Healing

This is what I’m holding onto right now

Before I jump in - e-course bundle sale is ending TODAY.

This is a bundle of art e-courses valued at over £2900+ GBP, but - for one more day only - is sold for only £75 GBP! (In USD that's a value of roughly $4,000 for $104)

Two of my courses - the Creative Dream Incubator ($147 USD value) and the Creative Business Incubator ($199 USD value) are a part of the

holding on

WHAT YOU ARE FEELING IS NORMAL.

I'm feeling like this needs to be said more often. Like too many of us are feeling all alone in our feelings by feeling WRONG for feeling all the things we're feeling.

You're not wrong.

What you're feeling is normal. All of it. Even the parts that conflict with each other.

Here's what I'm feeling this morning:

  • A sense that I call "cognitive shut down" where my brain just CAN NOT
  • A wish to feel hopeful for the future
  • But then also a feeling that feeling hopeful is dangerous, too vulnerable, and that those hopes will soon be dashed so why bother
  • A deeper desire/need to FEEL GOOD AGAIN as my baseline feeling
  • Sadness about not feeling good
  • Grief about everything I've lost
  • Panic about everything I could lose next
  • Relief that my husband's health emergency from last week is still serious but not an emergency this week

But I've also had these moments of feeling more creative, peaceful and powerful than I have in a long time.

It can be so confusing to have so many conflicting feelings going on.

But this is what it means to be human.

We live in a culture that teaches us to NOT feel.

But denying our human feelings doesn't dissolve them, they just go underground where they control most of our behaviour, limit our possibilities and just generally do a lot of harm.

And now we're in this time when we can't keep stuffing it all down. There's just too much.

Every breaking point is also a doorway into a new possibility.

That's not just some bullshit thing people say to try to gloss over how hard the breaking point is.

It's the truth.

The degree to which we can be present with the hard parts determines the amount of new possibilities we can receive from the experience.

I mean - it takes work and support and courage. But the opportunity is there.

That's what I am holding onto right now.

I'm grateful for those moments of creativity and clear thinking and feeling peaceful and powerful and like I can do anything. I am using those moments to take care of my business and move important projects forward.

And in the rest of my time, I am resting and making art just for me and reading a lot and also reminding myself that there is an opportunity here.

That "my stuff is up" and I can see it more clearly than ever which means this is an opportunity for healing.

That I can emerge from this difficult time with less of my stuff weighing me down.

Things are hard anyway, why not go on a full on journey through my own underworld and see what I can clean up?

I had a breakthrough yesterday.

I had a breakthrough yesterday.

I hit (another!) pandemic wall on the weekend and I did the things that help best when I am in Full On Overwhelm. I finished my day with a hot lavender bath, I did yoga and meditated, and I went to bed early.

Normally, this helps me wake up the next day ready to take on the world. Yesterday, I woke up still crabby. And as my day went on I stayed crabby - even though I was doing all the things that usually help.

My husband (who is STILL working from home) noticed, of course, and towards the end of the day came upstairs to tell me a silly story in the hopes of cheering me up. That's when I started crying.

"Sweetie, what's wrong? I'm trying to cheer you up."

I realised later, that it was because I was touched by him trying to cheer me up, that I finally felt some of what I was actually feeling. That all that crabbiness and overwhelm was really more about having-so-many-feelings-I-can't-feel-anything and being all bottled up, emotionally.

And expecting my usual self care routines to take care all of this right now is unrealistic. I need more.

That's the breakthrough. To look for ways to double my self care.

The best breakthroughs seem boring and obvious once you've had them. But nevertheless, they change everything.

So I doubled up on my self care practices and gave myself more space to be where I am and I woke up this morning feeling more clear and grounded and I am remembering - we just had 3 weeks of brutal winter weather, and everything is still closed.

Normally, I can go for walks in brutal winter weather. In -40s, I can bundle up and go for a 30 minute walk - I'll just be cold by the end of it. So I walk to a coffee shop/bakery with a wood fire oven. It's toasty warm in there, and in the coffee shop section they've got huge sunny windows and dozens of plants. The warmth, the sun, the plants, the coffee, the treats, the whole place smelling like whatever's baking - it's a pretty epic spot to do some journaling and writing. Plus I warm up enough to walk 30 minutes back home, no matter what the weather.

Bundling up to walk 15 minutes from home, then turn around and walk back, just doesn't have the same feel to it, you know? So I haven't been bothering to do it, and now I'm feeling the effects of not getting out at all.

Last weekend we went to my friend's farm.

Normally, my friend and I would have lunch or coffee together at least every other week, since she works in the city.

My husband is a traditional Cree medicine person. He received messages from some spirits who needed to be fed, so he needed space to have a sacred fire. So I spoke to my friend at the farm and she offered her space - provided we didn't go inside her home.

We were only there for about 2 hours, but it was AMAZING to see my friend again and just sit around and hang out (it was a warmer day and we had the fire going).

It was after that, that it hit me how much I've lost. And how very much I miss my people.

This turned up the volume on the I-Have-Too-Many-Feelings-I'm-All-Bottled-Up thing that was happening. It pushed it all over the edge.

It was my little breakthrough that helped me see this differently, helped me be more compassionate with myself. "Oh sweetie. Of course you're crabby. Look at what you've lost. Of course you're sad."

And now I feel ACCEPTING of my feelings. Like they're not all bottled up and I am not on the verge of exploding. I can just slow down and be more patient with myself.

It's a subtle shift in focus.

A shift from: "just keep going, you are one of the lucky ones, you have everything you need to get through this ok" which was only creating a backlog of un-felt feelings in me, which was making everything harder than it already was.

To: "Sweetie this is HARD, make space for all of these feelings" which helps me be more deeply present with ALL parts of me which plugs me back into my superpowers which is the thing that will actually help me move through this best.

And let's me clear: I knew this. I KNEW BETTER than to do what I was doing.

The breakthrough didn't teach me something I didn't already know.

It put me back in touch with that inner knowing in a way that it really LANDED.

And then I was able to make that change.

And now everything feels different for me. I have all these new options for how to move forward.

Breakthrough Alchemy Coaching Circle

The BREAKTHROUGH Alchemy Coaching Circle is this Saturday - on Feb 27.

A Breakthrough is a sudden shift in perspective, a radical new way of seeing yourself, or your situation.

A Breakthrough gives you new options that you didn't know you had, before the breakthrough.

A Breakthrough brings you back to your own truth.

I am not promising everyone who attends will have an instant breakthrough. I am hoping for that though!

What I AM promising is that attending the Circle, and then showing up for the next 30 days to keep working with it, will give you these things:

A radical new way of seeing yourself, or your situation
New options
A deeper connection to your own truth

Join me here.

There is no going back

There is no going back

My dream sent me this amazing vision.

It was me, sitting in the coffee shop I used to go to, in my favourite spot - at the bar along the window, in the corner. My journaling stuff was all spread out. I had a delicious cup of coffee in my hands and noise canceling headphones in my ears. Outside the window the sun was rising the the sky was soft pinks and blues and lavenders.

I was SO FREAKING HAPPY to be back there. To feel the magic of my familiar old pattern. It felt like a healing.

But then my dream arrived, in the form of sparkling golden stars. It landed in my heart and I grew 4 stories tall.

The coffee shop did not grow and I didn't fit inside it anymore.

There is no going back.

My dream asked "Why on earth would you want to go BACK??!? The way foreword is FORWARD."

And suddenly I saw it. I've been waiting to GO BACK to my old beloved routines. I've been waiting to GO BACK to my old life.

I wanted to go back to my old ME.

But there is no going back.

That's what all those FEELINGS were about in the spring and summer... it's grief. The world changed and there is no going back and we don't know what what's next. Also it's hard for those kinds of thoughts to not trigger fears about how the world will change again with climate change, which won't be as gentle with us as Covid has been.

But my dream put a much more positive spin on it.

This time is an incubator.

I am growing in ways I don't see yet.

And I get to choose who I'll be next.

I can't go back to who I was, because you can't un-grow.

But I can choose who I'll be next and I can choose HOW I'll grow.

I mean of course I'll go back to my beloved coffee shop morning routines, but I'll be a new me.

It's breakthrough time.

There are so many ways we can fuel our growth at this time.

And we do this NOT by forcing a positive spin on what's happening or hiding in conspiracy theories.

We do it by facing what's actually happening. And tending to our reactions to what's happening, and bringing love and gentleness to all of the places in us that get triggered and re-traumatized.

Because facing the hard stuff is a part of being with the truth.

And the truth is: You are more powerful that your obstacles. That your creative genius always knows a way.

And this is how you create your breakthrough.

Come do this with me at the BREAKTHROUGH Alchemy Coaching Circle on the February Full Moon. This will help you see your way into a new story of what is actually possible for you RIGHT NOW.

February 27, at 11:00 am (Central, North America).

The cost: $33 USD **As a part of my commitment to being the change I want to see in the world, I do NOT price my work "what it's worth". 

What's included: The live circle, plus access to the replay, complete with a private comments section for anything you want to discuss after.

Special bonus to help you move into that new story and make yourself at home: After the Breakthrough Alchemy Circle, you also get access to my Dream Book program for one month! This includes the miraculous Dream Book journaling system, daily online masterminds, weekly printable journaling kits, a monthly new moon coaching call and access to my entire library of e-courses. It’s like having a Creative Dream Coach on call 24-7.

Can't make it live? The recording will be available within hours of the end of the event - so you can do your circle whenever you like. And there IS a private comments section for the replay - so you can still add your ideas or questions or get extra support in there - you don't have to attend live to be a part of the group.

Grab your spot here.

You’re wrong about why you’re stuck

You’re wrong about why you’re stuck

The only people who never get stuck are the people who are not going after their dreams.

You get stuck. I get stuck. We all get stuck.

It's fine to be stuck.

BUT

You're wrong about WHY you're stuck.

You're not quite seeing a part of your path clearly or you're caught up in something from the past or you just don't know what you don't know.

But once you see it more clearly - you'll also know how to get un-stuck. Those two things tend to happen together and they create the foundation for your breakthrough.

It really is that simple.

Every time.

We just make it seem complicated with all of the layers of stories we make up about why we're stuck and we can't get un-stuck, and also with a stubborn refusal to look at the thing we most need to look at.

I am not saying that you are the SOURCE of your stuck.

I'm working on a longer blog to share about that later this week - how a lot of New Age/Life Coaching approaches to getting un-stuck assume that you are 100% the cause of your problem and that leaves you powerless to get un-stuck when the cause of the stuck is any kind of systemic oppression.

And so the places where you have a hard time getting un-stuck are likely the places where your own stucks are intersecting with some forms of oppression that you face living in a patriarchal capitalist white supremacist colonialist culture.

Which does NOT mean that you are powerless to do anything about those stucks. It just means you need to take a different approach. But, again, I'll share more about that later this week.

Think about the place where you're stuck right now.

Really take a good long look at it.

And then imagine being un-stuck. Take a good long look at what being un-stuck will be like and feel like for you.

Then look back:

What's between where you are now and where you'll be then?

That's your breakthrough.

I know, it's probably all fuzzy and unclear.

It's right in the middle of your blind spot so it's very hard to see on your own, which is why it's so easy to be stuck.

So.

Come to the BREAKTHROUGH Alchemy Coaching Circle for the February full moon!

(The cost is $33 USD, to reflect my commitment to BE the change I want to seeing the world, and not charge a fortune because I think breakthroughs should be affordable because we all need them!)

In the circle we'll go deeper into this and you'll have a chance to see your situation in a whole new light.

You'll leave the BREAKTHROUGH Alchemy Coaching Circle with:

  • Clarity. The kind of clarity where you KNOW FOR SURE what to do next. Either you'll just get un-stUck right away or you'll know HOW to work with your stuck, if it will take more time to clear it.
  • And you'll get whole month of support for DOING THAT THING in my online creative mastermind so you have space to create LASTING CHANGE for yourself.

Get your spot here.

This is what healing looks like

This is what healing looks like

This weekend I ordered take out from one of my favourite restaurants.

A woman met me at the door to ask my name. Through the window I saw her coming back out of the kitchen holding my order and it really hit me right in the feels.

These people cooked my favourite meal for me, and now this woman was walking back to the kitchen to bring it to me at the door, so I didn’t even have to go inside and we didn’t take a risk of infecting each other.
It all felt so beautiful I wanted to cry for a minute there. I felt so loved. And like we’re all in this together. My heart was sparkling the whole way back home

This was so far away from how I was feeling just the day before, when nothing was working and everything was overwhelming and all I could do was cry.

But this was also a direct result of me giving myself the space to feel how I feel when everything felt stuck.

Feel how you feel, and then let it go when it’s done. This is actually the best way to hold onto the gifts and lessons - by releasing the rest.

This really does open you up to all sorts of good feelings, like turning ordering take out into some kind of cosmic experience of love and connection.

But more importantly, it opens you up to YOURSELF.

Your wishes and dreams, your authenticity, your potential - and your inner wisdom which shows you how to get there.

This is what we’re doing today at the Healing Circle for 2020, making space for reflection, processing and release.

This will be about 60-90 minutes long, depending on the discussion. We'll do a special meditation with time for reflection on your 2020 and journaling and then an alchemical releasing process.

You'll leave with a few prompts to keep exploring over the next month, and to allow the healing and release to INTEGRATE, so you are ready for the Blessing Circle for 2021 that we’ll do in January.

I can’t wait!

Join me here.

Use your feelings as fuel to create a new future

Use your feelings as fuel to create a new future

I started the day an absolute MESS of feelings.

On top of the chaotic US election process, my city is now Canada's Covid hotspot. Our hospitals are at capacity, and our health care and social services have been absolutely GUTTED for the last several years by our conservative government for the last several years, leaving us completely vulnerable. Their response? They are asking for VOLUNTEERS for Covid testing and health care services.

They're not willing to spend any money to keep us safe. Meanwhile they have given millions upon millions to their friends for consultations while they were gutting everything.

I am incandescent with rage that we allow people with no compassion, vision or integrity to govern us. I am also so completely distracted by all the news I want to check my phone every five minutes to see what's new.

So this is the vibe I brought into my daily practice today.

Anger and fear and heartbreak and worry and determination and confusion and helplessness and hope and a wish that I could work on my creative projects but the kind of focus needed for that feels so far away.

So many conflicting feelings, with such intensity, I felt like all I could do today is bounce around in my emotional reactivity.

Five minutes into my practice, all that changed.

(This is why we ALL need a daily practice - to have this container ready and working for the days when we REALLY need it)

I received a clear + helpful message: USE your feelings as FUEL to create a new future.

This message felt revolutionary and super familiar at the same time.

I got out my iPad and wrote it down in block letters and then of course i saw it: This is what I have been teaching for the last 10 years.

It's landing differently right now because of what's happening in the world.

But the work hasn't changed.

More feelings = more fuel

A better world is possible. It will take creativity, vision, wisdom, hard work and collaboration to get there.

The first step: be with your feelings.

Move beyond emotional reactivity and sink into your deeper inner truth.

Then you can HARNESS the power of all of this energy, and use it to create something good.

You don't have to do it alone.

I can help - The Hard Parts Are Where The Magic Happens Healing Circle and Inner Work Workshop is a free 80 minute video class I offer where I lead you through this process.

I recorded this class a few years go. I think we need this work now more than ever.

Sign up below for instant access:

We need to feel our feelings, now more than ever

We need to feel our feelings, now more than ever
I ordered the noise-canceling headphones of my dreams and they were supposed to arrive yesterday.

There was all of this fortuitous synchronistic stuff happening around the purchase of the headphones, and the whole thing felt like an opportunity to step into my next-level future dream self.

The headphones represented spaciousness and ease and having my self care needs exquisitely met.

The headphones did not arrive.

When I checked the tracking, I saw that they had arrived in my city, and then were returned to sender. Also: no more of these particular headphones (this particular choice being ridiculously well-researched) were listed for sale on the website of the Canadian company I’d bought them from. (Yes, I can check other stores, but NO I will not shop at Amazon)

I was so frustrated and disappointed.

I cried.

And while I cried a part of me was like “WTF? Are you really this upset? We’ll find the headphones eventually”

But it wasn’t about the headphones. It was about feeling like I was stepping into that next level of having my self care needs be exquisitely met and then having it taken from me.

Feeling like I don’t deserve it.

And then feeling into all of the losses of this year.

And then remembering that my friend is gone and feeling terrified that people can just die.

An then I was like “Oh sweetie, I’m sorry, I get it, cry all you want”

So I did.

And when I was done crying I did some soothing yin yoga, kissed my husband goodnight, noticed how exquisitely my self care needs are already being met, and drifted off to sleep. I woke up feeling happy and inspired.

I see so many people asking for help dealing with their feelings, because 2020 has been so hard and we all have so many feelings.

But what most of them are really asking for is help DISTRACTING THEMSELVES or TURNING OFF their feelings.

We need to FEEL our feelings, now more than ever.

Un-felt feelings don’t magically disappear. They calcify in your inner landscape.

I’ve been helping people with this since 2008 because that calcification forms the basis of the INNER BLOCKS make it harder to pursue your dreams.

This calcification of un-felt feelings makes it harder for you to know your true self.

It makes it harder for you to act in integrity with who you really are - it keeps you in a life that is too small for who you really are.

It’s what is making parents say “but our children have lost so much already” and demand that Halloween go on without any changes, ignoring the facts about super spreader events.

It makes us entitled and greedy and short sighted and without empathy for those who are more vulnerable than we are. This is why our species are killing the only home we have. This is why white supremacy and colonization and capitalism and greed.

And this morning on social media what I kept seeing is people wishing for 2020 to end.

As though that is some kind of solution.

The end of 2020 is not a magical portal that’s going to bring us into a better place.

That’s not the way through.

People keep asking about the online healing circle I did where I lead you through the working through a difficult feeling to get to the other side of it and feel free. You can get instant access to it when you sign up for the Your Next Steps free course.

Working on your dream is high quality self care

Working on your dream is high quality self care

Today was not a good day. I woke up dizzy and overwhelmed.

It was really hard to find my creative flow and I was thinking... maybe I should just take the day off. You know - have a me day. Make popcorn, catch up on my Netflix queue.

I checked my email and saw that one of my students was wondering the same thing.

She's hit a hard part in her work with her dreams, plus there are hard things happening in her personal life, plus the whole world is overwhelming so she was wondering if it was better to just take a "self care break" and come back to it when it's easier.

But no, it's not better to take a break. Working on your dream is THE BEST form of self care that we've got.

It's just that REAL self care is hard sometimes.

It asks you to face the hard things and make the hard choices.

Taking a break, having a me day - sometimes that's exactly what we need and sometimes (more times actually) what we're talking about there is numbing and distracting ourselves.

Which is fine it itself...

But when you dress it up as "self care" then it's problematic because you are legitimizing your excuses for not facing the hard thing.

You're actually just leaving yourself stuck in the hard place.

Here's the solution: you NEED practices that meet you where you are and help you move towards where you want to be.

NO ONE always feels brave and capable.

But there's lots you can do to connect with your inner wisdom, courage, creativity and power and then you WILL feel brave and capable... and filled up and happy and ready to explore your dreams.

I do this work every day in Dream Book.

Some days I meet myself crabby and feeling disheveled from a night of weird dreams.

Some days I meet myself feeling inspired and lit up.

It doesn't matter where you start - your Dream Book shows you how to get to where you want to be.

Dream Book: journaling practices for meeting yourself where you are and moving towards where you want to be

#BadVibesWelcome On Grief + Dreams + the healing power of being where you are

But before I start: whenever I write honestly about difficult things in my life, I gets ton of unsolicited advice, which, even when well meaning, is extremely unhelpful. So my policy now is to not accept ANY unsolicited advice.

I've been in a rough spot. And I’ve noticed myself pulling back a lot. 

Part of it is a very natural need to just be quiet and more inward focused right now.

But part of it is this “I shouldn’t share this it will bum people out” thing that is NOT helpful for anyone.

We need to create BRAVE spaces where all parts of us are welcome, loved and seen. This is what the Creative Dream Incubator has always been so of course there is space here for my grief now.

On top of some other shitty things that happened, a lifelong friend died.

I’ve know him since I was 5. We were great friends and he was my first boyfriend in high school, though as adults we drifted apart and back together and back apart a few times.

A few years ago he really pushed me away at a time when he was talking about making a lot of positive changes. And even though I am obviously a good person to have around when you want to make positive changes, I understood.

We can pick up a lot of baggage in these lifelong friendships. Sometimes we can see who we WERE more clearly than who we are, or who we are becoming. Sometimes we need space away from the past to create a better future.

So I respected his decision. And I expected it to be temporary.

And now of course I am wondering, if I had tried harder to help - would he still be here?

It’s a painful question to sit with, and I know I’m not the only one who has been here.

I honoured his decision out of respect, and love, and a hope for a better future for him. So of course I’m devastated that that didn’t happen.

And now I’m trying to just honour everything I am thinking and feeling even as a lot of it conflicts with each other.

I’m also noticing:

  • My cognitive capacity is way down, a lot of things I do that are usually quick and easy are quite slow and draining to do now.
  • I’m much quicker to lose my temper and snap at my husband.
  • I’m tired and just want to eat carbs which makes me more tired.

But even in this shitty place, my dreams still exist. That part of me is not gone because I am grieving.

I think we feel like we should put our joy aside to make space for grief. To be appropriate.

But I think the most appropriate thing is to try to be as human as possible. To embrace our wholeness.

To fully feel our grief and pain and fear and also feel whatever joy we can find.

I’ve felt creatively blocked all week. But since I’ve started writing this (I missed writing!) super awkwardly with my iPad Pro on my lap sitting on an uncomfortable bench outside a coffee shop with tears in my eyes, I feel.... better?

I don’t know if better is the right word. But feeling in touch with my creativity helps me be more in touch with ME. Like it opens up some space and everything stops feeling so constricted and dark.

Just like I teach in my classes, we can have fear and dreams, we can have self doubt and take brave steps. This works better when we honour all parts of our experience.

We can have joy and grief. Love and sadness.

The more fully we can allow and experience our actual feelings, the better off we are. Denying grief will eventually cut off joy. Denying joy will make it more difficult to fully grieve.

The more complicated our relationship was with the person we lost, the more difficult this is because it’s hard to hold conflicting feelings. We live in a culture that doesn’t have a lot of space for this, which makes it even harder to be in it.

I teach how to meet yourself where you are and use what you find there to move towards where you want to be.

We can’t only show up for this work when we feel “good” and “ready”. That defeats the whole purpose.

So this week I’ve been bringing my grief and conflicting feelings into Project Miracle even though a part of me has been saying OMG NO DON’T DO THIS!

This part of me feels that, as the teacher, I need to show up clear + focused + positive.

But that’s not true. As a teacher, I need to walk my talk.

And I would never want to exclude anyone from my programs because they are grieving or feeling lost or like everything they want is impossibly out of reach.

This is where #goodvibesonly is so toxic because it leaves us alone in our pain.

We can have bad vibes, be grieving and in pain and lost and feeling like there is no hope - we can be in that sucky space and still create space for healing and magic.

In fact, we need and deserve the healing and magic so much more in these times.

#badvibeswelcome

And I don't have the bandwidth to write more fully on this, but also think about who gets left behind in #goodvibesonly - it further marginalizes already marginalized people. It leaves the people who need help the most unable to receive it. And in the larger context of how systemic oppression works in our culture, it supports white supremacy, the patriarchy and colonialist capitalism. Let's do better than that.

You are *always* worthy of your dreams. But you won’t aways *feel* worthy.

Today I hit a milestone: All of my courses + libraries have been moved over to the new website.

This is HUNDREDS of pages of content, all re-designed, re-organized and better than ever. I’m not done, there are a least 1-2 weeks of work to get the site operational, but still, having all of the content moved is a big milestone.

I hit this milestone at 7:45 am this morning, sitting on the patio of a coffee shop I used to work out of all the time, pre-COVID. For computer tasks, I am more productive in a coffee shop and not having access to them since March has impacted my productivity, on top of how the stress of these times has already impacted it.

So it was a real gift this morning, to wake up super early and get to the coffee shop early enough to get a table on the patio, as our patios are open at 1/2 capacity with social distancing measures so getting a table is not something I can count on being able to do most of the time. Also – I usually don’t WANT to be there, but early in the morning is good.

I was up so early because I went to bed so early because I really hit a wall last night.

It felt equal parts emotional and physical. The physical part I understood but it felt like I was hitting new ground in the emotional part and I didn’t know what it was.

I did NOT have the capacity to be with it and figure out what it was. I took a hot bath and went to bed early, which is my go-to self care practice for when things are hard. It always feels more clear and hopeful in the morning.

So this morning I was happily working away at the cafe, and at one point I tried to access I page but I wasn’t logged in and this flashed on the screen:

And suddenly I knew what this new emotional wall I’m hitting is all about: I don’t feel worthy of this new website.

Like – who am I to plaster my smiling mug all over the login screen like that?

When I designed this page, I was DELIGHTED with it! I thought “it’s like I am right there smiling and welcoming them in!”

But now that “who do you think you are???!?!?” voice has taken over and trying to shame me into NOT showing up in this new way.

This is good.

Every time I level up in some way (and I must say that levelling up is NOT all about things you can measure – like an increase in income or audience – there are infinite ways to level up and our dreams will need us to level up in all sorts of un-measurable ways along the way) I come across my inner resistance to showing up BIGGER and BRIGHTER and TRUER.

This resistance is made up of parts of me who need healing before they can feel safe with me taking my next steps in living my most brave, free and authentic life. 

We ALL have these parts. We live in a culture that is constantly telling us who we should be and what we should want so living by your internal compass feels TERRIFYING for some parts of us. 

This is just a part of the work.

It’s never a sign that we really CAN’T do this, or that we am NOT good enough or NOT worthy of having what we want.

It’s just a thing we have to work on, a part of the process. Just as important as making the website or recording the podcast or writing the book or making the art.

This is why Dream Work and Inner Work need to be a part of your daily practices! Otherwise you don’t notice this stuff because it’s all happening way beneath the surface – and the stuff you don’t notice about yourself has a LOT of control over you.

Your Next Steps: A journaling + meditation class to help you be more CLEAR and SURE of your next steps