I set out to participate in?Susannah Conway?s August Break and post a photo every day for the month of August.

Last Friday I posted about Creative Burnout and I haven’t posted anything since.

Ha.

Funny how that works.

I am putting together The Best Thing I Have Ever Done.

I am so proud of this and so happy that I have created it.

I’m also so terrified about it.

And everything in between.

That’s all I can really say about it for now.

It’s amazing how much energy it takes to bring something shiny and new into the world.

Right now I’m either working-on-this-thing or actively-filling-the-well, there isn’t space for much of anything else.

This morning I had a beautiful picnic breakfast in the park.

Mostly because I am too TOAST to do anything else.

And being in nature recharges me (as do lattes with honey).

I have a lot on my plate right now. A lot a lot.

So yesterday I overdid it.

And today I am TOAST.

I want to say this mostly as a reminder to me:

(Even though I already know this.? But, we all forget sometimes.)

It’s much better to slow down, and do the refilling-of-the-creative-well-things every day when you’re not TOAST then it is to push yourself to work as hard/fast as you can and then become TOAST.

Keeping something from toasting is easier than un-toasting TOAST!

I don’t like that I have a capacity.

But I’ve got it.

And learning how to care for it is so important.

Learning how to care for it opens up possibilities to play with it and stretch it and find out how miraculously flexible it can be in certain situations.

Ignoring it and bulldozing through leaves me TOASTED with no options but to go into Extreme Recovery Mode, which is where I’m going to spend the rest of the day.

PS: For the longest time, I didn’t even know I had a creative capacity!? This is because my creative capacity is actually quite large, and I was always working well enough within it that I never experienced it.

I first started experiencing it when I decided to give myself 6 months to quit my part-time job and do my creativespiritual work full time.

Luckily, I was in Jamie Ridler‘s Circe’s Circle at the time, a Creative Dream Coaching Circle.

Jamie’s support, guidance and expertise were instrumental in helping me learn more about my creative capacity and what to do about it.? And now, thankfully, the days when I become TOAST are few and far between.

PPS: Jamie’s Circe’s Circle Creative Dream Coaching Circle is starting again soon.? I highly recommend it! You can check it out right here.

PPPS:? And now I am off to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer and eat popcorn and take a bubble bath and a nap and let my brain recharge.

I’m changing it up a little this morning with a London Fog latte instead of a regular latte.

But other than that, this is what I do every Monday morning in the coffee shop beside the park.

This week’s planning session is all about Moving Bravely Forward.

Last week I finalized my plans for how I want to shift and change my business to accommodate my new mission: growing truer, deeper + sparklier (not bigger!).

So this week’s Creative Genius Planning Session is all about making a plan to put my new plans into action.

It feels very good to see, clearly, what that looks like and what needs to happen, and when!

Excited!

I recorded THREE videos today!? One for Advanced Creative Badassery group, one for my Creative With Money course, one for this week’s Creative Dream Q+A (that one will be posted on my blog on Wednesday).

I heart costumes and the way they help me play with different energies and put on my “OH YES I AM CLEAR, FOCUSED AND READY TO WORK” mood.

I made purple slipcovers for my pink chairs.

I remember buying these chairs, only 8 years ago.? I spent months searching for the exact-right-chairs in the exact-right-shade-of-pink.

Did you know I have 1/2 a degree in interior design, and an actual degree in fashion design?

I have learned a lot about colour, and design.

I dropped out of interior design school because I already had clients and every one of them wanted me to do the same thing for them: make their homes beautiful just like the interior design magazines.

Bleh.

I wanted to help people tap in to their creative magic, to help them create spaces that would make their souls sing.

Spaces that would nurture and incubate their dreams.

I made a whole program about it.?? I worked on it for months and months and months.

And all my clients wanted was pretty houses, just like in the magazines.? Which is kind of how I would describe hell.

That’s when I went back to school to become a spiritual teacher/counselor/mentor-in-bringing-your-dreams-to-life.

So, I had these perfect-shade-of-pink chairs.

Perfect for me-from-then.

And me-from-now was becoming increasingly uncomfortable with them.? Me-from-now definitely wants deep, luscious purple.

So I made slipcovers.

And they are perfect.

Except for the hard part.

Saying goodbye to the me who loved those pink chairs!

Saying goodbye to her dreams.? Remembering the hopes she had for the life she was creating when she bought those chairs, how optimistic she was about it all and how it all fell apart and how that still hurts.

With each step forward you have to let go of another thing from the past.

The importance of giving yourself time and space to grieve.

If you don’t grieve that stuff it stops you from taking steps forward.? It stops your dreams from growing.

Finally covering the pink chairs showed me how much grieving I still have to do.

We all, pretty much always, have more grieving to do.

Consciously giving yourself time and space to grieve is, surprisingly, an important step in moving your dreams forward.? Sad, but true.

I want to write an update and tell you everything that is happening with my Summer of Dreams project but I can’t.

Last night I was reading Deepak Chopra (OMG! Reading up in my loft! With the pink sparkly walls and the twinkle lights twinkling! And the cool summer breeze! Perfection!) and he talked about how our bodies need to metabolize learnings before they can become really true for us, before they can change us and our lives.

That’s what I’m doing – metabolizing.

I’m not at the part where I can explain it all clearly, I’m still marinating in it.

I’m still having the most beautiful summer, ever.? I’m still taking my dreams and my creative journals to the beach and the park.

And I’m getting a really surprising amount of work done.

This is the Creative Dream Office I set up this morning:

I’m savouring the lushness of summer and letting the summer-ness of it nourish me and my dreams.

And I’m still working through both Creative Journal Magic and the Creative Dream Incubator.? Slowly but surely.

I feel like my creative dreams have been blown open by love and possibility.

And that’s all I can really say about it right now.