits I made myself that FEEL LIKE my future self. I have totally different plans now.

I actually *KNOW MORE* about what it will take to achieve some of those bigger goals, from the last 6 months of experimenting with them.

And that’s why I know that some of them are just not going to happen this year.

And that’s why it feels so right to be focused on different things because these things feel needed right now.

I am re-arranging the Dream Loft, tearing down the workspace my husband had built me when we got married, and using that wood to build something new.

I am creating a new art + writing + creative exploration space in the upstairs loft.

I am E X P A N D I N G my art and writing practice in all ways. New bigger space. More time + attention. New projects + directions.

I am really expanding into my future self in all of these important ways.

Just not in the ways I thought I would, when I made those plans in January.

BUT

That doesn’t mean I was wrong.

You should literally NEVER sit down, make a plan to get your dream, and then follow that plan exactly. That is a recipe for disaster because…

BEING ON THE PATH HEALS AND GROWS YOU.

And as you heal and grow your perspective shifts so you see completely different options.

If you follow that plan that you-before-you-healed-and-grew made - you are actually stagnating.

To grow means to change.

Again, the Year of Dreams 2022 is a tool to help you stay in this process. Which means the goal is NOT to follow exactly what you said you’d do in January. The goal is to stay in the process which means HEALING AND GROWING which means surprising new things emerge.

This is how you tap into your magic to make your dreams real.

So.

Having moved through that initial “why bother doing this I am a complete failure” I now feel really proud of how I am showing up for myself and my dreams.

AND I feel excited it’s about what’s next, which was NOT on the initial Visioning 2022 section, so I am adding it now.

(You can still get the Year of Dreams 2022 and play along for the rest of the year. Six months of HEALING and GROWING into your dream! The Year of Dreams 2023 is going to be quite different - details to come soon-ish)

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We are the creators. We are the ones with the power.

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We had a group coaching call in Dream Book where one person attending (a very accomplished creative entrepreneur actually) said “I mean, what am I even doing?” and I laughed because I saw myself in it.

“What am I even doing?” came up again and again later on in the call as more people shared their stories.

It’s actually REALLY EASY to feel “what am I even doing?” when you are doing your own thing.

It’s natural to feel lost.

It’s natural to think you’re stuck when you’re really just incubating, or resting, or preparing for the next thing in ways your conscious self doesn’t know about yet.

With our dreams, the tangible parts are only about 1/3 of what is actually happening. So if you’re only using tangible, measurable things to measure progress, you are missing most of the picture.

And yet, this is what we do. Myself included!

The week before last I was in that “what am I even doing?” place. At the beginning of the week I was being GRACIOUS with myself and my process. I was MAKING SPACE for how I was actually feeling. I was honouring my energy.

But a few days in I’m all “OK process, wrap it up. I need to be doing something productive here”

But my process did not wrap it up.

In fact, on Friday, the day I did the Holding Space For What’s Next To Emerge class, I had my list of things to catch up on and instead I took 2 naps.

I felt great DURING the class because I always feel great when I connect with people in that way.

But the rest of the day I was still… meh.

And then Saturday I woke up feeling clear-headed and inspired. I rode my bike downtown, got my favourite doughnut for breakfast, and went to my favourite park (which has a TON of seating overlooking the river - it’s actually a bar at night but gorgeous and quiet in the mornings).

I wrote and wrote and wrote. Blog posts, emails, ideas for new projects.

It’s like all week I WAS incubating.

And then when it was time, it was a time. And everything just poured out.

This kind of trusting our creative flow is one of the things we need, if we want to create a new world.

The way our world is run on the Monday-Friday calendar and being productive on a schedule is counter to our actual human nature.

Also, we only have weekends because enough unions fought for them that they became the cultural norm. We can create new cultural norms. This is literally what humans have always done.

Humans created the huge corporations that have become corrupt and are now holding our economic and political systems hostage. They are even holding our entire future hostage by refusing to address climate change in any meaningful way.

We can destroy this and create something new.

We do it all the time.

This fall, my husband and I are going to tear apart the workspace he built for me when we got married. You know the cute one in the background of my videos? It will be GONE.

We’re going to use that wood to build a wall to create a new bedroom in the loft, in the space where my workspace was.

There’s more to this story, which I will share in time.

I just wanted to share - we can tear apart the things we built for A LOT of different reasons. Maybe because they didn’t turn out like we’d hoped. Maybe because time marches on and we change and want something different. Maybe because they turn corrupt and threaten to destroy the world.

We are the creators. We are the ones with the power.

But we need to give ourselves the thing we need in order to access that power:

  • Feel your feelings.
  • Give yourself space to process your thoughts and ideas.
  • Take your dreams seriously and pursue them.
  • Be open to the GROWTH and HEALING that your dreams are pushing you towards.

I’m doing all of this every day in Dream Book You are always welcome to join me there.

It’s time.

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