I wrote that post I shared on Monday, about metabolizing joy, at the conservatory. I was really FEELING IT.

And I decided to post it here but also on my social media. Like as a way of being more grounded in this - claiming this as the story I am living now.

And I knew doing that would stir up other feelings!

And that feeling those feelings was part of the process.

Because we are never 100% ONE THING.

I am moving on, doing deep healing, making space for joy. The majority of me is here.

But I am also stuck, sad, shocked and angry. It’s just that I gave those feelings SO MUCH SPACE over the last few months that they don’t take up as much space now.

Last night I wanted a snack and was thinking of what to make. And then I asked myself “Do you really want a snack? Because I feel like maybe I’m actually still full from dinner?”

I sat with that, focused on my body, and sure enough - I wasn’t actually hungry. I wanted to eat to avoid feelings. 

So I put on my galaxy lamp (it projects stars and moving nebulas on the walls and ceiling) and got out my yoga mat and stretched. After a few nice stretches, I was lying on the yoga mat crying.

This is healing.

If you are back and forth like that it can feel so disheartening, but please remember: this is healing. Making  space for all of it.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Upcoming calls: Centered Grounded Present. Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024

I mentioned over a week ago that I started the Dream Self Challenge. (If you're brand new you won't have access to this yet, you get new pages each month. But you do have the Dream Self Page)

I was so happy to see people sharing in the forum that they are doing it too!

And I haven't mentioned it here since, but I didn't plan to do the 5 days within 5 days, you know?

So I did it again today and again it was soooo soothing.

I noticed that my Dream Self is more grounded in her routines and structures/systems.

Can I say how TIRED I am of getting this same message?????

I mean this is what this work is like a lot of the time. The message comes over and over.

Sometimes because we're resistant to it so we don't really listen. Sometimes because it just takes time to fully act on it.

I mean - we can only take one step at a time!

And I have taken so many steps with this and there are still more steps ahead of me.

It's boring and annoying AND it's the only way to get to where I want to be.

So I'm listening and taking my next little steps.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Upcoming calls: Centered Grounded Present. Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024

I had therapy last week and my therapist talked about how she sees that I have actually METABOLIZED all of my difficult my feelings about everything that’s happened in my life these last few months. And how, when you do that, you end up free. Happy. This is healing. 

My therapist said something like: "Your practices work. You had the rug pulled out from under you and you did not fall apart. You're doing great."

The next day I decided to go to the conservatory and butterfly garden and when I stepped in there I realised - now I’m am metabolizing my joy. Getting grounded in it. Breathing in joy. Appreciating the miracle that is my life. Optimistic for the future. 

There is a part of me, which keeps getting smaller, who is waiting for this to be harder. This part of me is stunned at how I’ve moved on from my (only?) (first?) marriage. 

This is an old story about fear and how hanging onto things is the only way to value or honour them. 

That part of me is a little freaked out to see the rest of me living in a brand new story about how life is a gift and I don’t want to spend it being unhappy and holding onto things that don’t fit anymore. And how it doesn’t take away from how much I loved my life with my husband, to say that it’s in the past now. 

The truth is, most of the time I feel deeply happy right now. There is so much space in my life for my healing practices and Dream Work, and I have been creating all new routines and habits for creative magic, self care and joy.

This is creative dreaming. Being deeply present with your life, not avoiding the hard parts but also not getting stuck in them. Using what you have to create what you want.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Recent call: Centered Grounded Present. Upcoming calls: Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024

This question came up on our November new moon intention-setting and coaching call. (If you haven't watch it, get the replay here)

On one hand, this is a really BIG question. 

But on the other hands there is actually a really simple answer:

Don’t ever give up while you’re feeling defeated (or scared, frustrated, in a state of panic, etc).

The whole point of Creative Dreaming is to act from your inner truth. Your intuition, creativity, your true self, your connection to spirit. To not be reacting to the world or following the path the world tells you to follow, to act from a deeper place within yourself.

So you know it’s time to give up, or make a big change, if that’s what feels right inside you. It may feel sad, but it feels right.

And sometimes “giving up” doesn’t end up being about actually giving up the dream forever. 

It ends up being more about taking a break or giving up the way you were pursuing something and finding a way that works better for you.

There can (and probably will!) be times when you are doing you best but things just don’t work out. The obstacles start to pile up and it gets really, really scary.

There can be times when the things we need are always just out of reach.

We’re all going to feel defeated sometimes. We’re all going to panic about how slowly things are coming together. 

There are big, uncomfortable feelings involved with creative dreaming. 

And most of the work of creative dreaming is processing those feelings, alchemising them into fuel for for the path.

But what if that work just feels like too much?

If giving up feels like a relief, give up. 

Give up on that particular approach to that particular dream. 

Give yourself some space to rest and replenish and process your feelings and I believe your dream will come back to you when the time is right.

Sometimes giving up on a dream makes space for a new version of that dream to find you. Sometimes that new version is BETTER than the original dream.

This is all growth work.

Growth means change.

Our dreams shouldn’t stay static.

And there isn’t a way to do any of this wrong.

Just keep showing up. It's really about showing up FOR YOURSELF, not for any particular outcome.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Upcoming calls: Centered Grounded Present. Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024

This is the journal page I made for Centered Grounded Present (which is today!)

I wanted to share it as another reminder that your drawings can look like a three year old did them! It doesn't matter what they look like, expressing how a thing feels in your journal is really really helpful.

The energy you're in when you are making a thing look how you want it to look is TOTALLY DIFFERENT from the energy of processing your feelings.

Your journal should be a safe space for processing your feelings.

There is nothing wrong with making art that looks how you want it to look and putting effort into that, but that's NOT the same as expressing and processing your feelings.

The CENTERED circle within a circle, and then the GROUNDED roots pulling down into the earth and then the PRESENT radiating out around it... this is how it feels for me today.

I felt the PRESENT as rays of light, but when I drew it, it looked like a flower and that felt right too.

I've been taking notes on what happens, how I feel, when I bring in these qualities. And I'll keep doing that on the call today.

It feels magical.

Like these qualities, together, pull me deeper into my body and into my magic. I feel powerful. And capable. And inspired. And all the good things.

I can't wait to practice in community, and then keep practicing this!

If you're in Dream Book: Get the call details here. (Replay will be here a few hours after we're done - leave your thoughts in the comments while you watch!)

If you're not in Dream Book: Find our more + sign up to join us here.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Upcoming calls: Centered Grounded Present. Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024

Last week I got my first smart plug. I plugged a lamp into it.

Since the sun sets so early and rises so late now, I am often at the front door in the dark.

And there IS a light by the front door, but when I got married my husband built a big closet along that wall, which I am happy to have, but which put the light into the closet and so the entrance area is dark. And when I turn on a light, I have to go back and turn it off and I am trying to not walk around everywhere in my winter boots (there’s a lot of sand and salt on them). So it’s just awkward. 

I got this smart light, thinking how great it would be to be able to turn the lamp on and off with my voice.

But when I set it up, this option popped up on my phone, to AUTOMAGICALLY turn on the light when I come home and turn it off when I leave.

Like, whoa.

I didn’t know it could be this easy.

I want more of this in more parts of my life. Not smart gadgets, but having things turn out easier than I think they will be. And feeling delighted and supported by that.

To that end - Centered Grounded Present is happening tomorrow.

Because everything DOES go better when you are centered, grounded and present.

AND because GETTING centered, grounded and present is so HARD right now.

Of course the harder things get, the more important it is that we do this work. But also the harder things get, the harder it is to do this work.

Both are true.

So we're going to recognize and be with all of the ways that this work is hard.

We're going to tap into the magic of not being alone in this work.

And we're going to PRACTICE, not perfect.

If you're in Dream Book: Get the call details here. (Replay will be here a few hours after we're done tomorrow - leave your thoughts in the comments while you watch!)

If you're not in Dream Book: Find our more + sign up to join us here.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Upcoming calls: Centered Grounded Present. Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024

(Photo of me doing my planning for next week on Friday FOR THE THIRD WEEK IN A ROW??!!)

✨Weekly planning is a miracle✨

Dream Book Resource: Creative Genius Planning Sessions

During the pandemic I stopped doing weekly planning with any kind of consistency because it was week after week of NOT doing the things I wanted to do so why keep trying?

And while I feel like a broken record about this, it’s still on my mind so I’ll keep talking about it - I haven’t been able to get back on track since. Maybe I have long Covid, maybe it’s all peri-menopause, but I definitely don’t have the mental clarity, focus and drive I used to have. 

But I still have creative dreams.

And creative dreams do us to take action and taking action is just really messy without a plan. 

We’ve done some amazing, healing Zooms on structure and routines in Dream Book recently and it’s really helped me sort through this to find a way to do this that feels supportive and hopeful. 

(Dream Book members: If you missed them, the replays are: Structure Habits Routines Call | Marketing as a Creative + Spiritual Practice Calls: Calls 12 + 13 about habits, systems + structure)

I started with 1 rule: plan next week at the end of this week. 

This is not a rule I suggest for anyone else, I just noticed that by the end of the week I felt some momentum starting. And on Mondays I tend to feel pretty unsure of where to start my week. So I decided to use the momentum I had at the end of the week to plan the following week. 

It’s working really well. 

Which does not mean I am DOING ALL THE THINGS every week. Some things get moved into next week’s plan. That’s fine. 

Sometimes we just can’t do everything we want and sometimes we are planning unrealistically and we become more realistic and effective at planning by… DOING IT CONSISTENTLY. 

And the only way to be consistent at anything is to do it a small and easy enough way that you can actually DO IT.

Once you are doing it you can gradually ramp up if that’s appropriate. But often, we can make more progress than we think I’m with really tiny steps. 

And it’s not about forcing yourself to do the things you think you’re supposed to.  

I am astounded by how HEALING it is to follow through on my own ideas. To write the idea down and say: I will give this some time and energy this week. And then to do it. 

It makes me feel so optimistic for my future. 

If you’re not doing it, what’s the smallest way you could some weekly planning FOR YOUR DREAMS, not for the things you “need to do”?

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Upcoming calls: Centered Grounded Present. Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024

Yesterday is a good example of a day where I was stuck and didn't want to "un-stick". You know? As I always say, you do the work that's in front of you and if you "just can't" with dream work then that means you need inner work.

And I chose not to. I did some journaling which was good AND ALSO I just kind of sucky and stuck most of the day.

AND I decided to make sure today was not a sucky day by promising myself if I still felt I couldn't do anything with Dream Book, then I had to do the Un-Sticking Station.

Today I started the Dream Self Challenge. (If you're brand new you won't have access to this yet, you get new pages each month. But you do have the Dream Self Page)

This was soooo goooood.

Honestly, just the start of any of the Creative Dream Alchemy meditations is such an ideal way for me to start a day. A reminder that my feelings are ok, I don't have to change them in order to show up for my dreams and then connecting with the Field of Creative Dream Alchemy always shifts my mood if I start in a bad one.

My Dream Self was soooo helpful. Connecting with her felt like such a gift.

Then she gave me a crystal ball that felt healing and activating.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay. Upcoming calls: Centered Grounded Present. Goodbye 2023 Hello 2024