Goodbye 2022 releasing ceremony is happening today!. The replay will be available a few hours after we're done. The call will be MAGIC. The replay will be MAGIC. This is open to all members of Dream Book.

Today my practice is: sitting with all of the feelings I am having about the state of the world and "how dare I wholeheartedly pursue my dreams while people around me are suffering?"

I have been writing and deleting and re-writing.

I was doing this yesterday, too. Yesterday's post was about my 67th try.

The reason it's feeling so urgent for me to recognize that ALL LIFE IS SACRED is because of what's happening in my city. A serial killer of Indigenous women was recently caught. A person was murdered in the library by 3 teens this weekend. And it feels like every day there is a new tragedy and my city is spiralling out of control.

I guess I just want to say: there is a lot I am not saying. There is a lot that I don't feel ready to share.

I am sitting with my feelings - using the Yikes! I Am Having A Lot Of Feelings and also the Un-Sticking Station practices and practicing my way into my truth.

This is the world I live in and dream in.

I did spend a lot of years in the new age/new thought worlds where it was encouraged to just be positive and not watch the news. I understand now how much that attitude relies on unconscious use of privilege, and that's not who I want to be now.

AND I can't let it consume me either.

Processing my feelings, even when it's layers and layers and layer and all very messy, is the way to find clarity and truth, it's the way to know what I want to DO.

So I've been doing a ton of that work, and all of it feels too raw to share.

I will just say, to anyone else feeling this way: please remember that it's not on YOU to save the world. That individualistic perspective is one of the things that is toxic about our culture. For every problem we face, there are already smart and capable people who have solutions, there are grassroots movements who are already doing the work - we don't need to figure out how to solve anything. We need to support the people who are already doing the work.

HOLY GUACAMOLE there is so much to let go of right now.

This was my first thought as I went over the class content for the Goodbye 2022 Releasing Ceremony (which is happening on Dec 15 inside Dream Book).

Like - every year it feels like there's a lot - but this year? This year actually feels like the year we can start REALLY letting go of the things from the pandemic and all of the ways that's changed things.

I mean we're still IN IT and I am still recovering from Covid as I write this, and also we're moving through some parts of it.

But I don't think it's hyperbole to say - we need to change the world. NOW.

And it's not on ME or YOU to do this. That individualist way of looking at the world is one of the things that we need to change.

But we need to let go of so many layers of things we've picked up living in this toxic culture.

I've started seeing my parents completely differently.

Like - I love my parents. They are wonderful people who always did their best.

AND

There are so many things I needed that I did not get as a child.

That's not their fault. They didn't get those things either. And there are so many things that my parents didn't get that they DID make sure that I got. Just like I see my husband make sacrifices so he can do the same with his kids.

But it's bigger than any one family.

OUR CULTURE is failing us.

OUR CULTURE does not recognize all life as sacred.

We grew up in this.

We take things on.

A belief that we are not enough. That our gifts don't matter. That our joy doesn't matter.

We somehow end up believe that we are something other than a goddamn miracle.

But you ARE.

You ARE a goddamn miracle.

And it's time to let go of everything that tells you otherwise. Because it's all bullshit.

And I think we need to free ourselves of our culture internally before we can change the culture externally. And it's very urgent that we do that, before we destroy the whole planet.

Goodbye 2022 releasing ceremony is happening Dec 15 at 1:00 Central (North America). The replay will be available a few hours after we're done. The call will be MAGIC. The replay will be MAGIC. This is available to all members of Dream Book - join us here.

(Journaling tools from the Project Miracle class)

DO the thing that feels like magic

I feel SO LUCKY that I have a life where I even CAN do this.

And I also still feel SO CONFLICTED about actually doing this.

But, yesterday, which technically was Friday, I did do the thing that felt like magic: sewing. I finished sewing a bright fuschia heavyweight wool jersey fitted, long sleeved top. Perfect for wearing under dresses on the really cold days. Way too hot to wear most days, but it's so nice to have something so special to wear on those super cold days, and it will likely last the rest of my life.

What a gift for my future self.

And then I was inspired and kept going. I did a ton of embroidery this weekend on a project that FILLS me with delight every time I look at it.

I see what my dream was trying to show me - that this helps change HOW I am, which changes HOW I do things, which puts me on a different trajectory.

So, today, the thing that felt like magic, interestingly enough, was Pinterest marketing!

I just felt inspired and everything flowed and I made 24 new pins and have them in my scheduler (I use Tailwind, which I have not been consistent with over the last few years, but Pinterest is a really good marketing tool for me).

I got that done by 8 am and then asked:

What next? What feels like magic?

Working with my Dream Self (from Dream Book). Getting her help for coming up with a plan for this week that makes space for magic AND is strategic about what needs to get done.

Well. Connecting with my Dream Self brought me more than I was expecting.

She was not all that interested in just looking at this week's plan. She was EMBODYING my biggest goals for my work.

And she was pointing to this project that I've had on hold for some time.

I reminded her that I put it on hold because of the "Slow the fuck down! BE as creative, powerful and magnetic as you ARE" message that my dream sent me in the summer and how I really have been slowing down and connecting to that deeper and more creative, powerful and magnetic part of me.

Yeah, she says, I know. It's time for your next steps with that. Now it's time to BE all of that WHILE picking this project back up.

At first I was confused, because that project had some deadlines for December and January that I absolutely cannot meet. And extra double cannot meet if I am staying "slowed the fuck down".

Then I saw it. A new way of approaching the work. No deadlines. All magic.

Yes, she says. You see it now. Pick the project back up AS your most creative, powerful and magnetic self. Pick it up slowly and joyfully. Don't WORK on it, CREATE and EXPLORE and PLAY with it.

OK yeah.

Then I look at my plans for this week and it feels more clear: Get my tasks organized to make space for this other thing. I don't necessarily need to spend any time with it this week, I can look at how to integrate it back in, in the new year.

Dream Book members: click here to read this on our private blog with comments section, where I link to all of the practices I use.

Not in Dream Book yet? Click here to find out more + join us.

I Make My Own Magic: available in hardcover + coil bound journals, mugs, zipper pouches, stickers, magnets, art prints and more in the Creative Dream Incubator RedBubble shop.

My work this week: do the next thing that feels like magic.

This is from my Dream Status Report from Friday, and the meeting with my dream and the soul of my business that I had there.

I feel like yes - there is this rope that goes from where I am to where I want to be. My dream IS this rope. The soul of my business is holding the other end, making sure it stays sturdy.

I can trust this rope.

Also - the dream IS THE ROPE. Like, being in the process, listening to my heart and intuition, staying connected and doing the little things I can do each day - THIS is the dream. Not the destination, which is my business goals, which is connected, but the dream itself is to enjoy this creative process.

Do the next thing that feels like magic. But I am conflicted about actually DOING this.

This is a challenge to some parts of me! Like - shouldn't I do the thing that makes sense?

Right now, what feels like magic is sewing.

But, since I am feeling better, shouldn't I get to work? There are so many things I wanted to do last week that I didn't do.

So I invite in my dream and the soul of my business (using the processes from the Dream Lab + Creative Business Incubator classes).

Girl?! What are you doing! We gave you clear instructions.

I know you did, but...

NO! BUTS!

I am really conflicted though. I need your help here. I was sick and all these things didn't get done last week, I want to do the things.

Yes. You WILL do those things. But does doing those things RIGHT NOW feel like magic?

No.

The dream is not about getting to the finish line as fast as possible. There are ways of thinking/feeling/seeing/BEING that are so much more important than the speed of how things happen. To be in alignment with us, you need to do the next thing that feels like magic. Your work right now is learning to prioritize this. I know you know you can trust your dream but - act like it.

Oh wow. ALL of my conditioning from living in this world is telling me to catch up on work. But if I am going to TRUST MY DREAM and TRUST MY MAGIC actually I need to sew.

Yes. It's that simple.

It doesn't feel simple at all but I get that it IS simple.

You ARE going to do those other things but actually - even though you ARE recovered enough to do the work, technically, you are not received enough to have the energy you need to do it in the most aligned/inspired way. You know what I mean by that. You need to work from that deeper connection to your dream and your Dream Self. You don't have the energy to do THAT today.

Yeah. I get it. Thank you for explaining it more clearly. I know you are right AND I have so much conditioning around getting caught up.

Sewing IS the next magical thing. I am going to do that this morning.

 

Dream Book members: click here to read this on our private blog with comments section, where I link to all of the practices I use.

Not in Dream Book yet? Click here to find out more + join us.

My Dream Status Report:

PART ONE: (sometimes these can stay the same for months at time, sometimes they change often)

My dream is: BEING the artist + writer I want to be. This is the "big picture" dream - this includes lots of different inner + outer things, which I am working on clarifying in my new Dream Book.

I want it because: This feels so enticing and important.

When I have it I will feel: More in the flow, more creative and like... feeling fully expressed. Right now it's like I have sooo much TO express, I would like to feel more fully EXPRESSED.

My new moon intention for this month: VERY SPECIFIC business goal for the end of the year

 

PART TWO: Invite your dream in (using the Dream Lab practice from Dream Book) to help you with the rest of the prompts.

My dream shows up as... a rope in my hands. I can ease my way along the rope, one step at a time, and it does lead to my dream. But it's snowy, so the rope is buried, so I can only see the little bit that is right in front of me. The rope asks that I trust it.

So I ask "How do I know I have the rope in my hands?" and it said "By how it feels in your heart"

Just do the next thing that feels like magic.

Specifically it feels like this: I posted the New Year Journal Prompts on my Instagram yesterday. This morning I saw that that post got me some new followers - which is really rare for me. My photos don't get a lot of visibility on Instagram and I have accepted that. But when I saw that THIS photo was visible enough to bring new people in, I wondered - should I do more like this?

That is what NOT to do.

Posting the photo, sharing the prompts - that felt like magic. Trying to reverse engineer this to create more scenarios where the IG algorithm works in my favour in the teeniest way IS NOT MAGIC.

Not that those kinds of logistical, strategic things aren't ever good to do!

Just - that's not what the rope is telling me to do right now.

And I want to listen to the rope. And I want to trust my magic.

(Again, this is NOT general advice to ignore logistics - just where I am right now. Logistics have helped me a lot with my dreams, too!)

My dream is the rope. And my dream feels very connected to my New Moon Intention as well. Interesting, since a few weeks ago they felt at odds with each other. Now they feel connected, though it feels like the New Moon Intention will take longer that just until the New Moon, which feels fine.

I call in the Soul of my Business (another practice from Dream Book) to join us.

It snows up as a big being of energy and light... and it's holding the other end of the rope.

It feels really good and SOLID to see that other end, even though I still don't see what's between me and that end, as everything is buried under snow, it feels easier to trust the rope now.

 

PART THREE:

Last week’s focus was: Nurture my creative flow.

What happened in the last week? Covid 🙁 Really just tons of resting. Doing what I can to keep up, but mostly not keeping up.

What am I learning/How do I feel about this? Maybe this was the ideal way to spend this week, resting and not doing... also having Covid now means I'm not that likely to get it over the holidays so I can start the new year feeling good. This year everything feels busier, though I did my Holiday Season Boundaries I need to look at all of that again, because I feel like things are getting too busy, even with only doing the things I want to do. Where can I simplify more?

What do I need now? Last winter I LOVED winter, how it felt like I had so much SPACE for myself. Quiet. Reflective. Right now I need that feeling back, I feel like the holiday season is starting to crash in on me. And that's not actually true - it's just that I need to get things organized. I want to see how it will all work, between our 3 holiday dinners (hosting 1, and bringing food to the other 2, and we're each cooking different things in a tiny kitchen so planning ahead is necessary). Yeah. WHAT I NEED is to plan it all out, and see on paper how there is time for everything.

What does my dream need now? The rope just shakes a little. Keep doing the next thing that feels like magic. In all honestly, right in this moment that is a nap. This reflecting and planning has tired me out. But yes - I want this to be my guiding light as I get back into the swing of things next week.

Taking all of this into account, my focus for the next week is: Do the next thing that feels like magic.

(Photo of my journaling kit: zipper pouch + hardcover journal from the Creative Dream Incubator RedBubble shop)

We've been through so much these past few years and now the world is falling apart around us.

This is my mood and manifesto for the 2022 holiday season: do not let one single thing bring you down.

Hold boundaries. Say no. If it causes stress say "FUCK NO" and move on.

Your dreams are precious.

Your mental health is precious.

Your creativity is precious.

Your self care is precious.

What is your mood and manifesto for the 2023 holiday season?

Now that I am starting to feel better from Covid, and I am looking at my lists of things I wanted to do this month with my work and creative projects and in my social life... holy fuck it does feel like the holiday season is just CRASHING in on me.

So I am making lists and getting organized and also looking at: What are the boundaries I need to have in place, in order to have the December that I want?

(This is SUCH a valuable question to spend time with at this time of year)

My boundaries:

Between the pandemic, the general state of the world and my own experience with peri-menopause - I have anxiety now that I've never had before. I need to be more mindful of not over-extending myself and getting depleted + overwhelmed, because it happens so much more easily now.

I'm not going into a single store the whole month of December. Groceries will be click + collect. And my husband, who is as extraverted as I am introverted, and actually LIKES to go wander around in stores, can go get stuff if we need it beyond that.

I will not go to anything I don't want to go to, and the things I do go to - I will have a plan in place to go home early. (A plan that allows my party-loving husband to stay out late if he wants because he gets to have the holiday season he wants, too). Early bed times are rejuvenating to me and late bed times can actually ruin the whole next day for me. This plan needs to be in place ahead of time, otherwise it can feel too complicated to figure it out and I end up staying out later than is good for me.

"I will not go to anything I don't want to go to" means literally. I will risk disappointing people. AND I will plan ahead to manage my energy... like if I know I want to have dinner with my family for Christmas, then do I need to keep my schedule more free for a few days before, so I know I'll be well rested/regulated and have the energy?

I will stay hydrated and well nourished. I can eat anything I want at holiday parties. AND I will eat lots of veggies, whole foods and protein. I have a lot of fruits + veggies in the freezer to make quick smoothies, and protein powder.

Daily walks outside. No matter how cold it is - I have all the gear I need to do this safely + warmly.

Daily meditation. No exceptions.

Notice how I am feeling during screen time and stop when needed! This is one of the things that can deplete me very quickly.

Have a soothing creative project: I am starting an embroidery project that I am really excited about. I've done a whole bunch of test pieces and am ready to start - I am embroidering rainbow prisms, with an eyeball in front of them, all over my favourite linen dress.

Have some fun novels to read: I have 4 books waiting for me at the library right now that should be enough.

For if I do get depleted: Take Ashwaghanda right away (an adaptogen that is amazing for anxiety). Take CBD gummies when I'm ready for bed. (I am stocked up on both) Hot aromatherapy bath.

Which brings up a question: Where can I lower expectations in order to preserve my energy?

EG: house cleaning standards, getting more prepared foods and cooking less from scratch, putting things off until the new year.

Will keep thinking on that one.

Joseph and I have Covid. I got the bivalent vaccine and he didn't, and he is much sicker than I am. But still, I am really worn out.

I do want to keep up with the daily posts just because I want to! But, of course, I may need to take a break. Luckily, when I am really "on" I tend to write a lot, so I have some posts ready to go for the next few days and then I'll see where I'm at. So I'm sharing this one about Alchemy Wheels which I wrote sometime last week and I DID start to work on them after writing this 🙂

And - the Marketing As A Creative + Spiritual Practice Call (inside Dream Book) is ON! I am really excited about our call today.

Last week my explorations led me to see: I need new Alchemy Wheels.

Alchemy Wheels are one of the practices I lean on the most for making changes that feel outside of my comfort zone. Many times I've felt super stuck and then realized Oh! I need new Alchemy Wheels! and it always feels magic, like out of no way a way was made.

AND

It's one of the practices I RESIST the most. Precisely because of how clarifying and helpful it is.

You know we all teach the things I need the most. I created the Creative Dream Incubator because my dreams have always felt SO important me, like they've taken up a lot of space even long before I had any clue what to do with them AND my resistance and ambivalence has ALSO always taken up a lot of space.

I learned all of this because I had to. And I continue to need it. Again - it's like yoga. You don't stretch your back out once and then you're good for the rest of your life. AND the longer you practice, the more strong and flexible you get. The more you practice, the more you love AND NEED the practice.

So, that's why I am writing about the Alchemy Wheels today because I AM NOT DOING THEM. Is the embarrassment of saying I'd do a thing and then not doing it enough to get me to do it?

First I want to point out, the people who have been reading my daily posts since fall know this - I decided to start a new Dream Book this fall for my new dreams.

So far I have 2.5 pages.

Which means: I've been working on this for been several months and I have not completed the first WEEK of content from the Dream Book program.

Which is absolutely A SUCCESS.

I'm giving myself the time and space I need. This is perfect.

I have been doing the Dream Lab practice and other practices - it's not like I am not showing up for my dreams.

But the Dream Book itself is about creating a structure that brings CLARITY and MOMENTUM to your process.

And to truly do this you actually do need to let it take the time it takes.

So my resistance to doing these Alchemy Wheels (which are a thing you do at the end of the first month of content in the Dream Book program) IS partly my self doubt and fear and all that stuff that gets riled up with this work.

But it's MOSTLY about me doing this on MY timeline.

I've been unplugging from all of the ways our culture tells us to move fast and stay busy. So moving fast with my dreams doesn't feel right.

Finding my actual pace is a process.

This IS the work. Even though it looks like nothing is happening.

This IS THE WORK. Repeating that for the voices in me that are still feeling like I am moving too slow even though everything I just wrote feels so TRUE.

And yes, I am going to go START my Alchemy Wheels now. I am not going to use the cutouts (which you can print out and glue into your journal so you have the wheels there, with some ideas already on the, and keep filling them in) I want to do this old school. Drawing in my journal. Adding colour. Giving myself space to BE WITH this process of clarifying and defining my next moves.

Every Friday I do a Dream Status Report. These help me reflect on the past week so I can LEARN from my process, and apply what I learn to the next week. Setting intentions for the week is fun, but reflecting on how you held that intention at the end of the week is a much more powerful practice.

 

PART ONE: (sometimes these can stay the same for months at time, sometimes they change often)

My dream is: BEING the artist + writer I want to be. This is the "big picture" dream - this includes lots of different inner + outer things, which I am working on clarifying in my new Dream Book.

I want it because: Staying where I am feels like staying stuck + this feels so enticing and important.

When I have it I will feel: More in the flow, more creative and like... feeling fully expressed. Right now it's like I have sooo much TO express, I would like to feel more fully EXPRESSED.

My new moon intention for this month: VERY SPECIFIC business goal for the end of the year

 

PART TWO: Invite your dream in (using the Dream Lab practice) to help you with the rest of the prompts.

My dream shows up as... it's an embroidery pattern I was working on yesterday. An eyeball with a triangle behind it, and the triangle is a rainbow. (I knew I wanted to embroidery eye symbols on a dress and yesterday I started drawing and embroidering some practice eyes, and then I added the rainbow triangle and I am really liking it)

So, my dream showed up as the embroidery like it's alive. And it's soooo sweet. Like it feels like my creativity brought to life and I want to cry with happiness seeing it.

Since I am also working on holding onto my new moon intention more firmly this month, and since last week it butted in on this meeting with my dream (that's there the "business bitch" came from) this week I thought I would invite it in.

My new moon intention shows up as embroidery scarabs. I just looked it up - I am using the book Mystical Stitches for my embroidery (soooo good!) and I knew I had seen scarabs in there and sure enough, she says they are "a great symbol for birthing new projects you have been working diligently on"

The scarabs, which immediately felt, to me, like a symbol of abundance, are crawling around on the floor pretty fast. They seem energized by the eye/rainbow triangle.

This is a WHOLE different relationship between the part of me who wants to be creative/happy/free/expressed and the part of me who does have specific business goals.

I am thinking back to last week's meeting between the Dream Fairy and the Business Bitch and I don't feel any of that here. There is no pushing against or arguing, this feels like a peaceful relationship where everyone can co-exist and even support each other.

NOT that it feels like this inner conflict has been FOREVER RESOLVED for me, but today it feels good.

Something worked it's way out by me giving this space last week, even if I don't understand in a logical way what happened.

I sit with this meditation a little longer and it's like - the rainbow beaming from the eyeball is like the sun shining down on the scarabs. Energizing them.

I mean that's so obvious, right?

Me being the artist + writer I want to be, me feeling expressed and in the flow - of course this is the "light" that lights up the marketing work. And I just cringed a little writing "marketing work" because that's not how it feels at all.

I am SO GRATEFUL for the Marketing as a Creative + Spiritual Practice Calls.

(These calls are happening every month in Dream Book - the next one is Dec 7)

Even just having the intention to keep doing a monthly call keeps me focused on this.

What it feels like is happening for me is that the three parts: marketing, creativity, spirituality, are each their own thing (I visualize them as circles) and then the overlap and ideally I'd like to be working from the centre of all three overlapping. AND understanding that each day I'm likely leaning more towards one of them.

In that, I am noticing how I have been making the creativity and spirituality parts more important, and leaning into them more deeply... and I DO want (and need!) to lean into them deeply but in a way that doesn't discount the marketing aspect.

It really is something to hold the "this is a PRACTICE and I am focused on honouring + following my thoughts, feelings, ideas, experimenting, etc and practicing without pressure" and also "this is a practice around marketing and I do have goals and my goals are important too!".

Reflecting on this, what feels important for me right now is to integrate these in a way I haven't done before.

In one sense - of course this is all integrated because it's all a part of your work. And in another sense, for me, it's like I have been treating these as separate things. Of course my practices INFORMS and NOURISHES what happens in my marketing but there is a totally different relationship and type of connection that I would like to have between the two.

So, what I got from this meditation with the scarabs is that I need to let my goals matter more. This feels really nourishing.

 

PART THREE:

Last week’s focus was: Sit with the question: how do we hold this goal FIRMLY but not with PRESSURE? And bring in the HAPPY FAIRY VIBES.

What happened in the last week? LOTS of sitting with the question. And I did find one answer - you don't HOLD it! You BE it! Which just has a different feeling and approach. And so I was looking at how to BE the artist and writer I want to be..

And that's why I started the embroidery project this week.

That photos is from May, that's my first embroidery experiment, which taught me A LOT! And I meant to keep going, but I didn't. And having all these embroidered me-made clothes feels like an important part of BEING my dream, but also the work of MAKING the clothes feels like part of it, engaging my creativity in that way.

I also went for a 1 hour walk each day, had fun cooking, I'm feeling really good and taking really good care of me. I am SO HAPPY IT'S DECEMBER. I am SO READY for winter, for quiet-inward focus.

What am I learning/How do I feel about this? I feel REALLY EXCITED about all of this, making space to become the artist + writer I want to be.

What do I need now? More quiet. I love how in winter it feels like the world kind of moves further away and I have more space for ME.

What does my dream need now? I see the embroidery there - and a needle appears. I need to keep CREATING.

Taking all of this into account, my focus for the next week is: Nurture my creative flow.

 

PS: Remember: Yikes! The I Am Having A Lot Of Feelings practice is free to access until Dec 5.

Remember: Yikes! The I Am Having A Lot Of Feelings practice is free to access until Dec 5.

These are practices like yoga is a practice.

You don't do yoga once, and then three years later wonder why your back is stiff is stiff when you "did yoga" to stretch it out.

This is why I offer so many different practices, so that you can find the one that works on any given day.

As you repeat them, listen to your own intuition and creativity and you'll find your own ways of working with them.

While I was doing the Yikes! I Am Having A Lot Of Feelings meditation I wanted to draw it out instead of fill in the journaling sheet, so I did.

(see photo above)

I love doing this. Creating a visual representation of the feelings helps me see them from a different perspective. And as you can see - no art skills needed! This is NOT about making art that looks like something, it's about being with your feelings in the moment. Giving them colours and shapes.

Once I was done, it was depressing to see how far away I was from the "happy fairy vibes" that I was going for this week.

And then I realised - actually I need a nap.

And then my Dream Self (from another practice we do in Dream Book) came in and whispered "You are doing great. Keep going." and I FELT IT.

We all feel feelings sometimes! It's ok!

Such a relief.

(Journaling cutout from Dream Book)

I was doing the Dream Lab practice to meet with the soul of my dream and I couldn't hold it.

This is the basic practice I teach for Dream Work, I have done it daily for YEARS and today... I couldn't get into it.

As I tried, it felt like a wave went through me, all of the liquids in my body flowed to my feet.

What the heck? It felt like my body was at risk for a tsumani.

Why is it so hard for me to hold this dream?

This isn't usually a helpful kind of question. But it feels like the question I have right now.

This question likely can't lead to any helpful information for what to DO next but it could lead to more information about the inner work I need to do.

So: Why is it so hard for me to hold this dream?

Now I feel this uncomfortable sensation in my throat.

And I want to hide. Like I feel this strong burning desire to pull blankets over me.

My ear starts to hurt.

Everything feels foggy and dense. No answers anywhere.

See what I mean about this not being a helpful question?

OK let's try - what would help me be able to hold it?

Then my Dream Self (from another Dream Work practice we use in Dream Book) intervenes. "Honey, stop asking questions. BE WITH the process AS IT IS"

Oh, right.

However I am holding my dream right now is how I am holding my dream. I can only get "better" at it by practicing.

AND ALSO

Holding it more firmly is NOT better.

AUTHENTIC IS BEST

I have a lot of ambivalence. This is how it's showing up today.

I ask the happy fairy and the business bitch to join me.

I want to ask the happy fairy how she can hold the dream so well but then I see - she's not HOLDING it. She's BEING it. She's dancing and not thinking about any of this.

So I look over at the business bitch. She's sitting on the floor looking at spreadsheets. She's got a snack and she looks really happy.

They are both doing what they want to do.

So what am I doing?

Now my dream is a light in a jar sitting in front of me.

I am working through my shit.

I am staying clear about what I want next even when I have no clue how to get it and thinking about it stirs up A LOT of crap.

And then the answer comes and I now I know what to do next:

I need a new set of Alchemy Wheels - another practice from Dream Book, this one bridges Dream Work with Inner Work and Outer Work.

So that's what I'll do next.