I have been accused of being overly critical.
But it's BECAUSE of how much I see the good and potential of the New Age/Wellness/Live Your Best Life Industry, that I can't turn a blind eye to the bad.
For every white person who found it empowering to just focus on the positive and not let the news (AKA reality) get them down, how many Black, Indigenous and People of Colour who couldn't see beyond the blind privilege of that approach were shamed for not being more spiritually evolved? And them had to process those feelings ON TOP OF all the ways systemic racism makes life harder for racialized people?
For every person who's NEVER experienced a serious health issue who could feel empowered by the idea of "I am responsibility for the state of my health. I create a healthy body with healthy thoughts." how many people with disabilities or chronic illness felt shamed, blamed, and like they were not positive enough, and so deserved their symptoms? And them had to process those feelings ON TOP OF their health challenges and ON TOP OF all the ways our culture makes life harder when you have any kind of challenge?
Also - given that underlying victim-blaming attitude - how many organizations were truly open to meeting everyone's accessibility needs?
(I say this knowing that the Creative Dream Incubator is NOT a role model for meeting everyone's accessibility needs)
I mean, personally, I was fat shamed as a normal part of any kind of "healing experience" I attended in the New Age community. Even though I never once brought up the subject of how I felt about my body, I was told repeatedly that if I would just love myself, the weight would be gone.
No one, not even once, asked about my blood pressure or blood sugar reports - more accurate measurements of health than weight.
No one, not even once, asked me how I felt about my size. I feel good! I eat healthy, I exercise, I LOVE carbs, I have the metabolism that I have, and I'm enjoying my life.
All of the shitty things about the culture we live in, now live in the culture we created in the New Age.
But then we added some extra layers of blaming and shaming because we use the "your thoughts create your reality" concept from a place of blind privilege AND a complete political disconnection to the realities of the world - which IS actively encouraged as a way of "focusing on the positive".
A LOT has already been said about that complete disconnection from politics made it possible for the far right Q Anon conspiracy theories to take such a strong hold in the new age. And there are some really eye-opening ideas about how the new age was founded on white supremacist principles, that once you see it, it's hard to un-see it. (If you want to know more - conspirituality is a good place to start )
It's because I believe so completely in the potential of our creative power that I speak out about this.
I believe we can do better.
My hope, with everything happening politically in Canada right now as we continue to discover more children's bodies buried under former residential school grounds, is that we use this time as an opportunity for RADICAL DECOLONIZATION.
We, white Canadians who have been so gifted at turning a blind eye, are being faced with the reality of what colonization is.
It is my hope that we open our eyes, be present to how violent and destructive colonization is, and become actively engaged in the process of truth and reconciliation to stop the violence.
It's because I believe so completely in the potential of our creative power that I know we can do this.
If your healing tools and practices are not sturdy enough to allow you to be present with the real pain of the world - you need to upgrade your tools and practices.
(Dream Book can help you do this, and process the layers of feelings that come up as you AND get more clear about wha you want to DO in response to what you learn - our members are doing amazing work at confronting privilege and cultural appropriation and finding better ways to do things)
Spiritual bypass tools are not going to get us where we need to go next.
All they can do is help individuals feel more comfortable leaning into their privilege to "feel good now" while we watch the whole world get destroyed. Which isn't even hyperbole at this point.
Colonial culture is violently oppressing and destroying Indigenous people every day. But it won't stop there. It will destroy us all, by continuing to squeeze every penny out of resource extraction until most of this planet is no longer livable for humans.
It's because I believe so completely in the potential of our creative power that I know we can create a whole new world.
One of the ways I have most benefitted from learning anti-racism and taking actions outside of my comfort zone, is how my perspective has shifted to include seeing that there are so many more solutions that it seems like there are.
When we stop seeing the world from our own places of privilege, whatever they may be, and instead learn to see from the perspective of those with the least privilege, so much opens up.
Making the world work better for people with less mobility makes it easier to navigate for people with more mobility.
Since the majority of my readers are women - I think you can see that if we eradicated sexism everywhere and made the world safer and more supportive for women - this would benefit men as well.
Following that logic, making the world safer and more supportive for trans and non-binary people would serve all of us in ways we can't even currently see. I mean can you even imagine a world where your gender doesn't determine ANYTHING about who you are or what your potential is? It goes beyond the end of the "pink tax".
This works for literally every marginalized community.
And that's why all of this matters: Because we can get to a better world - but only if we don't leave anyone out.
And the New Age, with the blaming and shaming and blind use of privilege and spiritual bypassing, leaves a lot of people out.
It's time to do better.
I believe your dream is not just possible, but INEVITABLE - as long as you stay engaged with it.
The Creative Dream Circle membership turns 10 in the summer 2022, and my business turns 11 in January 2022.
In all this time, one thing has been totally consistent: if you stay engaged with your dream work, you find the way. Insights, miracles, healing, growth, those huge shifts that change everything - time and the again I've seen them come at just the right time, for the people who keep showing up consistently.
So I am going to do everything I can do to make it easer and more fun for you to stay engaged.
For the last few months I've been working with the members of Dream Book, to find out what they need to make it easier and I now have a huge pile of amazing ideas that I am working on to make this group the best it's ever been for the 10 year anniversary.
2022 is going to be OFF THE HOOK at the Creative Dream Incubator...
Starting with: Goodbye 2021 Hello 2022 Journaling EXTRAVAGANZA
This is a series of mini classes for digging deep into the magic that is available to you now, and using it to create your best new year ever, starting at the beginning of December.
Most will be available for free on my blog - with some extra bonuses just for Dream Book members.
Details, and the first classes, to come next week.
2022 - we are coming for you.
PS: We will be using the prompts from the Year of Dreams 2022 Weekly Planner, Visioning Journal and Creative Dream Playbook - so if you're getting one, get it now! We'll work on the visioning journal in December, so that when January comes we are ready to go.
You can do the classes in your own journal or planner, so you don't NEED the Year of Dreams to do these classes and create your amazing vision and plan for 2022 - but the Year of Dreams will be RELENTLESS in reminding you of your goals so you keep working on them all year long.
Creative Genius Planning Sessions are about doing your weekly planning from your most wise, brave and creative self. You get to your next level with your dreams by being your next-level self, doing next-level things.
Do them with me every Monday and you'll AMAZE yourself.
There is a 15 minute Basic Creative Genius Planning Session right here (meditation + journaling class) for planning your amazing week.
AND I am creating a full "expansion pack" of extra videos that address specific situations that you’ll come up against with your planning. I’m sharing a new one, with a new theme, each week.
This week we're looking at how to approach your planning when you've got OBSTACLES.
Having an obstacle is just a part of having a dream. You can't just get stuck every time you have an obstacle, you NEED a way of facing the obstacles head on, and working through them.
So that's what we'll work with in this week's Creative Planning Sessions Video:
If you're in Dream Book - watch this on our private blog, with a link to The Obstacle Is The Way Through Alchemy Practice - plus a private comment section for sharing your goals for the week, asking questions and getting extra support.
If you're not in Dream Book - if you like the Creative Genius Planning Sessions you will LOVE Dream Book.
I feel like have been going in circles with my dreams.
I want to do _____ but I'm stuck about where to start.
I am inspired to ____ but I can't start today of course, I'm so overwhelmed.
I would love to______ some day when I have more energy.
It's all these signs of burnout.
All year, I've been bringing these questions to my therapist that center around the idea: how do I go back to how I WAS?
I want to be more resilient. I want to have the energy and ease and creative flow and enthusiasm and confidence that I had 2 years ago.
My therapist has yet to offer a magic pill about that.
She moves the conversation towards "how do I accept that I am where I am, and what do I need to take good care of myself here?"
But I haven't wanted to be here.
When you can't be where you are, you can't move forward either.
I don't need my therapist to tell me that, that's something I have said to almost event client in the last 12 years. The trick to dreams is being present where you are AND being present with the dream. Being the portal.
I don't have the energy to portal.
But I still dream.
And this has kept me in a hampster wheel.
But you know what?
This feels right.
This feels like the right way to respond to what's happening in the world.
Nothing can grow always forever. There are times of rest and falling apart. And decomposition even.
Compost for future dreams.
I am swimming in compost.
And actually, if I'm being honest, I do have more energy, clarity and enthusiasm than I did 6 months ago.
It's just that - inspiration and vision don't take a break.
My dreams speak to me as clear as ever but my ability to respond is not what it was.
Almost 2 years of being caught between these two things is very frustrating.
Naming it helps.
I don't want to disconnect from my dream. I want to keep holding it, and moving towards it at the pace that works for where I am right now.
And I want to remember that this part of creative dreaming is ALWAYS frustrating because we NEVER move as fast as our dreams.
But right now, it's especially frustrating.
Which actually presents an opportunity.
This frustration, the way it rubs you the wrong way, the stuff it triggers - being ESPECIALLY frustrating means you get ESPECIALLY triggered which means you have an ESPECIALLY clear view into the deeper stuff in you that needs healing in order to be able to get to your dream.
It sucks, but it's true.
For me this means spending more time in the Un-Sticking Station (in Dream Book).
Which is giving me all new insights about those shadowy places where I hold myself back while convincing myself that I am doing everything I can.
Which is helping me clear some inner stuff that I didn't even know I had a few years ago.
Which means... I AM swimming in compost. And planting new seeds everywhere in this exceptional soil.
So much is possible from this place, even when so little is happening on the surface.
I often feel dismayed by the state of the world and too small to do anything about any of our larger problems.
It's a weird combination of angry and overwhelmed and exhausted and determined to DO SOMETHING without knowing WHAT to do and sometimes it causes me to spiral a bit.
I STOP the spiral and I STOP feeling so small when I focus on doing what I CAN do - using the unique gifts that I have, to do my part, to make the world better.
But where is the line between using my privilege to stay in a bubble of positivity to avoid looking at the brokenness of the world, and getting so lost is how the brokenness of the world breaks my heart, that I end up unable to do anything?
Intersectionality is key to building a better world, while we build our own dreams.
"Using your creative gifts to offer something helpful to the world" is the MOST common dream people have who work with me.
This looks like a lot of different things - books published, coaching programs developed, non-profits created, bodies of work painted... but at the core it's this same thing, of using your unique gifts to help shine a light.
While we are using our gifts to help others - we HAVE TO be seeing from beyond our own perspectives and privileges.
Otherwise, the things we create with our dreams only help reinforce the systems of oppression that we live in.
We can see this in what happened with the "make money online" world.
In 2009 this was an open, level playing field where anyone with great ideas to share was suddenly given a platform. It was the democratization of media and it had the potential to change everything.
Today? It's this weird late stage capitalist influencer culture where lots of great ideas are buried while really stupid things get elevated. Just like the old media.
We re-created all of the old problems in this new playing field.
Which is why, for me, as a white person, it's been important to be really deeply LEARNING what white supremacy is and all the forms of systemic injustice it creates. And how that intersects with other forms of systemic injustice.
Because until I can see it, I am re-creating it in whatever I create.
That's why I talk about it so much.
We are unknowingly hooked in to the myriad of oppressive systems that we live inside of, and we drag them with us everywhere we go until we learn to see them for what they are.
Following your creative dream is about getting FREE.
The work of dreaming IS getting free of the things, inside and outside of you, that hold you back, so that you can BE who you really ARE and CREATE what you are here to CREATE.
You can't actually get FREE of things that you are unconsciously hooked into, without learning to see the hooks.
This has been a theme in my recent blog posts: everything you avoid weakens you, everything you face strengthens you. As long as you're using spiritual bypass as a tool, you are building your dreams on shaky ground.
We need to walk that line, to be present with the world as it is while we hold the vision for a better future.
Your creativity has purpose.
Your dreams have purpose.
We can build a better world.
Still, some days, when I look all of the problems in the world - this work I am doing feels VERY small.
But then I think about each time a member of Dream Book has published a work of art or book or created a coaching program that has helped seed new ideas into our culture to shift consciousness.
And I think about how each person who is actively doing this work of GROWING into their dream and ALIGNING with their inner truth impacts the people around them.
Honestly, it still feels small, in light of everything in the world.
But it feels IMPORTANT.
It feels like me doing my part.
Creative Genius Planning Sessions are about doing your weekly planning from your most wise, brave and creative self. You get to your next level with your dreams by being your next-level self, doing next-level things.
There is a 15 minute Creative Genius Planning Session right here (meditation + journaling class) for planning your amazing week.
AND I am creating a full "expansion pack" of extra videos that address specific situations that you’ll come up against with your planning. I’m sharing a new one, with a new theme, each week.
This week we're exploring how to approach this when you've got two things competing for your attention.
Often it's your dream and your job that compete.
Sometimes it's two different dreams or two different creative projects.
There's lots of different ways this happens, and that competing thing can make it harder to focus on anything and get your stuff done!
So that's what we'll work with in this week's Creative Planning Sessions Video:
If you're in Dream Book - watch this on our private blog, with a private comment section for sharing your goals for the week, asking questions and getting extra support.
If you're not in Dream Book - if you like the Creative Genius Planning Sessions you will LOVE Dream Book.
About my post from last week on how Love & Light are used as New Age gaslighting....
Being uncomfortable about other people having human feelings is generally a sign that we are not allowing OURSELVES to have our feelings.
And it's not a crime. It doesn't make you a bad person.
But it does make it harder for you to heal, grow, and create more of what you want in your life.
If does make it harder for you to be the change you want to see in the world.
Because everything you avoid has power over you. Everything you face strengthens you.
We are powerful! We are healers and artists and world-changers.
We can look hard things in the eye BECAUSE we believe in our power to do better.
BUT the New Age/Wellness/Live Your Best Life culture is RIFE with spiritual by-pass.
PLUS it's human nature to want to avoid discomfort.
If you think of a spectrum between:
[full on facing everything like a boss, healing and growing through very little obstacle in your way]
and
[#goodvibesonly I won't acknowledge anything negative and will even shame others for "being negative"]
recognize that we move around on this spectrum all the time.
Self awareness helps!
Reflecting on your own tendencies to bypass helps you be more aware of when and how and why you do this, so you can make more empowered choices.
So here we go...
The journal prompts. How do you know if you are really healing the thing or attempting to spiritual bypass the thing?
What happens when a life event knocks you down and you're right up against the thing again (the thing you thought you'd healed)?
Has it changed at all? Or are you up against the exact same thing?
We talk a lot about the healing path being a spiral. But is it?
Are you really seeing your issue in a new light?
Or are you just coming back up against this thing because you haven't actually dealt with it?
Are you sure?
What makes you sure?
If something has changed about how you are engaging with this thing: what is it, specifically?
Are you reacting in the same way that you used to? Don't focus on how you feel, it's easy to "feel like" you're seeing this from a more evolved place. Look at your behaviour. How has it changed?
Spiritual bypass keeps things VERY vague and a LOT can hide in vagueness. So get specific.
You are drawing from your true power to heal and create when you can be specific and clear and un-flinching. Especially when you're dealing with the things you really struggle with.
If you've been using spiritual by-pass as a tool, it will be VERY uncomfortable to lean into your true power instead. You will try to stay vague to get out of the discomfort of facing the thing you don't want to face.
Take the discomfort as a good sign.
And stay with it.
Remember that there is a POWER in being able to face the hard stuff head on, including BEING WITH the feelings that it brings up.
This is the inner work.
It's in processing your feelings about the obstacles where you find the fuel that will help you get beyond the obstacle.
You find your power.
You find whole new ways of seeing the thing, which give you a plethora of new options for how to handle it. You tap into your INFINITE source of creativity which can generate INFINITE solutions.
Because everything you avoid has power over you. Everything you face strengthens you.
I think it's just obvious that your healing and growth tools should STRENGTHEN you.
Which means they won't necessarily make you feel better right in the moment.
Which is why the New Age/Wellness/Live Your Best Life Industry is so FULL of tools that rely on spiritual by-pass.
Which gets confusing.
This is how I handle it:
Inner Work is uncomfortable.
Working with your dream feels good. It's creative and hopeful and casts a bright light.
So the trick is to COMBINE this Inner Work with the Dream Work. And then combine both with the Outer Work of pursuing your creative projects and making changes in your life.
That way it's not just you and your discomfort - you're bringing in light and healing and magic and creativity and possibility to the process.
You are seeing - AND USING - the benefits of the Inner Work right away. This makes it easier to KEEP GOING.
This is the work that will grow your dreams, but it's also what will save us all.
(And yes - this is what I teach, and what we do together side-by-side, in Dream Book)
Creative Genius Planning Sessions are about doing your weekly planning from your most wise, brave and creative self. You get to your next level wth your dreams by being your next-level self, doing next-level things.
This is a 15 minute journaling + meditation practice for doing your Creative Genius Planning:
(If you've already watched it and don't need the into - skip ahead to 1:45)
Get the full Creative Genius Planning Sessions inside Dream Book
There are six additional videos there, for planning your week when:
Yikes!
The original version of this planner had mistakes!
I'm really sorry about this. Of course I triple-checked everything and of course these things got through.
Mistakes do happen and I hope that as you use the Year of Dreams 2022, these mistakes can be a reminder to you that your mistakes are ok. Mistakes are a part of the process.
The January, July and October monthly calendars are wrong.
If you purchased the printable:
log in to your account for updated files - there are a few different ways you can use them.
If you purchased the printed book:
You can print out the new calendars, cut them out on the black lines, and glue them over the calendars in your book.
This means you still have the coloured backgrounds, and the calendars will be accurate. (If you're not quite following me, scroll down for photos)
Also - you can use washi tape for cute edges!
Download the new calendars here:
Instructions:
Print out the new calendars, and cut out along the black lines:
Find the appropriate page in your planner:
Glue the printed calendar over the one in the book:
Optional: Decorate with washi tape.
Or get creative with it - it's your creative planner!
Again, I am SO SORRY about this.
There is a notice about this on the Year of Dreams 2022 page - it takes a few days for updates to work their way through the system and make it into printed books, so don't buy the printed version right now. I'll take that notice down once the revised version is being printed.
One of Peter Nygard's buildings burnt down, on the day of the full moon in October.
Peter Nygard, a well documented serial rapist and sex trafficker, who at the time of writing this was custody here in Winnipeg (he has since been moved to Toronto), had an apartment in this building which had been his home here for the last 40 years (though he also has homes elsewhere in the province and the world - most notably the private island in the Bahamas where he lured and trapped his victims).
That building is not too far from my home and I woke up to the smell of smoke that morning.
When I found out what the fire was about, it was satisfying to know his only home in my city was burning to the ground. It felt like just rewards but it also felt like "thank God that monster doesn't have a home here anymore" even though he is an old man and even with the most lenient sentencing, I don't believe he'll ever be out of jail.
So I shared the news article about this on my personal Facebook page.
Which always sparks discussion, especially here in Winnipeg where he was from. THIRTY YEARS AGO I was taking fashion tech classes and being warned about him by my teachers, because he is the biggest employer in this city in the fashion industry and as a young woman, if I was going to work for him I had to be careful.
Women have been warning other women about predators for so long.
Meanwhile, our culture nurtures them.
This man amassed a fortune that gave him the opportunity, resources and power to traffic women internationally for over thirty years.
This is insane.
We all know this.
It feels so hopeful to see the tides begin to turn, to see this man in custody.
And this reckoning is BIG. Much bigger than this one predator.
And it sparks A LOT.
It's totally normal to feel.... feelings. Grief or anger or joy that he is caught, or fear or terror.
It's also normal to go numb and not want to feel anything.
This is BIG and our feelings about it may also be BIG. They may feel like more than we can handle.
This is a healing process that is feels personal and collective at the same time.
And it's political. Like most healing is.
My business is the Creative Dream Incubator, my expertise is helping creative people navigate the inner and outer growth it takes to pursue a dream.
And this is a part of it.
Because we don't dream in a vacuum, we dream in this world. In this sick culture that allows horrific things to go on and on and on and on.
One part of working with our dreams is saying NO to the ways this culture wants to tell you who you are, and what you are capable of.
This is on a personal level like if your 3rd grade teacher said you're not that good at art and to this day your inner critic uses that as fuel to stop you from being the artist that you are.
And it's on a collective level like this agreement we seem to have that it's ok for women to not be fully safe in this world.
And then that collective also impacts you personally. And the ways it impacts you personally CAN cause you to uphold these sick agreements.
Like - they feed each other. In so many ways on so many levels.
One of the ways this happens in the New Age Community is where we gaslight each other with Love & Light.
So when I shared my post about Peter Nygard - and I wasn't even sharing GLEE about his home burning down, just that it felt right to me - an old friend from the new age community I used to be a part of (someone I hadn't seen in at least 11 years) came in to let me know that I shouldn't "stoop to his level" by sharing this, that I must be "spiritually disconnected" and that we need to "remain loving and trust those powers to be just."
This is really where the New Age goes with this Love & Light as gaslighting - the idea that sharing the news that this building burned down and feeling like this is his just rewards is somehow equal to over thirty years of international sex trafficking and serial rape.
I mean.
The New Age, in it's fear of human beings having human feelings, is DANGEROUS. This is exactly the attitude that ALLOWS sex trafficking to go on for over 30 years.
Also, to remain calm and loving in the face of abuse is more likely a trauma response than spiritual enlightenment.
The New Age Community never had the skills to handle human beings having human feelings because - as I have written about before here, here and here - it's all cherry-picked culturally appropriated practices taken entirely out of context.
We need to make space for our feelings. This is what helps us be fully human. This is what helps us BE as powerful as we actually ARE. Avoiding weakens us, facing strengthens us.
We need to not try to gaslight other people who are having feelings. We need to recognize that they are strong enough to deal with their feelings, work through then, and come out even stronger on the other side.
If you feel you can't handle your feelings - by all means get help. I know therapy is expensive, you can also seek out other forms of support, like a lot of women's centres and community centres have free support groups. Or get some books from the library about trauma. Don't trust everyone who calls themselves "trauma informed" to actually BE trauma informed, but get in there, start learning so you can face and heal your traumas that stop you from being able to handle your feelings.
Being "spiritually evolved" so you don't have to feel your feelings is NOT healthy. Not for you or for our culture. And it actually stifles your dreams.
One of the ways we change the culture is by doing our own work, by learning how to be our true selves out loud in the world.
This is the "big umbrella dream" that ALL other dreams fall under: Everything that calls you, everything you wish for, is a piece of this puzzle of what it means for you to truly be YOU - free of all the ways this world has tried to change you or cage you.
Being your true self out loud is complex and multi-facted but one part of it is definitely being a human being with human feelings.
This does NOT mean throwing them at other people or using your feelings as an excuse for poor behaviour or getting stuck or lost in your feelings.
Allowing your feelings means congruence. Honesty. WHOLENESS.
Of course you're angry sometimes.
Of course you're sad sometimes.
Of course you feel righteous sometimes.
These are human feelings and appropriate responses to the things we encounter in this world.