(Since my year-long project on exploring my resistance has me getting more organized as a way of supporting my creative flow, I am going through things I have written. I wrote this one a few years ago and then never shared it!)
Journal Prompts for when you're so stuck you can't do anything but you also can't just give it up
I went to see a friend I hadn't seen in a long time.
In the time I hadn't seen her, she sold her business, retired, moved, and dealt with several family illnesses and deaths.
She was telling me about her new creative dream - to write a book. It's a very specific book, and as she was telling me about it I realised.... she had told me about this before. Before all these big changes, before the pandemic.
She kind of winced. "Yeah, I have been wanting to do this a long time. I mean... I did write one chapter."
But the way she said "I did write one chapter" discounted what she was saying. Like, because she didn't make the progress she wanted to make, the progress she DID make is not valid.
We were quiet for a minute and then she said "It's just so hard"
I've heard that so many times from so many people and each and every one of them felt ALONE in it.
Like everyone else is happily writing and creating and getting things done and they are just all alone in finding this all kind of hard.
But it's hard for everyone.
It's hard for everyone and that hard is magnified by feelings of shame and failure and being all alone in it.
This is why I do my work in an ongoing community - so you can see that others are on the path with you and help normalize that it's just hard. (Join us here, it's amazing!)
When you accept that it's just hard then you don't have to get all emotionally tangled up about it being hard.
You don't have to be STUCK in the hard.
You can just face the hard parts and move through them. You take your power back. (I know it's not quite that simple, but I have a lot of tools to help you do this in Dream Book. It's absolutely do-able, with some time and work.)
It's hard because it's vulnerable.
Listening to your dreams is some of the most vulnerable work you can do. It touches on your deepest inner stuff because it pushes you to be more authentic in how you're showing up in your life.
That's vulnerable because of the reasons WHY you're not already being more authentic, creative, powerful and brave in how you're showing up in your life.
This is all very deep down hard wired and mostly lives in the shadows where you can't see it.
Working with your dreams makes it more visible because your dreams push up against this and asks you to bring healing and new possibilities to these places inside you.
So: Journal Prompts for when you're so stuck you can't do anything but you also can't just give it up:
Where are things really hard for you right now with your dream?
How does this feel? Where is this feeling in your body?
Stay with this. DO NOT move ahead to the next prompts, don’t try to get to the solution. Stay with the feelings until you feel you have fully described them. For bonus points: can you actually FEEL the feelings? Notice where they are in your body and focus on those sensations.
What are the other thoughts, feelings and questions that come up when you sit with how hard things are with your dream?
How can you validate all of these ways that you react to it being hard?
I can tell you: your thoughts, feelings and reactions ARE VALID. This is hard stuff! You’re doing great! But how can you validate this for yourself?
How can you think of yourself as a success for staying with this?
If you’re feeling like you’ve failed because this feels stuck, can you instead see yourself as being IN PROCESS? Instead of seeing yourself as stuck, can you see yourself as being incredibly brave because you’re still showing up?
Can you remember that creative dreaming is about answering your soul’s calling which includes a lot of inner healing and growth, and that your dreams often push you to face all the hardest things you have to face, all of the things you would much rather avoid, and so: it’s not that you are struggling with this, it’s that this is inherently experiment difficult work and no one moves through it in a linear way?
No one moves through it as quickly as they would like to. No one “feels successful” while they are in the middle of it. AND YET YOU ARE SUCCESSFUL BECAUSE YOU’RE STILL HERE.
How can you offer love to the places in you that are hurting with all of this?
How can you offer love to the places in you where you feel stuck and small?
Really sit with this. Be with the sensations in your body, ask yourself what you need and give yourself some time to find an answer that feels right for you.
Can you trust that your inner genius is guiding you?
And that this means: if you have some really hard stuff going on and you feel stuck, that maybe being with this stuck is the right thing for you do right now? Can you see this as a part of your path?
Somewhere inside you, you do know how to work with this obstacle. What would help you get in touch with this part of you?
HINT: It’s RELALY hard to do this work when you are avoiding anything that you’re feeling. So you may need to repeat this process a few times before you start to get in touch with the answers… but I promise they are inside you.
Want more help with this?
If you're in Dream Book, you have a whole library of inner work practices here.
If you're not in Dream Book, check out my free courses, which include a healing circle for working through the hard stuff.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
This is an old photo of my old workspace, but the creative mess really matched how I am feeling.
It’s a sleepy morning. I open my journal and feel wildly grateful for the Dream Book journaling kit because I have some structure and a helpful question to start with, instead of a blank page.
This is so good!
Two minutes later I am on my phone, googling tinted moisturizers.
It’s partly resistance.
But another part is that I am trying to have a specific kind of day, doing a specific kind of work, and that’s just not where my energy is at. I’m trying to get myself to where I want to be, rather than be where I am.
Monday mornings I want to (?) (should?) do planning and strategizing and I am really not feeling it. Especially after a weekend of relaxing, a slower start would make more sense. Like - unfocused creative work. Journaling, writing, or working on artwork that is already planned.
If you are a regular reader then you know - this is not a new dynamic for me!
And I SOLVED this dynamic by moving my weekly planning to Friday.
And it took a few weeks for me to really get into it, but once I got to a place where I was consistently planning on Fridays everything was working better.
And now here we are, back at stage one. Arriving at Monday morning with no plan and no head for planning. So of course I’d rather just google tinted moisturizers than figure out how I am going to do the things I want to do.
I don’t share these things for sympathy.
I honestly don’t want sympathy or empathy or anything.
This is just my process. I’m fine with it.
I share these things to say: THIS IS WHAT THE PROCESS LOOKS LIKE.
I am a person who has successfully supported herself with her creative dreams for the last 13 years.
And this is what that looks like some days.
This is completely natural and ok and I am still going to get to where I want to be. Maybe I won’t get there today, but that’s fine.
We have this sense that if we can’t get our shit together and keep it together when we’ll never succeed with anything.
But this is just not true.
I can know better and NOT do better. And I can just keep showing up and working on it.
The process is messy.
And I am well aware that I could be more organized about how I run my business.
I could run it like an actual business, lol.
But I’m a mentor, writer and artist. I’m really good at these things and I also - these are the things I want to do.
I don’t want to be a CEO. I don’t want to set up a whole business that has so much structure that I always know what to do on any given day because it’s been planned out months in advance.
My definition of success includes space to flounder.
A lot of growth and new ideas come from the floundering.
And it feels so important to me lately that we ACCEPT and CHERISH and HONOUR our process as it is.
That little voice that is always criticizing my way of doing things (”You aren’t organized enough!” “You’re too slow!”) has been getting quieter. The internalized rules about “how things should be done” feel less relevant than they ever have.
I love this.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
This is the mantra I got in this week’s journaling + alchemy kit: It’s easy for me to have what I want.
This is a hard one!
In the message I send out with this one I talk about how much this one has PUSHED me.
Remembering that with these mantras we are never trying to force ourselves to feel a certain way or pretend to have a belief we don’t genuinely have. We are exploring, learning more about ourselves and how to bring ourselves more of what we want and need.
It’s easy for me to have what I want. I mean it would be amazing to feel this way all the time.
And we have to recognize that, in the culture we live in with intersecting systems of privilege and oppression, the more intersections of privilege you have the easier this one is to believe because invisible systems really are making it easier for you to get what you want.
So if this one feels really hard for you, that’s not necessarily on you.
Recognizing where dominant culture makes it harder for you to receive what you want is not “playing the victim” or “being negative” - it’s having clear sight.
And with clear sight you can see the path much better.
AND of course we might have places in us that believe that it's "just too hard" to go after the things we really want, and it's our work to detangle those beliefs.
So this is a tricky one.
One question it brings up is - how do we open up more space for receptivity?
I did a receptivity call last year - the replay is very helpful! I do a mini version of that practice most mornings before I get out of bed. We can practice and learn to BECOME more receptive, we’re not just stuck where we are with it.
What do you think?
When do you feel like it’s easy for you to receive what you want?
And when DON’T you?
And what could you do about that?
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
Note: This is a post about my daily practice with my Creative Dreams - I often link to the tools, courses and processes I use which are available to Dream Book members. If you're not a member, find out more + join us here.
On Fridays I do my Dream Status Report which is a series of prompts I use every week to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path. You can do them with me (Dream Book members: come post yours in the forum!)!
My Dream Status Report for this week:
PART ONE:
My dream is: This one doesn't want to be shared, but I do have a very specific thing I am working on now.
I want it because: I am excited about it! And it feels supportive of all the other things I want - like having this puts me in a position for all sorts of new dreams.
When I have it I will feel: Free - and I feel free now but it feels like I would feel more free somehow.
PART TWO:
Invite the soul of your dream in (using the Dream Lab practice) to help you with the rest of the prompts.
My dream is a bird, very still like maybe it's a statue, on a pedestal. It's gorgeous, energy is sparkling and flowing around it. When I ask for it's help with these prompts, it opens its eyes and smiles.
I am always here, always helping. You don't have to ask.
PART THREE:
Last week’s focus was: Keep doing the worthiness + receptivity daily practice. Be more disciplined about fresh air + exercise. These super boring self care things make the magic happen!
What happened in the last week?
So much fresh air and exercise! Feeling energized and enthusiastic!
I created a new journaling sheet - Taking Consistent Steps!
I started it as a "daily practice helper" which is what I was needing - but at the Hello 2024 call we talked about it, and I realized it works just as well if you're taking steps every day or once a week, so it's more about taking little steps and having them add up to movement towards your dream. Kind of like the Focus Pocus program, but in a more casual, ongoing way.
I feel like every week I put a few new pieces into place for the dream of having my work be more organized. I have so many ideas!! So I am slowly creating containers for each idea to give it space to grow, and each week I learn more about how I want to organize my time.
It feels like slow, boring progress and it really delights me, lol!
What am I learning/How do I feel about this?
I just marvel at how well so many things are coming together. I feel good in my life and excited about where it's going.
What do I need now?
Just keep honouring myself where I am, practicing all the good and boring self care, and keep taking consistent steps.
What does my dream need now?
The bird gives me a smile. It's fine. As boring as this project of "creating better systems and structure for every part of my business" really is, it supports my creativity in such a deep way, and my dream is just happy I keep working at this.
Taking all of this into account, my focus for the next week is:
Enjoy the process.
I gotta say, this whole report feels to BORING and I LOVE IT. After such a difficult fall, a boring restful winter is a FUCKING DELIGHT.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls.
Being optimistic enough to have a dream and go after it is brutal some days.
Your dream will break your heart.
It will ask you to be braver than you think you can be.
It will push you to face all the things you’d rather avoid.
It will ask you to keep going when you want to give up.
The days where it all feels impossible are not the days when you’re failing.
Those are times of healing, reckoning and growth.
This is the work.
As we get this new year started, there can be pressure to already know your goals and plans for the year. To already be on the way to SUCCESS!
But maybe that’s not the season you’re in.
Dominant culture expects us to always be on, always be productive.
Most healing and personal development are expecting you to be a constant upward trajectory, manifesting everything your heart’s desires, 24/7.
THIS IS ABSOLUTE BULLSHIT.
I just want you (and me!) to recognize how brave you are for having a dream.
For seeing a way of creating a better future, and believing in it.
For showing up, and taking the little steps.
This is magic.
And a part of making any dream happen is being with all of the stuff that comes up when your dream does break your heart.
Sitting with it. Feeling your feelings. Tending to the tender places.
This work is ongoing.
It’s so easy to feel like “Oh I’ve dealt with that” or “I should be further along at this point” but the work is ongoing.
The other day my therapist asked me “Do you think you’ll be DONE some day? Like, no more feelings? No more learning or growing? Are you trying to figure EVERYTHING out RIGHT NOW?”
Yikes.
It’s so easy to forget that this work is ongoing.
Most of the people I work with in Dream Book have been doing this work for decades. Lots of them are healers, coaches, therapists and mentors. They are so smart! They have great tools! They help other people overcome huge stuff every day and… their own work is ongoing.
Just like my work is ongoing.
This will be discouraging at times but please don’t give up.
The work is ongoing.
Your dream is how your soul calls you toward your true self and this is a life-long journey.
Dream Book members: if this work feels fucking brutal for you right now - remember the Creative Dream Alchemy Library of Inner Work Practices!
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
Hi resistance. I feel so lost today.
Resistance is a little sleepy and confused (like me, actually). You’re reaching out to me about this?
Well I’m not sure who else to reach out to?
I mean - your wisest self, bravest self, most energized self, most creative self… there are lots of yous who are equipped to help with this. I’m an interesting choice.
Yeah. But you’re who came to mind, so - I feel lost today. What do you think?
Is LOST really the best description? If BEING WITH helps us MOVE THROUGH and staying vague and not present is a way to make everything harder… which are you doing when you say you’re lost?
The second one. More specifically I feel anxious, and tired, and spacey, and like why bother doing anything anyway when everything is so hard?
What’s hard?
Silence.
Because I saw you getting ready for the day. Picking out clothes, packing your stuff for the coffee shop, excited about your projects. I see your life, and how things are actually going really well for you. So what’s hard?
I just feel like I’m in quicksand this morning.
Which is what resistance feels like.
Yup. This feels so convoluted because I feel like I am me, and you are my resistance - only I’m the one in resistance? But this is what I mean about how I feel today. Everything is all screwed up. I can’t even talk to my own self without it being all convoluted.
Oh honey. She gives me a hug and I start to cry. Your feelings are valid, you know. Everything I said about things going well, that’s all true, and it doesn’t mean you won’t have a lot of uncomfortable feelings anyway.
Yeah. Ugh. Now my back is hurting, I hate this chair.
Resistance rubs my back.
OK obviously I miss having a really affectionate partner. I don’t get hugs and backrubs and this sucks.
Yes, sweetie, that sucks.
Ok acknowledging that feels better. It feels so tangly because I also don’t want a partner right now.
Yeah for sure! So where are you at now?
I guess the work I want to do feels HEAVY and BIG and I feel weak and small in comparison. Oh I guess heavy is the wrong word. It feels out of reach.
And isn't this exactly what you help people do? Do the things that feel out of reach?
Yeah.
So what are the tools you would suggest for this situation?
Oh wow, resistance is going to make me take my own medicine.
OK here are the tools I would suggest:
Making your trust in your dream bigger than your fears.
Dream Lab to ask the dream what you should do today.
Alchemy Process for working with overwhelm
Alchemy process for getting answers from your dream
Alchemy process for acclimating to your dream
I mean there are more actually but any of these would work. Though of course we should mention the video for when you’re in resistance.
"So what are you going to do?" Resistance asks.
Alchemy process for getting answers from your dream
My question is: I want to feel energized and creative and I want to be doing things! You know a huge part of my dream right now is simply acting on all of this inspiration but my progress is soooo sloooooow. How do I get there?
All of my anxiety and tangled feelings are here with me in the meditation. Feels good to include them and not try pretend to be somewhere I’m not.
The field of creative dream alchemy feels like spring. A meadow full of flowers, soft light. My mood shifts so much through the grounding and connecting parts.
My dream shows up as a blue bird. Like a cartoon super bright blue birds. Oh there are a whole bunch of them! Maybe I’m Snow White? They fly around me. But as they do, they are guiding me out of the meadow, onto a path in the woods.
The birds are flying and moving. In circles often, but also they are getting somewhere. In the part of the meditation where I talk about how the dream shows up in the meditation I get it - my dream is showing me to JUST GET MOVING.
Laying in the field of flowers is great and important and we should do it every day AND ALSO let’s get on the path and get moving, let’s do that every day too.
I have to pause the meditation often, to be with my own experience without my voice in my ears.
I give my question to the birds and they can’t quite hold it. It’s too heavy. There is this struggle and it’s like - I can’t be fully connected to my dream AND be in this question.
The question starts to lighten up and I look more closely and see some bees are there, pouring honey on it.
It’s getting sweeter and lighter.
Now the birds can carry it. And they put it at the top of a very tall tree.
And I get this whole new idea: A notebook of SELF CARE PROTOCOLS.
Like: if I wake up feeling lost: this is what I do.
When I feel anxious: this is what I do.
Etc.
I mean, I have had SO MANY versions of this so many times in my life.
I need a new one for where I am now.
I sit with this and realize - I am still operating on some pre-pandemic protocols. The thing where getting up and GETTING MOVING helps me get into the mindset I want/need to be in for my work. My pre-pandemic self almost always had the ability to get myself moving no matter how lost or heavy I felt on any given morning.
What if I be sweet to myself, and recognize that who I am today today doesn’t have that ability?
Like sure, do that when I can because it works for me!
But on the days when I can’t - what’s the protocol then? I need clear plans or else my mood takes over planning my day and that will never go well.
I’ve been sitting with this question and only one idea is coming to me: make art. Make myself a latte, and a smoothie or whatever food I feel like, put on comfy clothes, get my art box and big sketchbook journal, put on soothing music, lay on the floor and make art. Express my feelings.
OK this feels embarrassing.
I mean - this is nothing I don’t already know about myself.
BUT/AND
Some days we can’t access the things we know.
Some days we can’t be our “best selves”.
And since I am in the process of planning calls for 2024 - I am going to do one on creating self care protocols for those times when you are not at your best.
Update: I added that call to the library!
I added 4 new calls this week:
Feb 15: Exploring Resistance and Creative Flow
March 12: Taking Inner Work Deeper
April 9: Letting Your Dream Come To You Instead of Chasing After It
May 15: Creating Self Care Protocols That Help You Be The Version Of You Who Can Do Your Dream
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
In the fall, when everything in my life felt so hard, I was looking forward to winter.
I love winter anyway, but this year I was really craving the quiet and stillness of it.
The magic of sleeping in a bit and still being able to walk to the coffee shop during the sunrise.
The spaciousness of early sunsets and quiet evenings at home.
And how magic and spaciousness are so healing for me.
Last night I was lying in bed, and my furnace kicked on.
My heart actually exploded in gratitude. I wanted to cry. I was so amazed and grateful that I have my own furnace. It’s only job is to keep me warm.
I felt so loved and safe.
Just from having a furnace. The same furnace I’ve been glad to have, but mostly taken for granted for years.
And I thought about how much I love everything about my home, not just the furnace, how I am not taking it for granted. Something about going through a divorce has me more present with all of the things I love about my life.
There is magic in a breakup because there is healing in a breakup.
And as long as I stay present with my feelings, not denying the hard parts but also not wallowing in them - I get to have all of this magic, too.
My life feels bigger. I feel bigger. Possibility feels bigger.
And it’s so wild to me since I didn’t choose this divorce. But I feel healed and freed by it, too.
And I want to add - in therapy we’ve been looking at all the ways I did contribute to the divorce, not a blaming way, I don’t want to blame or or blame him, just in a way that comes back to this truth: what is best for one is best for both.
AND this is all a part of creative dreaming.
I'm been committed to having my inner truth guide my actions, and so - if I am doing my best with that, then I need to accept the outcomes as they happen.
The path doesn’t look the way we think it will. This is true for most dreams.
I am thinking about how often our creative dreams do fall apart, just like marriages, and how this is all a part of it.
If nothing ever falls apart, there is no space for anything new!
I wrote this a few weeks ago, but now I see how it fits with my work right now of creating a container for my dreams to grow, and how I MAKE SPACE for them.
Dream Book members: there is a mini-class on For When Your Dream Falls Apart.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
(Dream Book members: get your next journaling kit, with alchemy meditations here)
This week’s journaling + alchemy kit gave me this: I make space for miracles.
I actually made mugs, notebooks + zipper pouches with this on them, and I use this mug every day.
This is my mantra.
And yet, it was really hard for me to feel this one, this week.
The start of last week felt like a slog with no miracles in sight. I felt like I didn’t want to MAKE SPACE for miracles, I didn’t want to be the one doing that work, I wanted the miracles to find me.
Which is valid!
AND it’s not usually how miracles work.
By the end of the week I realised two things:
- The way I am planning my weeks and setting goals isn’t working for me. AND I have an idea for what would work!!! It’s like, I noticed exactly what is missing for me (which is a tiny miracle!). So I am going to try that for this week and this feels so exciting to me.
- I’m not actually MAKING SPACE for what I want. I have this specific dream I am working on, but I have no container for supporting it.
I am still figuring out what that second one means.
But this is something that comes up from time to time in Dream Book - how are you making space for your dream in your life? There are a LOT of ways to do this and what I am feeling right now is that HAVING A CONTAINER for it feels important.
The work of MAKING SPACE is so varied.
Sometimes we are literally too busy for our dream to fit in our lives. Sometimes we have to give other things up in order to have it. Sometimes we just need to notice the ways it’s growing, like a houseplant that is growing, but crowded by other plants, maybe you just need to move it a little.
When I say I need a container for my dream to grow in - I have no idea what this means. Is it a literal container? Like a file box to keep things in? Is it a practice, a way of showing up for it every day and noticing?
It feels like a journaling process. That’s all I know.
So I am making a page for it in Dream Book - the page is a proxy for the container for supporting the growth of my dream. And I’ll just sit with it regularly and see what comes next.
This is a big part of creative dreaming. Being willing to sit with things that you can’t see or understand yet.
This is how we make space to operate from a new level of consciousness.
Which is what making space for miracles is all about.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
Note: This is a post about my daily practice with my Creative Dreams - I often link to the tools, courses and processes I use which are available to Dream Book members. If you're not a member, find out more + join us here.
On Fridays I do my Dream Status Report which is a series of prompts I use every week to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path. You can do them with me (Dream Book members: come post yours in the forum!)!
My Dream Status Report for this week:
PART ONE:
My dream is: This one doesn't want to be shared, but I do have a very specific thing I am working on now.
I want it because: I am excited about it! And it feels supportive of all the other things I want - like having this puts me in a position for all sorts of new dreams.
When I have it I will feel: Free - and I feel free now but it feels like I would feel more free somehow. And more secure/safe and relaxed.
PART TWO:
Invite the soul of your dream in (using the Dream Lab practice) to help you with the rest of the prompts.
OK wow. When I tried to do this I was just bombarded with distractions, everyone I know suddenly had to call or text me, lol.
So, I keep trying. And it's actually hard to connect with my dream today and I realize... oh there are just so many feelings in the way. I'm just tender today AND I had a lot of things I wanted to get done today and this is not a good combination. So I just sit with this. All of the tenderness in my heart and all of the wishes that I felt more... sturdy and focused, I guess.
My dream feels like a faraway soft warm light. Inviting me towards it and understanding that I am where I am today.
PART THREE:
Last week’s focus was:Remember the magic. Keep doing the worthiness + receptivity daily practice.
What happened in the last week?
The worthiness + receptivity daily practice is from what we did in the worthiness and receptivity calls we did last year, I am doing just a quick version of getting into that feeling. This week I made printables from both of those calls and added them so you can download them - underneath the call replay. The printable is a way of tracking your practice with this over time.
The dream I am working with now is starting to feel more and more inevitable. I love this.
Apart from that, this week was a little rough mental health wise. I stopped going out for long walks as much when the cold hit late last week and that has such a HUGE impact. I went for a long walk yesterday and it changed everything so I need to keep it up. I do have all the layers I need to do this, I just need the motivation to put them all on, lol. But remember how much better I feel after I do this (even if I'm not that into it while it's happening!) is good motivation.
I am SO happy and proud of my new ways of organizing my thoughts and ideas into my projects. I have so many "journal ideas" for little printable kits and guided journals, and things to add to Dream Book. I structure this all much better, between keeping lists in my project management app and then also having documents ready in Procreate (the app I use for drawing in my iPad) with all of my notes in them. This way I can pick it up and JUST DRAW without having to "figure out where I am". This feels like a miracle.
Recently we did the Structure, Habits Routines call. Plus there is the Creative Planning + Project Management class in the Dream Plan Kit and the Creative Genius Planning Sessions. There really isn't one way to structure your ideas in a way that will help you implement them. This can be ongoing work - especially as your circumstances change throughout life!
What am I learning/How do I feel about this?
Ever since the pandemic started I've been foggy brained. The overwhelm makes sense, with peri-menopause on top. And perhaps long Covid? My brain is not the same. So it's been SUCH A GIFT to finally start to get my ideas organized in a way that feels right for where I am now.
What do I need now?
A bit more discipline about going for the long walks. It helps to plan in advance. When I am ore disciplined about getting fresh air and exercise, then I am also naturally more disciplined about doing the things I want to do. The exercise fuels my creative projects.
What does my dream need now?
That far-away light glows brighter. It wants me to remember it is closer than I think.
Taking all of this into account, my focus for the next week is:
Keep doing the worthiness + receptivity daily practice. Be more disciplined about fresh air + exercise. These super boring self care things make the magic happen!
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls.
This is where I keep stumbling:
I am forgetting the magic of little steps.
I know this is kind of funny given how often I write about it. And how I am ALWAYS coaching others to look for smaller steps. And then smaller still.
But here I am, discounting my own little steps.
I think this is a part of the nature of being creative: we see the big picture. I can see how I want it to be and so each little step really is unsatisfying… if I stay focused on the bigger picture.
So here are so tiny steps I took:
- I got my paints out from the bottom of my closet and put them in front of my bookshelf, to I could start working on that mural in my workspace.
- I pulled that bookshelf out to make some room to get back there and paint.
- I brought a chair upstairs to stand on to paint.
With these three things done, each as separate steps at separate times, at one point I just… started painting!!!!
It’s easy to see “paint one little bit” as a little step, but it took three other steps to get there. And it would have take more steps if all of my paint stuff for this project hadn’t already been together in one box in my closet.
What I want to work on is having an attitude that CELEBRATES and HONOURS the tiniest little steps.
I don’t want to wait until I see new paint on the wall to acknowledge that I am DOING IT.
AND
I wrote this a week ago.
In the week since, I have done VERY LITTLE on the mural. For various and very valid reasons.
But that doesn't discount the success of those steps I took last week.
And it doesn’t change the fact that I am still set up to take more little steps.
This attitude of CELEBRATING and HONOURING the tiniest little steps that I want to have is a part of CHERISHING THE PROCESS.
Our whole culture tells us that the outcome is the only thing that matters. And that a story, like the one I shared above, is only inspirational if it ends up that I completed the mural in record time.
The truth about creativity and human nature and life under colonialist capitalism is that it doesn’t usually work that way, and having a goal of wanting it to work that way for you gets in the way of ACTUAL PROGRESS.
So what’s the tiniest step you can see to take?
And can you make it even smaller?
And then can you celebrate yourself for taking it, even when it doesn’t get you all of the way to where you want to be? Can you celebrate the direction you’re going in instead of focusing on the speed?
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.